Giving birth alone? Doula?

CH27

Given the current state of midwifery services in some areas I think if you can afford a doula then go for it.
The peace of mind she give you will be well worth it imo.

onlyroz

I think I'd rather be on my own. I remember being mortified that I pooed myself in front of my husband, while giving birth to my son - and I vomited quite a lot during both births. I'm glad he was there but there were definitely times when I'd rather have been on my own.

davidswife

I had a doula (homebirth, no pain relief) she was so great that the midwives only got involved at the very last minute. The doula knew my birth plan, completely supported me and she taught me hypno therapy techniques. It was the best £250 I've ever spent.

Gingham_R

I'm a trained doula. You have lots of time to find someone you feel completely comfortable with and, as said earlier, she won't be a stranger by the time you go into labour. You could also have the benefit of having her around afterwards too.

It's not for everyone, but it costs nothing to look into it. You may get a really good feel for someone. Most doulas work in (at least) pairs, so that if there was an emergency that prevented them making it to the birth, you would have met the doula who would stand in, though it's rare that this would be needed.

I had a family emergency just after my training that took me out of the loop for a few months and I didn't pursue it for long but I have been a post natal doula a couple of times and that's something worth thinking about too.

newbela

Google 'Doula UK' to find the national doula organisation. If you enter in your postcode you'll find the local doulas to you. Doula UK have a rigid professional code that all members adhere to. All members have also completed an accredited course and mentorship process. The most i've ever heard doulas charge in this country is about £800, but lots charge less, and like others here have mentioned there is a hardship fund for people on low incomes. I had a doula when i had my daughter. Her presence was invaluable in helping me to feel safe and trust my body to birth my baby. I eventually became one, and am now in my mentorship process.

Read up about them on the Doula UK website. You usually will have met a doula a few times before you birth, unless you book very late, or go into labour early. It advised to meet a few local ones and then chose you one you gel with best! That initial meeting will be about an hour long and is always free. They are always there to answer phone calls and emails with any questions you have, or just when you need to talk. And of course they'll be with you throughout the birth. There are also post natal doulas who spend time with you after the baby is born, supporting you and your family.

Rozdoula

I am a Doula. So many people don't know about them. Doula's offer practical and emotional support to women and their partners during labour and birth. I am also a postnatal Doula which means I give support to women and their families in the weeks following the birth of their baby. i.e. help with breastfeeding, helping out with older siblings, light housework, or looking after the baby for a while so that Mum can have a much deserved rest. With all the cut backs we are going to be needed more and more.

meritaten

no one seems to have asked exactly how far away your OH is going to be! unless he is on the other side of the world would it be possible that he could be with you? most first births take some time, and if you phoned him as soon as it was confirmed you were in labour could he immediately come to you? dont you have a friend who would be your OHs stand in?

Nicki

I assumed from the first post that OP's husband would be away on active service with the military. I am not sure if this is the case that they are geared up to release him at short notice to attend a birth!

Ravenlady_2

meritaten wrote: »

no one seems to have asked exactly how far away your OH is going to be! unless he is on the other side of the world would it be possible that he could be with you? most first births take some time, and if you phoned him as soon as it was confirmed you were in labour could he immediately come to you? dont you have a friend who would be your OHs stand in?

This is baby 4.

peachyprice

Nicki wrote: »

I assumed from the first post that OP's husband would be away on active service with the military. I am not sure if this is the case that they are geared up to release him at short notice to attend a birth!

Oops, I thought he was in a band