Partner dismissed - am in despair

denla

dandelionclock30 wrote: »

.

What an awful thing to say, you are so judgemental towards people who have criminal records or who have been sacked etc.
Why would she have left him? people are more than their jobs you know, and he was going to get help for his problems.
Plenty of people with criminal records and who have been sacked do go on to have good lives with well paid jobs and nice partners.
Life isnt always so cut and dried and you never know what will happen to you.

Employers are all judgemental. They have a large pool of applicants to draw from, and they need to be judgemental to select the best out of them.

Why wouldn't she leave him? He's a drug addict who assaults people. Maybe he even assaults her and his children from time to time... Does she really want her children growing up under his influence?

dandelionclock30

denla wrote: »

Employers are all judgemental. They have a large pool of applicants to draw from, and they need to be judgemental to select the best out of them.

Why wouldn't she leave him? He's a drug addict who assaults people. Maybe he even assaults her and his children from time to time... Does she really want her children growing up under his influence?

.

1/3 of all men have a criminal conviction but not 1/3 of all working age men are on the dole. So employers are employing people with a past, often in good jobs. So employers out there are definatley giving people second chances. Like it or not.
Just because he pushed someone at work, doesnt mean that he is assaulting his wife! Thats a big leap from nowhere!
Often people do stick with their partners in the face of adversity. Some women even stay with their partners after they have done much worse that this. It may be difficult for people to get their head round but plenty of people stay with their partners after they have even murdered people. Never mind smoking weed.

Yorkie1

denla wrote: »

Any update on what's happened to that guy and his wife/girlfriend? I'm guessing he's still unemployed and she's left him.

Did you resurrect a year-old thread just so you could get a fix of soap opera from others' lives? :mad:

Takeaway_Addict

Yorkie1 wrote: »

Did you resurrect a year-old thread just so you could get a fix of soap opera from others' lives? :mad:

No Duchy did.....

denla

Yorkie1 wrote: »

Did you resurrect a year-old thread just so you could get a fix of soap opera from others' lives?

Actually, someone else resurrected this thread. I saw this thread on the front page so I had a look and just had to comment.

warez22

Hi there

Just thought I would give an update as to where we went from the awful situation I found myself in when I first posted.

My partner didnt get his job back, in fact he ended up in court and got fined.

However, out of it, over a year down the line he is as clean as a whistle. He suffered from hideous withdrawal symptoms but stuck with it.

At the end of it he is now unrecognisable from the man that was addicted to drugs. Even though it was only cannabis it is scary the effect it can have on someone.

He is kind, gentle, fun to be with and a really great guy. He has set up his own business and although it was slow in the beginning, he is doing really well and financially we are now better off than before he was sacked.

He is the first to admit shame and regret as to what happened, and has done so on many occasions, but I think the way things have now turned out, it was for the greater good.

He no longer works night shifts, he has a business that he enjoys and he spends more quality time with the children. The aggression and everything else that went with cannabis has completely gone.

I would reiterate my thanks to everybody who helped me through an extremely tough time.

We are now in a happy place and it just goes to show that you never know what is around the corner and how the most desperate of situations can end up putting you in a positive place.

warez22:)

Takeaway_Addict

warez22 wrote: »

Hi there

Just thought I would give an update as to where we went from the awful situation I found myself in when I first posted.

My partner didnt get his job back, in fact he ended up in court and got fined.

However, out of it, over a year down the line he is as clean as a whistle. He suffered from hideous withdrawal symptoms but stuck with it.

At the end of it he is now unrecognisable from the man that was addicted to drugs. Even though it was only cannabis it is scary the effect it can have on someone.

He is kind, gentle, fun to be with and a really great guy. He has set up his own business and although it was slow in the beginning, he is doing really well and financially we are now better off than before he was sacked.

He is the first to admit shame and regret as to what happened, and has done so on many occasions, but I think the way things have now turned out, it was for the greater good.

He no longer works night shifts, he has a business that he enjoys and he spends more quality time with the children. The aggression and everything else that went with cannabis has completely gone.

I would reiterate my thanks to everybody who helped me through an extremely tough time.

We are now in a happy place and it just goes to show that you never know what is around the corner and how the most desperate of situations can end up putting you in a positive place.

warez22:)

Fantastic news!

antonic

Really happy for you both !

warez22 wrote: »

Hi there

Just thought I would give an update as to where we went from the awful situation I found myself in when I first posted.

My partner didnt get his job back, in fact he ended up in court and got fined.

However, out of it, over a year down the line he is as clean as a whistle. He suffered from hideous withdrawal symptoms but stuck with it.

At the end of it he is now unrecognisable from the man that was addicted to drugs. Even though it was only cannabis it is scary the effect it can have on someone.

He is kind, gentle, fun to be with and a really great guy. He has set up his own business and although it was slow in the beginning, he is doing really well and financially we are now better off than before he was sacked.

He is the first to admit shame and regret as to what happened, and has done so on many occasions, but I think the way things have now turned out, it was for the greater good.

He no longer works night shifts, he has a business that he enjoys and he spends more quality time with the children. The aggression and everything else that went with cannabis has completely gone.

I would reiterate my thanks to everybody who helped me through an extremely tough time.

We are now in a happy place and it just goes to show that you never know what is around the corner and how the most desperate of situations can end up putting you in a positive place.

warez22:)

marlot

warez22 wrote: »

....
We are now in a happy place and it just goes to show that you never know what is around the corner and how the most desperate of situations can end up putting you in a positive place.

warez22:)

Really, really pleased - well done to both of you.

My wife works with teenagers and I wish some of the kids would get an understanding of how much even 'just cannabis' can muck up their lives.

TrickyWicky

warez22 wrote: »

I am now in despair. He has now decided that he is not going to smoke cannabis anymore as he has now discovered that it destroys everything.

I have been trying for years to get him to give up but obviously losing his job has been the 'rock bottom' moment he needed.

I work 24 hours a week, have 2 young children to look after..

Don't get your hopes up about him giving up. It won't happen. He might give up temporarily but as soon as he finds work again it'll be "Let the good times roll". If he was serious he wouldn't be smoking it when you have 2 kids to look after. He'd be putting them first and the fact that he puts himself and his druggie ways before them says it all.

You need to consider your future with the guy. Until he finds work he's a dead weight to you and your family and is one more mouth to feed. Let him come home one day and find his cases packed on the doorstep until he gets professional help.

I've worked with people who smoke cannabis in the past and they're always awkward to get along with and seem to have a warped sense of right and wrong. Wrong doesn't seem to exist to them and anyone who dares to say anything to the contrary is a pain, a nag, a hassle etc.