Second Chance?

escortg3

My experience is it didnt stop at once.

Always sorry and begs forgiveness, same next time and so on.

I did put up with it for my children.

Would i now in new relationship. Would i hell

Pee

If he scared me and if it felt like he was being disrespectful, I would move out. I would give him a second chance, because this would be completely out of character for him - we've been together six years and he's never come close - but it would be with a sinking heart knowing that I have never heard a happy ending to this type of scenario.

If he made sufficient effort to woo me back, I would move back in, but this would be over a period of months and I would have to completely trust that it would never happen again before I did that. If I was wrong and it then did happen again, he wouldn't see me for dust and I'd be letting his biggest best friend know as I know his very correct views on such unchivalrous behaviour.

tinktinktinkerbell

i would hit him back then HE would be out the door

JustKeepSwimming_2

I agree with Solstice-Twilight on this one - but my own personal experience is that it rarely stops after the first strike. I wouldn't put up with any type of violence now, but did before I was older & wiser.

Hermia

No second chances here. Obviously there may be exceptions if it is totally not the person's fault (e.g. when my uncle had a brain tumour his behaviour was all over the place).

I just couldn't live knowing that someone could hit me. I personally think an adult should be able to control themselves even if they are angry. I have never come close to being violent and most people I know don't behave like that even when angry or drunk etc. I am a tiny person and a bloke could easily do me serious damage if he hit me so I just wouldn't take the chance. I expect respect.

I have met people who are very provoking and do wind their partner up. I know a guy who put his fist through a wall when his wife paraded her younger boyfriend in front of him. I could understand why he took his frustration out on the wall. But, I have honestly never tried to wind a man up. I am boringly rational and grown-up when it comes to arguments so I don't think anyone has the right to thump me.

make_me_wise

That would be it, I told hubby as much on our wedding day actually during our 'first dance'. He knows he has one chance with me and if he wrecks that I would never take him back. Part of my job involves working closely with women who have suffered abuse and violence. It generally starts with a little slap and always escalates. Hope you are okay OP.

pupsicola

I took beating after beating from my ex. His violence started with a slap. I forgave that and he took it as a green light that he could do whatever he liked to me and I would suffer it. If you dont walk away early its unlikely you ever will. The violence doesn't just effect someone physically it screws you up mentally as well.

I walked on eggshells round him for years. It took for a police officer to tell me to get out or myself and our children would leave our house in a wooden box.

I wish when he had hit me the first time I had decided that was it and not given him chance after chance. All that gives you is years of fear followed by years of regret. I strongly feel now that there is nothing someone can do or say that can provoke or justify anyone hitting them.

VfM4meplse

make_me_wise wrote: »

That would be it, I told hubby as much on our wedding day actually during our 'first dance'.

FnL, you know how to romance a man :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:!

make_me_wise

VfM4meplse wrote: »

FnL, you know how to romance a man :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:!

That is pretty much what he said at the time too. He has never laid a violent hand on me though, so he took me seriously

pinksleepybear

I know the title of the thread will draw in people who have had experience of dv, but the number of responses and the prevalence is making me weep.

Here's to all you strong women who got out.