Second Chance?

DS4215

Once is a mistake, Twice is a conincidence, Three times is a pattern.

VfM4meplse

Hard as it may be, you need to cut ties if you have children. I would advise the same even if you don't, but your decision whether to leave the relationship or not will only impact on yourself and you are old enough to take the consequences.

I was brought up in a violent environment and it is very damaging. Year of experience enable me to sniff out violent tendencies a mile off, and I stay away for my own sanity. Whatever his other qualities, a violent man will never be anything other than bad news.

ERICS_MUM

Personally I wouldn't give another chance to a man who raised his arm to me even if it didn't actually strike me. Anyone who has that much anger in them should be avoided.

Good luck OP, and I hope you find the strength to do what you know deep-down is the right thing.

Linda xx

bagginslover

Only if it were a situation like the poster whose chap was asleep would I forgive.

I was in an emothonally abusive relationship, and he'd repeatedly go as if to punch me in the face, then be all proud that he restrained himself. Of course he made out it was my fault he'd raised is fist in the first place, but cos he was such a great person he didn't follow through...yeah really great.

yvonne13_2

hell no. If any man raised there hands to me he better be prepared not to go to work the next day because he would end up in hospital, with the frying pan mark still showing on his face.

jakes-mum

Im in the depends on the circumstances group, if you were out of control of your own temper and he slapped you round the face after trying everything else then yes I would give him a second chance as I dont see that as him hitting you rather trying to get you to regain control of yourself. If he raised his fist in an arguement and blacked your eye, then no I wouldnt.

VfM4meplse

yvonne13 wrote: »

hell no. If any man raised there hands to me he better be prepared not to go to work the next day because he would end up in hospital, with the frying pan mark still showing on his face.

Easy enough to say, harder to implement I'm afraid. Don't underestimate the mental turmoil that goes hand in hand with domestic abuse, you can't understand how someone who can be so loving most of the time can also hurt you. The mindgames and shame of being battered adds a dimension. Not an easy decision at all when it's you in the middle of it.

yvonne13_2

VfM4meplse wrote: »

Easy enough to say, harder to implement I'm afrraid. Don't underestimate the mental turmoil that goes hand in hand with domestic abuse, you can't understand how someone who can be so loving most of the time can also hurt you. The mindgames and shame of being battered adds a dimension. Not an easy decision at all when it's you in the middle of it.

I have experienced this. And it's not nice after 14 years of abuse with no-one believing.

DUKE

No second chance as this would be just the beginning of a string of beatings.

scottish_lassy

My memory as a child is my father hitting (or throwing things) at my mother. So when my ex hit me, I took my child and left. Hopefully he would think twice about doing it to someone else.

If you have children you have to seriously think what they are seeing, hearing or sensing. You can decide what you put up with but your children deserve to be protected.