Grrrrr my DS

hitatotatus

Hi Nicki,
My son was also in "Sturdy" trousers when he was 11 !:rotfl:
He is now 13 and all the fat round his middle has gone and he has shot up by about 2ft.
He still eats ALL THE TIME tho. I tell him to eat whatever he likes as long as he exercises - swimming, kung fu, cycling, walking round town, dancing.
It really is hard for us adults to have willpower and keep to diets and exercise regimes, so I think to burden a young boy with this is unrealistic. I would take a long term view, keep making healthy food as you have been but not talk about it too much with him. I would insist he gets himself down to the pool (I have to forcefully persuade my son on most occassions, but once he has been he feels great).

At age 11 I was really concerned about his weight but it sorted itself out when I bought him Michael Jackson on Wii. He would do this for hours and really worked up a sweat - I reckon he dropped about half a stone. If you have a Wii and your son likes music I would highly recommend it as a great form of fun exercise.

mumps

mildred1978 wrote: »

My friend's daughter is average height but very very heavy. You can see from looking at her that she's very overweight. She's still breastfeeding - as often as 2 hourly - through the night and during the day she's always got something in her hand to eat. I worry that she's learning to ignore her 'full' feelings. She's not hitting her developmental milestones either. Crawling/standing/walking must be hard when you weigh over twice as much as you should.

But I seem to be the only one that's at all worried.

My son was off the charts for weight, height and head circ, I would have thought I was having a holiday if he only fed every 2 hrs. My mother said he would never learn to talk as he was always breastfeeding. I eventually managed to wean him at 3. A I said earlier at 6'4" and with ribs that can be counted from the other side of the room I don't think anyone could call him fat. We can't get trousers long enough in his waist size, they just don't make them. He is off to uni in a few weeks so his development did work out in the end. Kids all develop at different rates. I was paranoid when he was fat and would go mad if anyone said he was and then got worried about how thin he was, I decided at one point he was diabetic and asked the doctor to check him and then asked the doctor if he thought he might have TB. Mothers worry, well I certainly do, we do our best and still beat ourselves up, it goes with the job description I think.

I know it doesn't always work out, my niece was an overweight baby and she is an overweight adult, but I do think that an 11 year old boy is likely to shoot up in the near future and it could all resolve itself. I hope so anyway and to the OP it sounds like he has a healthy diet and a healthy lifestyle so, from a worrier, try not to worry too much.

milliebear00001

I haven't read the whole thread, but two things strike me. Firstly, he's about to begin a major growth spurt and so it makes some sense to assume that if he continues to eat a good diet and balances this with exercise, the 'excess' weight, will then become absorbed by his greater height.

Secondly, there's been a lot of discussion about what you're feeding him, but not much about the (at least) other half of the story - burning off what goes in. It's a simple relationship between intake and output. He has been eating a healthy diet all along - just perhaps a bit too much of it. Reduce portions slightly and up his exercise levels until he 'evens out' then keep up the exercise.

At 11, he should be exercising through running round and playing for at least an hour or so every day. Karate twice a week simply isn't going to cut it - how much of that session does he actually spend with a raised heartrate? Not much I bet.

anguk

It seems to me that he's been eating healthy food all along with perhaps a bit too much potato/rice/pasta. I personally don't agree with putting a child on a diet unless advised by your GP and I'm also not a fan of nutritional advice off the internet because anyone can call themselves a nutritionist without any qualifications (that said I'm sure there are some very good nutritionists out there), if it was my child I would want advice from a fully qualified dietician by referral from my GP.

Personally I would stick with the healthy home cooked food you've always given him but with you in charge of the portion control and I would up the amount of exercise he does. What about something like cycling? Most kids love riding a bike especially while the weather is nice. I firmly believe that for many kids their weight problems are caused by lack of exercise, they just don't seem to move about like when I was young. They're driven everywhere instead of walking, they don't play out and run about as much, playing football, riding bikes etc. The best advice I've ever heard is burn off more than you put in, that's why years ago people ate more calories but weren't as overweight, they moved about more or had manual jobs.

You say that you eat the same as your son but you're not hungry, that may be true but you also have to take into account the fact that you're not a growing boy approaching puberty, if you follow the link that rainbow81 posted you'll see that your son needs more calories than you each day.

pebbles88

Did using BMI to measure weight not get left behind ages ago as it got proved to not be accurate way to do it d ue to not being able to take into account various body types? ie all athletes being morbidly obese due to extra muscle weight? and also as each height has quite a large range of weight in their healthy range, ie: i am 5' 3", and for me to be in a healthy weight range i can be anything from 8st 4lbs - to 10st 2lbs. which is a range of nearly 2 stone!:eek:

Nicki, i think your concern over this for your son is commendable, and quite rare these days, especially the encouragement to make sure your kids get a set amount of exercise each day. so please dont think any of the following is criticism ok?

something that caught my eye whilst reading this was you saying your other 2 children are normally underweight? and that you yourself are a size 10? what kind of build is his Dad?

i am just wondering if perhaps its not just down to food, that there might be something else going on? not necessarily something bad, but somehing that might be slowing his metabolism down or anything?

It might give you more answers to take him to see his GP for a few tests to check if there is anything there?

at 11, my nephew went through a cycle of getting very small tummy, and then shooting up a in height and looking scrawny. right now, at nearly 16, he is 5' 11", doesnt have a scrap of fat on him, is very muscly, but not body building type style, naturally wiry kinda way IYSWIM.

i think you're only looking out for him the best way you know how, but the food list you posted 'does' look very small for a young lad, whose body is going to start some major changes very very soon as puberty sets in. which put me on the road of thinking about the rest of the familys builds, and how it might not be as simple as the food.

i would also see the GP before changing his diet as he is, and will still be for several years growing and putting down bone density that he will be stuck with for life, (stuck doesnt sound right but i couldnt think of another term for it!) and needs variious nutrients from all food groups in abundance in order to do this. by restricting or cutting down in certain areas in order to get his weight under control, it might store up problems for later.

i hope that all across as intended, its middle of the night, im suffering a big bout of insomnia for last few nights and i am a bit fuzzy.

you sound like a wonderful mum, really hope you find a solution to this asap. :T

Molly41

Hi,
I have not had chance to read through the whole thread but we did MEND with my DS3 and it worked wonders. Its a whole family approach with exercise and classed and is very friendly/ child centred. It used methods such as displaying a packet of Haribro and the kids had to choose the same weight in sugar (horrifying but very effective)! DS3 has now had a growth spurt and is now really tall so im sure it will rectify itself but Mend helped all of us x

lessonlearned

Hi Nicki

Read your post with interest.

How tall is your boy. Unless he is exceptionally tall for his age I would suggest that he is in for a major growth spurt. An inch a month is not uncommon when puberty hits. It is also quite common for children, but especially boys, to become quite "chunky' prior to that growth spurt. They need to lay down some ballast to help fuel that growth spurt.

I don't think he is eating very much at all - at that age my boys seemed to have hollow legs and were constantly ravenous. Seriously. They would come home from school tuck into toast and cake, then have a huge dinner at around six and an hour later would be moaning they were hungry again.

I would not give them cake then but if they were hungry I would make them a sandwich. They would then have supper before going to bed.

Also several glasses of whole milk a day - at least 1pt a day. Children need it for calcium for their bones and teeth. Also, children shouldn't really have semi skimmed milk - they need whole milk because they need the fat soluble vitamins, especially Vit D. Semi skimmed has had those vitamins removed in the skimming process.

I think part of the complaining about portion sizes etc could be linked to the "monitoring" of his food intake etc. It seems to be the case when people hear the word "diet" they start to become obsessed with food - it's often psychological. If you could relax the monitoring/recording of food intake etc it might help. Too much focus on how much/what he is eating might be making him a bit obsessive about food.

Food should always be a pleasure - never an issue.

I would agree that he doesn't seem to be overly physical either. He needs a lot more exercise and activity - to build strong bones and build up muscle.

Rather than just doing structured activities such as karate just twice a week he should be running his legs off - football or whatever, walking to and fro from school etc. At that age he should be bouncing around, practically unable to sit still.

Just as a matter of interest I was reading how BMI is not really a very good way of thinking about weight etc. Apparently, using BMI as a guide Brad Pit would be obese and Arnold Schwarzenegger would be morbidly obese.

Re the Oyster Card. Yes it is annoying of course, but I'm afraid that is just normal. They all "forget" and "lose" stuff. Just have to put that one down to experience I'm afraid.

Good luck and try not worry - let him eat - not rubbish of course, but don't abolish all his favourite treats.

Chip shop chips now and again won't do any harm and a good "doorstep'' jam butty or banana sandwich with a glass of milk is a great sweet treat that will fill him up a bit and which is reasonably healthy. Better that than sweets or crisps.

tankgirl1

How about doing slimming world green days only?

This means you can eat all the pasta, rice, jacket pots, 'slimming world chips & roasties', fruit, veg, quorn, beans - lots of filling stuff! But no bread, cheese, milk only for brews, meat etc - I am a 95% veggie and lost tons of inches & weight on green days without ever feeling hungry!

Red days are mostly meat so I avoided them, but either way it may help keep him full whilst loosing weight?

gunsandbanjos

tankgirl1 wrote: »

How about doing slimming world green days only?

This means you can eat all the pasta, rice, jacket pots, 'slimming world chips & roasties', fruit, veg, quorn, beans - lots of filling stuff! But no bread, cheese, milk only for brews, meat etc - I am a 95% veggie and lost tons of inches & weight on green days without ever feeling hungry!

Red days are mostly meat so I avoided them, but either way it may help keep him full whilst loosing weight?

You can have bread/cheese/meat/milk but it is in controlled quantities. I do green days too. They are fab! Cheese omelette/SW chips and beans yum:)

tankgirl1

gunsandbanjos wrote: »

You can have bread/cheese/meat/milk but it is in controlled quantities. I do green days too. They are fab! Cheese omelette/SW chips and beans yum:)

Lol - as I recall tho its something daft like one slice of granary bread OR some miniscule amount of cheese. Yeah I took the milk for brews every day!

I don't eat meat, but love the whole quorn, veg, pasta, rice etc etc - just struggling with the motivation these days - hell 3 meals a day is a challenge atm, and a victory when I manage it!

Damn you broken brain!!!!!