Bad Bad Booby

taxi73

kissjenn wrote: »

I've got to go to the ward after the line's in on Wednesday. I'll ask them what they think and see if they've any idea of timescales.

Both mine have been triple neg as well. It's fascinating how only 15% of breast cancer in white women is triple negative but rises to 25% in black and latin women. You'd think that would offer some interesting opportunities for research.

Are they going to give you radio this time or try Tamoxifen if you're a wee bit estrogen receptive? Hope you're not in any pain this time.

No oestregeon whatsoever in mine so no tamoxifen etc for me...they couldn't give me radiotherapy as the overlap was too big from radiotherapy last time....I'm hoping that the chemo has worked for now but won't know until I get the scan results...no pain this time only knew from mammo and scan that it had spread to sub pec muscle and lymph glands..had lymph glands removed but can't operate on the muscle so really am in limbo as can't face any more chemo at the minute

taxi73

kissjenn wrote: »

Oh Rising no apology necessary. I think it raises a very valid point, intended or not.

The scary thing is that I had no sign of cancer under my arm 9 months ago...ultra sound, palpation, mammogram etc. It's gone from nothing to 3cm plus in 9 months. That means the cells are doubling every 10 to 14 days and the reason I want to shrink it asap.

Last time was exactly the same. Felt it in the shower on the Thursday. Hoped it would go away. Still there Friday, went to Dr same day and rest is history.

that's the problem with triple negative..it grows so quick and is so aggressive

kissjenn

I can't have radio again either. They want it to shrink before surgery as it's in an awkward place without much spare tissue.

We really are doing this well thee and me. But we will beat it Taxi. I'm terrified of the chemo this time round as it's going to floor me. I'll need you to keep on my case my friend.

First big challenge is Hickman on Wednesday. Ridiculously scared but I will do it...need to try and find an extremely happy place

taxi73

I don't feel much use to anyone at the moment as my head is all wrong.
You are much stronger than me.I'm so proud of you.
If it goes in like a Picc line then it won't be too bad but don't know about hickman line as not had one...told you I'm not much use

kissjenn

Excuse the French but bo11ocks.

You're amazing. You've had this thrown at you twice and kept going. You've inspired an amazing family and support network. Loved by all on DFW.

This is a blip. Chemo is hell. You'd be mad if you didn't hate it. You're having a "social pause" and then you'll be back.

I'm fine at the moment cos I don't even have a date. Come the day and I'll be wearing two pairs of pants - my big girls and my pathetic, absorbent woosie ones. Big dose of Lorazepam and begging nurses for extra drugs.

You're my star Taxi. You got me through Round 1. We'll do Round 2 together xxx

taxi73

True Kissjen...we'll get through this x
Am going to bed now as exhausted ..hope you get a decent nights sleep xxx night night xx

sunnyface

Just stumbled across this thread and it's had me engrossed. What amazing women you are, Kissjen and Taxi.
Sending lots and lots of healing vibes and prayers your way - very best of luck, ladies.
Keep strong and believe!
Good luck at BGH, KissJen - it's a great hospital

Seaxwyn

You are BOTH amazing - I'm rooting for you both.

Want-To-Fit-In

Try not to worry to much about the hickman going in. It really isnt so bad amd you are drugged up I didnt find it as bad as the picc and no trouble since its been in. Where as with the picc last time I had nothing but trouble! x

You can do it, it wont be easy but your so strong xx

kissjenn

Want-To-Fit-In wrote: »

Try not to worry to much about the hickman going in. It really isnt so bad amd you are drugged up I didnt find it as bad as the picc and no trouble since its been in. Where as with the picc last time I had nothing but trouble! x

You can do it, it wont be easy but your so strong xx

Hi WTFI.

Thank you so much for sharing about the Hickman. I found the PICC easy to get in and out and hellish in between. Just never worked. Hopefully this will be much better.

Seaxwyn wrote: »

You are BOTH amazing - I'm rooting for you both.

Hi Sea,

Lovely to talk to you again. I've been checking in on your diary. You've made such big, brave changes and sound so positive. Well done you...you deserve all the happiness going.

sunnyface wrote: »

Just stumbled across this thread and it's had me engrossed. What amazing women you are, Kissjen and Taxi.
Sending lots and lots of healing vibes and prayers your way - very best of luck, ladies.
Keep strong and believe!
Good luck at BGH, KissJen - it's a great hospital

Hi SF.

Welcome and thank you for the kind words and thoughts. Much appreciated.


Well set off for work today determined to get my head down as it'll only be another couple of weeks or so. Got about halfway and had to pull over to be ill. Spoke to Dr and we've now added bedtime morphine to the mix and sleeping tablets. Theory is if I can sleep without the pain waking me up then I'll be less tired and sick during the day. Down side is painkillers are making me nauseous hence sleeping tablets to knock me out.

The big hope is that when chemo does start, it'll reduce the tumour and the pain it's causing.

Also talked about work and we agreed I should tidy things up now and have some stress-free time before I start treatment. So going to get through today and speak to boss tomorrow after the line is in. I'll know better then how I feel.

I want to do a good, complete handover both because professionally I care and because I'd like to work there again. I acknowledge tho that I can only do what I can do.

Onwards and upwards, the only way.