Please help, I feel totally abandoned!

Sam____2

welshmoneylover wrote: »

Yes, there is a sympathetic bunch on this board including people who have 2 jobs, pay taxes from those jobs for wreckless wenches to go out and get themselves pregnant and expect taxpayers to support them :mad:

The OP has paid tax and more than likely will do again after she's had her baby. I'm pretty sure she didn't "go out and get herself pregnant" usually takes 2 to do that. Bet the father doesn't get a slagging for his part in it.
I pay tax my OH pays his tax, blah blah blah, god forbid you're circumstances should change and you have to rely on benefits for a bit (don't say it will never happen as you don't know what's round the corner) Give the woman a break...

Sam____2

welshmoneylover wrote: »

Nothing wrong with supporting people when they need a safety net when they get stuck with circumstances that are NOT of their own making.

Hmmm,
smokers-cancer
obese people -diabetes
extreme sports-broken bones etc etc
do I need to go on?

are these people more worthy to claim benefits than someone who is pregnant?

yaimee

Well I imagine that some of the tax that I've paid over the years has gone towards helping to support people who are in circumstances of their own making, and I don't resent that and never have.
Anyway, my opinion of the welfare system isn't particularly relevant.
Again, I really hope that if anyone who has posted with their advice and comments today ever ends up in a horrible situation (be it of their own making or not) that they are shown exactly as much support and empathy as they have shown me

yaimee

I think it's extremely unfair to take my comments out of context like that, I have stated on numerous occasions that I intend to be back in employment and education ASAP after I give birth.
I would also much, much, much prefer to be paying tax, but I think that everyone is aware that employment is difficult to come by at the moment, so I took what I could get. So I don't pay tax, I also have absolutely no rights as a worker, can be sacked with no reason and no notice, can't have any holiday or sick pay and can't complain about any of it. So trust me, I'd rather be paying tax.

yaimee

And, if I had been paying tax (which I would like to reiterate, I would LOVE to have been) I wouldn't be in this mess because I would be entitled to SMP and would have to claim any benefits at all. So in conclusion, I really, really wish I had been paying tax. I was desperate for a job and was just grateful to be offered something, as so many people are finding it so hard to get work at the moment.

DaisyFlower

yaimee wrote: »

I don't think it's very fair for you to comment that I haven't considered the financial implications of my pregnancy or child, because that isn't the case.

From that statement, it sounds like you were responsible and considered the financial implications before planning the child - whats changed so much with those plans? Or were the plans the state?

If finances are strained then perhaps taking a full year off is a luxury and working sooner rather than later may be the best option. You'll need a nursery anyway once studying so will need to book a place anyway.

yaimee

The baby was a (happy) surprise but after finding out, my intention was to be supported by my partner of 4 years for that time, and to utilise help offered to all parents by the state, but this is no longer possible, as partner has naffed off.
I'm not intending to take a year off work, just a year off university, this is because my baby is due near the end of the first semester of my final year at university, during my exams. Uni has advised that I take the year out as they don't feel that I will be able to complete my work and exams to a satisfactory standard and to be honest, although I'd rather get my degree over and done with it would be a waste of a lot of time and money if I didn't complete my final year to the best of my ability.

Torry_Quine

yaimee wrote: »

The baby was a (happy) surprise but after finding out, my intention was to be supported by my partner of 4 years for that time, and to utilise help offered to all parents by the state, but this is no longer possible, as partner has naffed off.
I'm not intending to take a year off work, just a year off university, this is because my baby is due near the end of the first semester of my final year at university, during my exams. Uni has advised that I take the year out as they don't feel that I will be able to complete my work and exams to a satisfactory standard and to be honest, although I'd rather get my degree over and done with it would be a waste of a lot of time and money if I didn't complete my final year to the best of my ability.

It's a shame you feel that you need to justify yourself. It is nobodies business how you came to be in your present situation.

69chick

Yaimee, If I were you I would take the advice on here that you have and stop looking at this thread, as it seems too many people are itching to come on here and judge others and post nasty remarks....You would probably have been better off googling than coming on here.

I wish you well with your pregnancy and studies and hope you can get a bit of assistance from your uni as they may well have something in place for hardship...

yaimee

Thanks Torrie, was just reading back a few of my posts and am pretty shocked to see how much I've actually said about my life and situation. I suppose it's because I know that I'm in less than perfect circumstances for bringing a child into the world and am upset with myself about it.
But you're right, I only really wanted a bit of advice, so should't be justifying myself to all these people.
Thanks