Depression

EthelBloggs

Hiya sps..

you have been thru the wars!!!! Welcome to this thread and to MSE as a whole

you can get all the info you need to reclaim your bank charges here

http://forums.moneysavingexpert.com/forumdisplay.html?f=102

sps_2

Heh Ethel Bloggs thank you so very much.And to Sugar Coated Poison...I loved the quote. It bought a smile to my face with a tear in my eye at the same time. Thank You. You seem like really decent people. Thank You.

sps_2

Thank you so much!

Twinny99

Hi everyone :hello:

I've popped in for a moan and a whinge - sorry

In the last 2 weeks I've lost 2 family members. My Uncle (Dad's brother) died really suddenly 2 weeks ago and neither myself or Mum went to the funeral (in Dublin) because he was buried only 3 days after he died and it would have been really painful and horrible. I know thats no excuse and that all funerals are horrible but we both decided that we would go together in a few weeks time to see everyone then.

Then on Monday my Nana died (Dad and Uncles Mum) equally suddenly and I found out last night that the funeral is tomorrow. I was going to go and fly back straight afterwards but the flights were at awkward times. One meant that I would only actually be in Dublin for an hour and a half and the other meant I wouldn't be able to get back until really late last night which I didn't really want.

Have just spoken to my Mum and although she was fine about me not going to Nana's funeral she has told me to tell EVERYONE here, both friends and her family that I did go.

Now I feel mega guilty. My Dad died 7 years ago and I still find that very hard to come to terms with he was only 50! He had been ill with what we thought was chest infections for about 6 weeks but was admitted to hospital with breathing problems and diagnosed with the dreaded 'cancer' on the Monday and given between 9 to 18 months to live! He died 2 bloody days later!!!!! Now his favoutrite brother has gone and so has his Mum and I feel like I can't be bothered to go to the funeral and Im sure Dad would want me to go.

I dont even like going to the supermarket by myself let alone flying to Dublin and back on my own! Im know Im a grown woman and feel really stupid and pathetic but thats just me


Anyway, Im sorry for ranting on but I needed to get it off my chest.

sorry sorry x

Sugar_Coated_Owl

Hello sps, welcome to MSE. Everyone is really friendly and caring on these boards. I'm sure you will find lots of support here.

I'm not sure of the answer to your question. Perhaps you could have a look on the Debt Free Wannabe or Reclaim your bank charges board. Hopefully they will be able to help you.

sps_2

Hi Razorbladekisses,

Thank you so very much. This site is obviously a minefield and i clearly need to put some quality time into searching the site. In the meantime I'm so very grateful to you for responding so quickly.

SPS

Sugar_Coated_Owl

Gosh Twinny99 (((HUGS))) I'm sorry to hear of your loss. It sounds as though it isn't a case of you not being bothered to go to the funeral, it's that it isn't easy for you to actually attend.

Are you still planning to visit the family in a few weeks time?

xxx

sps_2

We all deal with grief and rejection in our own ways. You sound as if you had a wonderful loving relationship with your Dad, Uncle and Nana. Just promise yourself each day before you sleep, you talk to them. Whether you're a believer or not is irrelevant, they will hear you if you want them too. Look after yourself and don't feel guilty. You couldn't have done anything about their departures.

SPS x

learning_to_drive

Hi SPS :hello:

Thanks for posting, its a lovely place, we all have our collective issues, and we are a friendly bunch, Im sorry to hear you contemplated suicide, I did the same with finances, not to a bad stage but I thought it would be an easy way out.

The problem with having no cash is that there seems to be no way out, there is always a way, I hope you find the answers you are looking for, definitely claim back the bank charges, its the first step of financial freedom!

learning_to_drive

Hugs twinny, you will find the strength somewhere, grief is a terrible thing, there is no way right way to act, no cure for it. Its a raw human emotion that just takes time, but we are all different.