trying to get children to behave

red_devil

i agree with you all so far especially about the nasty man bit its abit like crying wolf isnt it?

also with dads agree it means they are scared of dad but not you.

victory

It is funny this thread has started because I was just in the garden getting the washing in and over the fence I could hear the neighbour say to her 3 year old (well firstly lots of shouting:rotfl:for the child to behave) 'If you don't behave I will get the dog to bite you':eek: I have seen the dog it is a massive one, I would be scared too:eek: what a thing to say to a little one eh?

gratefulforhelp_2

The "wait til your father gets home" is pointless, it hands all the power to the parent not there at the time.

Mum_of_Boys

victory wrote: »

It is funny this thread has started because I was just in the garden getting the washing in and over the fence I could hear the neighbour say to her 3 year old (well firstly lots of shouting:rotfl:for the child to behave) 'If you don't behave I will get the dog to bite you':eek: I have seen the dog it is a massive one, I would be scared too:eek: what a thing to say to a little one eh?

Ruddy hell... that's just wrong... I;ve 4 boys who push the boundries and am guilty in saying to the youngest that there's a nasty man ( and after reading some posts I'll think twice about saying it) but surely seeing the dog on a daily basis will put the fear of ruddy god into the child??

Maybe it's just me??

Jesswithwings

I have been known to say to the older one "would you behave like that if Daddy was here? No? so why do you think its ok to behave like that when he's not here...etc etc" and I have warned him of not running out of sight because I don't know where he is and someone might try and take him - he knows about stranger danger.

Wondering if I got it wrong now:o

BustyB_2

Im actually the one who wont accept bad behaviour.
DSS listens to me more than OH! (or his mother, infact his behaviour with her is terrible! He is 4 but punched her in the neck the other day. She doesnt tell him off, instead laughs :O!!! )
We dont do the counting thing, as he wants this to happen. He sees it as a game.
He has a terrible temper on him (from his mother), he will get angry straight away, there is no build up to his anger (if that makes sense) . So now we are doing time out, as soon as his temper gets bad, we put him in his room. The door is open and he is free to do what he wants in there until he is ready to apologise.
x

msb5262

Hi OP,
The other day I saw a mum bringing her children across a car park.
The younger one (aged about TWO!!!) didn't want her mum to hold her hand, the mum was saying rather feebly, "Nasty man!" (as in "A nasty man will take you away if you don't hold my hand,") and the little one was taking no notice, so was being allowed to continue walking on her own.
I was really anxious in case a car moved suddenly and hurt her, let alone a nasty man coming along!
This was a classic example of a parent using a silly warning and using it ineffectually to boot...imagine letting a child that age walk alone in a car park. Silly woman!
MsB

Big_Melons

Surely it doesn't matter what people say as long as they actually do something about their childs behaviour, too many people out there that do nothing, like the mums in the local petting zoo today when their sons were throwing stones at the pigs (there's a riot joke in there somewhere), I told them to stop, they carried on, the mums then said "awwww" at the their kids playing with the pigs, not even chavvy types, that I would have kinda expected.

pigpen

given so many families are separated now I cant see Ill tell your dad being much of the threat it was years before when dad wore the trousers and if dad told you off you got a beating with it! That makes the mum look subservient and undermines any authority she did have. I know people who were beaten themselves because they told the children off.. recently.. not in 1801!!

I think it is all in line with asking how dad got on at work today telling him how the children have behaved.. he should know if they are being punished for something and what it is.

There are just as many nasty women as men so that always seems futile.

yummymummy79

I don't use it as it wouldn't work with us, as we're not together, but even when we were together it wasn't something I would say as I would feel it would undermine my authority. I also never threaten anything I'm not prepared to go through with for the same reason. I often hear people say when we're out 'if you don't xyz then we'll go home' or something similar and then never follow it through. That's not sending the best message to the child; it's just empty threats and they can carry on doing what they want with no actual consequences.