Should my wife give up work? Your thoughts and experiences.

Phil3822

She is part of a franchise so much of the hours are set however there is some adjustment that could be done. There is not a huge amount of time with me looking after the children alone because we have childcare. I work shifts and do on call.

There is always the risk that your wife giving up her job won't solve all your problems in the way you expect,

This is a very good point.

In terms of affording it I disagree and think we can with cutting back on non essentials.

PolishBigSpender

She shouldn't give up work. Work gives a woman independence, it also makes her life more interesting. Even if it's not much money, it's still something apart from cooking and cleaning routine for her to do.

And if the house isn't spotless - who cares?

marywooyeah

I was never bored when on maternity leave with my baby, but went back the day after my SMP ended as I felt it was right that I contribute to the household - my husband does not give me any money and I pay the bills, so after SMP I only had around £150 left to buy food and everything else.
I then started uni 9 months later and carried on working alongside uni until feb when I was forced out of my job due to them wanting me to work particular afternoons which I couldnt cos I was at uni - uni wouldnt change my seminar group, work wouldnt change the shifts they wanted me to do - so I had to leave.
working 16hrs I used to earn £402 a month, not very much,but it covered the bills with a bit left over and I lived off my student loan. its now been nearly 6 months since I left, so I have "lost" £2400 in that time, thats a lot of money. Its money I've had to use out of my savings just to keep us going, and since my exams ended I have been at home with my son all day. it does get boring, I feel like my day revolves around mealtimes and cleaning, every day I spend a couple of hours cleaning but no one would believe it if they visited the house. the elec bill has gone up cos we are in the house more, so has the food as we now have snacks and lunch here whereas before he would have those at nursery. not to mention trips swimming, bus fare etc to keep him entertained, I'd say I'm more out of pocket for giving up work.
Don't forget if she does give up work then there will be a big gap on her cv too.

zzzLazyDaisy

marywooyeah wrote: »

my husband does not give me any money and I pay the bills

Have I misunderstood? He is working, and has a home, a student wife, and a child, but doesn't contribute towards the cost of feeding and clothing you and your child, or the cost of the bills? Please tell me I have got the wrong end of the stick here?

Phil3822

More helpful posts with thanks. We are so torn. I have found this thread challenging in some ways which is good in terms of the decision making process. Wife has recently had a few knocks in terms of business from losing profit and members due to competition plus she has had an unpleasent customer who has caused some issues and stress.

I must admit when in a difficult situtation I often find myself trying to run away which in this sense means my wish for maybe my wife to gve up work. This is something I am trying to balance with reason.

Darlyd

Awe I feel for you all, We are also in a predicament, DH works day, he comes home same time as DD1 (dd2 starts full day sept) And then I go straight out to work, and I work alternative weekends all day. It's horrible, but I just could not afford to give it up .

Can I ask what type of diet your wife is in? I know a friend of mine dealt with a meal replacement and she had some tricky customers and competition, so ended up stopping it. She did it at the right time, jobs were ripe, and ended up with a 10-2 job, around the kids.

Family time is so important, I hate working my hours.

If you can afford it, then go for it. But things could change in the future, where your wife may need to find a part time job for extra income. Have a google Arise working from home, then callcatcherz. I think I might do this again.

ciderwithrosie_2

Is this the only work your wife can do? What about working in a school or college, get the holidays to be with the children? Have you got a hospital near you, usually a variety of jobs going there.
I don't think giving up work completely would be a good thing.

It may seem like on paper you can manage financially but what happens when an unexpected bill comes in - car, new washing machine etc. Kids get dearer as they get older too.

I think if your wife were to have a job with set hours and she didn't have to bring work home with her then life may feel a little less chaotic.

Phil3822

Thanks darlyd, I am sure we are not alone in our thoughts. We seem to have little family time and the time we do have tends to leave us thinking about the next job or what to do with my wifes work. Jobs are not ripe around here though. My wife has seen a full time job she would really like to do but it involves shifts and weekend work. Although the pay is pretty good I dont think we could fine a childcare provider that looks after children till 8pm. Not only that it'snot fair on the children and we would have even less time together. We would have more money but money is not everything in life.

Phil3822

ciderwithrose, thanks for your response. Wife is a qualified nursary assistant/supervisor although there seems to be very few jobs around here that are not full time. Wife would like to work in a school as a teaching assistant but again very few positions available which is a shame as part time would suit well.

Darlyd

Phil3822 wrote: »

ciderwithrose, thanks for your response. Wife is a qualified nursary assistant/supervisor although there seems to be very few jobs around here that are not full time. Wife would like to work in a school as a teaching assistant but again very few positions available which is a shame as part time would suit well.

WOW all she needs to do it call the local school's and nurseries and see if there is a position coming available. I know there are a few in my area advertising.

Good luck though, I know how hard a decision you are making, We need to make one too, If I don't get accepted for the many job application forms I have sent off. Just can't keep on living like this, I will never see DD2 as I go straight to work when kids get in, and she be in bed when I come home.