Help with working this out please

FatVonD

I think you should trust your instincts, you know something's not right or you'd not have started the thread. Probably best to just walk away though I do love the idea of proving to him that he's been rumbled!

babyfruitella

Having been in a relationship with someone, whilst also having a relationship with a married man, I can confirm its entirely possible to spend the night with someone & meet up several times a month, if not several times a week with the other partner being none the wiser. It does sound very much like hes married or in a relationship to me. I personally would have to be straight to the point & just come out & ask him.

JadedAngel88

Just thought I'd post a little update on this if anyone is interested. Its took me 8 months to find out that he isn't married. He, in his own words, is a 'free spirit' and always has been and doesnt want commitment. I personnally think that is a load of old tosh and his 'free spirit' is probably sat at home looking after the kids. Anyway this was just to update. Thanks for the advice before, oh and I did manage to find an address for him, was a 2 bed flat.

Sambucus_Nigra

Did you get rid or are you still in a relationship with him?

JadedAngel88

Im not doing either, he just text me at the minute, though not after 5pm or at the weekend, pmsl, some free spirit eh?.

Sambucus_Nigra

JadedAngel88 wrote: »

Im not doing either, he just text me at the minute, though not after 5pm or at the weekend, pmsl, some free spirit eh?.

Sorry - but I think it's rather pathetic! Surely you deserve a tad more than that.

Tiddlywinks

JadedAngel88 wrote: »

Im not doing either, he just text me at the minute, though not after 5pm or at the weekend, pmsl, some free spirit eh?.

Let's face it, if he wants you to avoid normal family hours then the chances are he's in a relationship.

How many threads on here recently have been started by wives or Gfs whose partners have been 'cheating' over the internet or by text? Those posters felt hurt and upset - the lack of physical contact made no major difference to their feelings of betrayal.

So, I'm not impressed with the 'pmsl' view you seem to have of this situation - if he is in a relationship then you ARE the 'other woman'. Why are you comfortable with that?

Anyway, why not be a bit braver and have a real relationship in the real world rather than live forever in a cyber / text bubble.

FBaby

I am totally amazed that after all this time, you haven't asked more questions, or having gone deeper into your investigation. Curiosity would certainly have got the better of me.

Are you really saying that after more than 2 years together, him never contacting you (or even seeing you?) after 5pm and the weekends, you still don't know much about his life? You've never been to his flat? When do you see each other? During the day?At your place? Surely you haven't accepted this for all this time? If so, please give it up right away. Whether he is married or not is not even the most important matter now, what is is that he is only prepared to give you so little and you take it with so little in return.

meritaten

never mind if he is married, looking after a sick father, or anything - after TWO years you know NOTHING about this man! you, hun, are being kept a secret and that bodes nothing but ill!
This relationship is not normal - and that is what worries you isnt it? with good reason.
up to you what you do now - can you continue it? or do you want more? then it is up to you to force the relationship to either come out into the open - or find why you need to end it. I suspect that it needs to be ended and that the reason you havent 'investigated' your friend further - is you suspect the relationship will end.

JadedAngel88

Tiddlywinks wrote: »

.
So, I'm not impressed with the 'pmsl' view you seem to have of this situation - if he is in a relationship then you ARE the 'other woman'. Why are you comfortable with that?
.

Sorry didnt mean to offend:)

I havent been in a relationship with him for 2 years, I havent had a anything with him, I suppose its my own sad fault, I have been single and lonely for 8 years and I suppose any bit of affection is better than none at all.