"Simply not solvent!

tyllwyd

Are you using Word? If I want to make tables bigger, I usually select the table, then use Format - Paragraph - and change the spacing. Or you could do it using Table - Table Properties.

tyllwyd

Seaxwyn wrote: »

... I rang IR to get confirmation but they haven't processed my form yet.

I was just thinking - do you do your tax return yourself? Are you registered for self-assessment online? I've been doing it that way for the last few years, and it seems to work pretty well, and it gives you an instant calculation of your tax bill once you've submitted the form online. You can also check your account, and see how much tax you've paid on account for this tax year etc.

Seaxwyn

Hi tyllwyd, I have a bit of a phobia about doing things online and do my tax return on paper. I figure it's much easier to type a figure wrong than to write it - and any mistakes on a written document jump out at me. I have got records of what I've paid on account, but as my self-employed earnings for 07-08 were much higher than 06-07 (when I did some PAYE work as well) the earnings on account are much smaller.

taxi73

Hi Seaxwyn..the soya desserts (the ones on shelves have a really long life)...the soya yoghurts in the fridge have quite a short life.Hope that helps.

chevalier

Seaxwyn wrote: »

Hi Chev, certainly I will have a look at the Alpro Soya Desserts. I once got given two big boxes by a health food shop because they had passed their sell-by date - don't tell your local shop that of course!

Thanks Seax I appreciate it.

I despise Bernard Matthews and the type of 'farming' that he represents, debate has been raging here about whether we can lower ourselves (the whole family is required to be in the ad). And, I'm ashamed to say, we have come down in favour of the old arms dealer's excuse that 'if we don't do it someone else will', and trusting that our involvement won't have the least impact on BM's sales, we are putting ourselves forward.

I guess it was serendipitous that the sleep over was the same day. Fate was making sure you didn't compromise your beliefs. Though I like Karmacats idea of taking their negative money to use it for positive purposes.

Has my outlook shifted? I think so. I've had a gazillion lightbulb moments about the need to raise my game as a freelance or get a job, but I think finally I'm prepared to accept that I do have to change.:T :T :T :j :j :j . I am not sure that you necessarily have to change THAT much, just follow through on what you 'know' you have to do. Like not letting OH get away with putting off things HE HAS TO DO. Like making sure that he supports you when you HAVE to work. Far too often you don't call him on it. Ie he says he will do x y z with the kids so that you can get on and then doesn't. You just fume and don't get the work done. So BE MORE ASSERTIVE:eek: .

Whether OH's outlook has shifted, I can't say. There have been encouraging signs. quote] OH doesn't have to change, BUT he also doesn't have to hold you back either. I don't know if there is a difference in your ages, but if he is older, what the hell is he going to do for a pension, or you for that matter. THAT is one of the reasons that I would be working mine and his proverbials off if it were me. The thought of HAVING to work well into your 60's or even 70's rather than relaxing, would be a very BIG motivator in sorting things out.

We all have faith that you can do this. Every time you start to flag, just think of the extra time you can spend with your children when you have even half this debt.

Sorry for being outspoken but you need to tell OH that this is going to happen from the beginning of term too. He has to know that NOW is the time for him to really front up and support you, so that you can really earn.

chev

lucielle

Morning Seaxwyn, Can you not get a PAYE job and still do freelance stuff as well?
L

Seaxwyn

I’ve updated my signature – our debt reduced by £592.79 in August. But that means nothing as I only managed to save £86 towards my January tax bill – which is looming ever larger in my mind. I’ve got a chart pinned up on the kitchen notice board with a pathetic 11 out of 163 boxes coloured in.

I’ve been doing lots of thinking and have shifted perspective a bit. I’ve found coming on here increasingly depressing – largely because I’m not paying off debts anywhere near as fast as most of my MSE friends. I want to take a new approach, which relegates money concerns to much lower in my mental hierarchy.

Getting debt-free isn’t a goal in itself, it’s just a means to be able to do other things that are important. The two things that are really important are my family – giving my children the best possible start in life – and work – reclaiming some of the pride and pleasure I used to get out of work.

I’ll start a new diary soon (when I haven’t had two glasses of wine) – but my aims from now on are not to focus on money and numbers but

• to give my children the attention and basic things they need - such as a tidy house where they can find their stuff and invite their friends round
• to see my OH as an ally and not an obstacle (sure he's got his foibles but I'm stuck with him for better or worse)
• to sort out my attitude to work so that I can still do the things I enjoy, lose the parts I don’t enjoy, and earn at least 25% more (so that I can save for tax)

hypno06

That sounds like an excellent approach. The money (or lack of) is only one part of life, and it is easy for us to lose sight of that fact when we are so consumed in paying it off.

Getting debt free is the end result of that one part that we are working towards, but along the way, making the books balance a bit more, making reserves for tax, charging the appropriate amounts for our time and efforts etc all overlap/spill over into the other areas of our lives making them less stressful and more achievable in return.

But still they are not the be all and end all......they are just part of what we are doing - we are mums, we are partners, we are bloody good at our jobs......we just also happen to be crap at money (and housework!).........x

And anyway, 11 boxes is a pretty good start!!!

Karmacat

Seaxwyn, I think thats absolutely the right thing to do - I've driven myself crazy recently with debtbusting - today, when I got to see the town centre for a while (even if it was on a mystery shop) and also had some time in the garden, I felt like I'd got out of prison. Thats also why I've just paid out for dance classes, to feel human again.

mizmir

Seaxwyn wrote: »

Getting debt-free isn’t a goal in itself, it’s just a means to be able to do other things that are important. The two things that are really important are my family – giving my children the best possible start in life – and work – reclaiming some of the pride and pleasure I used to get out of work.

Absolutely! It can't become the be all and end all to become debt free - there are many more important things in life and the debt is simply one of the things we need to deal with or manage along the way. And you are doing that - the debt is going down.

Don't worry about what anyone else is doing. The other day I was at a talk about coaching and support and the guy (who coached the UK athletics team) talked about one instance where he moved the team from 4th to 1st. They were scored on a points system (8 for 1st place, 1 for 8th) and he asked each member of the squad to get one more point. So the guy who'd come in as reserve was asked to try to be 7th rather than 8th. Someone expected to be 4th was aiming for 3rd. And the world record holder favourite had to make sure they did actually win! They all delivered - one or two points - and it worked. And so the fact the team won was down to every one of them! The point - he'd asked them to take ownership of their own mountain - not of anyone else's. Don't get down because you perceive you're not doing as well as some one else - you don't measure against someone else - you do what is right for you. What matters is to work out what your "mountain" is - what you expect of you in your circumstance and with your priorities - and if you want a challenge try for one better.

Hope that makes some sense!