Nice people thread part 4 - sugar and spice and all things

silvercar

I was talking to a local teacher on a sink estate a couple of weeks ago. She was saying that schools are now really good at getting kids with English as a second language on board and getting them applying hard. The problem now is with white kids from poor families who just aren't motivated to apply themselves. I'd say that the problem kids that I meet fall into this category too. I just don't understand where their drive has gone in the 30 years since I went to the same school. It's bizarre. I said before, the kids I'd see revising hard were the ones wearing the hijab or the black kids with African parents, or the kids who'd break off and speak in Polish. I don't know how you reverse that but I do know something needs to be done.

I found this when I worked in FE 10 years ago. The good students who had a reason to have ended up in FE (rather than HE, apprentices, work etc) either were recent immigrants or had had family disruptions or poor health or in some cases were p1ss poor. The students that were a pain in the @rse, disruptive and difficult were what I can only describe as trash - stereotypical council estate loud hooligans. Once they were excluded from the class, the rest of the group were keen learners.

To clarify the group I call p1ss poor had suffered at school because their poverty meant that they couldn't afford one or more of essential stationary, transport to school, extras like geog field trips at history outings, possibly shoes or uniform at times. Let alone extra text books, revision aids, photocopying. They probably didn't have Internet at home.

michaels

I had time to listen to Duran Duran when I was a we lad but somehow I had imagined you listing to AC/DC and DIO?

SingleSue wrote: »

...and could then dream about John Taylor (Duran Duran) for the rest of it.
.....

LydiaJ

SingleSue wrote: »

So although my current status is as one of the 'poor' people, my views are the same as most middle class parents....and consequently, the boy's views are the same. It confuses the life out of some people, a parent on benefits with active support of education and with children who also support education who also then convert that into good results....it completely beggers up the stereotypical views of some!

Sue, your views are the same as most middle class parents because you are a middle class parent. If you were middle class when you were married, working full time and hadn't had any kids yet, then you're still middle class now. Your circumstances may have changed, but who you are hasn't. And your boys are likely to resemble you.

The first list [of things that are correlated with academic achievement in children] describes things that parents are; the second list [of things that aren't correlated with it] describes things that parents do. Parents who are well educated, successful, and healthy tend to have children who test well in school; but it doesn't seem to much matter whether a child is trotted off to museums or spanked or sent to Head Start or frequently read to or plopped in front of the television.
Freakonomics, Levitt & Dubner

SingleSue

Nah, up until I was 14/15 ish, I was poptastic...cringe worthy so. In 1982/3, I could tell my friends what record was at what number in the charts, how long it had been there, if it had gone up or down that week etc.

I liked Duran Duran a little but was very much more into Haircut 100, Howard Jones and Nik Kershaw....but John Taylor was gorgeous and just so swoony (or so I thought back then), I used to kiss his little picture I had put up on my wall every night before I went to sleep (oh gawd, how sad do I sound!)

neverdespairgirl

Generali wrote: »

When I was ill (excepting measles etc) I went to school.

That's my Dad's normal attitude to health. There are two states of well-being - healthy, and in hospital.

SingleSue

LydiaJ wrote: »

Sue, your views are the same as most middle class parents because you are a middle class parent. If you were middle class when you were married, working full time and hadn't had any kids yet, then you're still middle class now. Your circumstances may have changed, but who you are hasn't. And your boys are likely to resemble you.

[/I]

Well, that is my argument but the amount of people on MSE or in RL who believe those on benefits cannot be middle class (or anything other than scum class or underclass), is staggering.

I was born middle class, I had a middle class upbringing, a middle class education, middle class views and until quite recently, a middle class life but some would prefer to see just the last few years and judge on that.

neverdespairgirl

chewmylegoff wrote: »

It's fine...if you can afford it. I'm likely to ceiling at about £100k in about 2-3 years. On one salary it's going to really be a push to bring up more than one kid because there is no way any child of mine is going through the London state school system - so that means moving significantly further out, or private school (plus you need to save a serious wedge for university).

Why one salary, necessarily? Would your wife (whoever she might turn out to be) not work?

silvercar wrote: »

I think OH is good for me, in that I am a more balanced and stronger person by being with him. Previously I had relationships that were too one sided and didn't do one or other of us any good for ourselves.

OH is my only "proper" relationship, so I don't have a lot to compare it wtih. I know, though, I'm both happier and a better person being with him that otherwise.

SingleSue

neverdespairgirl wrote: »

That's my Dad's normal attitude to health. There are two states of well-being - healthy, and in hospital.

It was mine and now ex hubbies too...

He took it a little far though when he caught chickenpox off James, he was all set to go into work until his boss told him to do something very naughty and not to come back until he was no longer infectious.

His boss had never had chickenpox :rotfl:

neverdespairgirl

silvercar wrote: »

Radio:

Capital in the mornings, though Johnny Vaughan@s departure may change that.

Mostly Radio 4 for us.

I have become my parents.

PasturesNew

Had some time over this week to discuss our upbringing with the sibs.... it appears mother was a bone idle bad mother. We never had breakfast, for example, she was still in bed until long after we'd left for school; nothing was ever encouraged/supported; there was no space to do homework as we only had a coal fire and table in one room and that was "the room", so everything else was going on there (like eating tea on the table). It's a wonder we weren't taken away, although I know at one point I nearly was.