Fec kless teenager!!! So mad at my son!

relic

1echidna wrote: »

See post #68

Yes, and?

What has that got to do with my post?

I'll admit I haven't read anything but the OP, but it's simple, I was the same at some points and being made to pay for a few small bills a month made it worth it.

Good to see you're still contributing nothing to any threads on here.

ska_lover

Person_one wrote: »

Right, that's just what the poor vulnerable residents need, f_ckless teenage carers who don't give a damn.

And people are surprised at what goes on in care homes.

I don't agree with you. Some teenagers do infact, give a damn -or they learn to.

My lad was a bit of a slob to put it politely, but this gradually changed when managed to get a job in a local care home for adults with learning difficulties. While I always felt he would be good at this type of work, he has excelled beyond expectation and has been given a wage rise since he has been there. The manager there is very pleased with him, (I speak to her in passing as she lives local to me). However it has also opened his eyes that he does actually want more from his working life than not much more than minimum wage, and has saved up and paid for an access to teaching course which he starts soon.

It does seem to take lads a bit of time to get to grips with the real world, but I believe with the right guidance - even tough love - they will get there. You can always find something that works with them if you look hard enough and persist long enough.

1echidna

relic wrote: »

Yes, and?

What has that got to do with my post?

I'll admit I haven't read anything but the OP, but it's simple, I was the same at some points and being made to pay for a few small bills a month made it worth it.

Good to see you're still contributing nothing to any threads on here.

Which comes first I wonder - tough love - or kids on min wage?

elisebutt65

I can see this is is going to degenerate into the usual MSE; 'You're a cruddy parent because you don't/do this the way I would', or just hurling abuse left, right and centre because school finished last week and the kiddies are out to play.

Thank you ever so much to the posters who criticized constructively and gave support.


I'll leave this post alone now as I have cooled down somewhat from Saturday. DS1 just got his payslip for 2 hours induction that he wasn't expecting, and is now feeling somewhat foolish:o

ska_lover

elisebutt65 wrote: »

I can see this is is going to degenerate into the usual MSE; 'You're a cruddy parent because you don't/do this the way I would', or just hurling abuse left, right and centre because school finished last week and the kiddies are out to play.

Thank you ever so much to the posters who criticized constructively and gave support.


I'll leave this post alone now as I have cooled down somewhat from Saturday. DS1 just got his payslip for 2 hours induction that he wasn't expecting, and is now feeling somewhat foolish:o

You are quite right, threads often degenerate in that way these days. They are just keyboard warriors with too much time on their hands and a HUGE chip on their shoulder. Complete wimps in real life, but put them behind a keyboard and - WOAAH watch out!!

You are doing a great job with your lad. You care and that is the main thing. You will get there - never give up hope. However much teenagers make you feel like pulling your hair out - they will come good in the end. Wish someone had said that to me two years ago! hahaha

January20

elisebutt65 wrote: »

I can see this is is going to degenerate into the usual MSE; 'You're a cruddy parent because you don't/do this the way I would', or just hurling abuse left, right and centre because school finished last week and the kiddies are out to play.

Thank you ever so much to the posters who criticized constructively and gave support.


I'll leave this post alone now as I have cooled down somewhat from Saturday. DS1 just got his payslip for 2 hours induction that he wasn't expecting, and is now feeling somewhat foolish:o

In a past few days, I have read a few posts written by DSM and they never seem to have anything nice or useful to say and always seem to be so negative and aggressive. I wouldn't worry about such posters Elise! Another one for my ignore list! That will be 6. never had so many on ignore!

It's brilliant that your father is giving your son some work to do and that he will spend some time with his grand-parents. Away from his friends, games and the Internet he might end up spending some really good quality time with them. Even if he doesn't realise it straight away

Person_one

ska_lover wrote: »

I don't agree with you. Some teenagers do infact, give a damn -or they learn to.

My lad was a bit of a slob to put it politely, but this gradually changed when managed to get a job in a local care home for adults with learning difficulties. While I always felt he would be good at this type of work, he has excelled beyond expectation and has been given a wage rise since he has been there. The manager there is very pleased with him, (I speak to her in passing as she lives local to me). However it has also opened his eyes that he does actually want more from his working life than not much more than minimum wage, and has saved up and paid for an access to teaching course which he starts soon.

It does seem to take lads a bit of time to get to grips with the real world, but I believe with the right guidance - even tough love - they will get there. You can always find something that works with them if you look hard enough and persist long enough.

I wasn't meaning to castigate all teenagers, I was one myself not all that long ago (sort of ) I was responding to the idea that a teenager who has shown himself to be unreliable, untrustworthy and yes, f_ckless should be sent off to work with vulnerable adults as some sort of life lesson.

The residents deserve better than to be used like that, and don't even get me started on the fact that caring for others is considered a dead end job and only pays minimum wage!

euronorris

dirtysexymonkey wrote: »

im just glad i have parents who supported me. your kid doesnt. and my grandparents didnt put me to work when i stayed. your kids do. i feel so sorry for him. and for you because when you need his help when your old he might do the same to you.:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

Is that a serious post?????

Part of being supportive is giving you a kick up the @ss when you need one.

That's how I was brought up and I adore my parents! They will be well looked after by me and my siblings when the time comes.

dirtysexymonkey

euronorris wrote: »

Is that a serious post?????

Part of being supportive is giving you a kick up the @ss when you need one.

That's how I was brought up and I adore my parents! They will be well looked after by me and my siblings when the time comes.

stockholm syndrome? if my granddad had demanded that i visit him and do hard labour for 40 hours a week for far below the minimum wage then not only would he receive short shrift from me but i doubt hed survive the conversation with my parents. if he asked then i would help for free but forcing someone is no way to go on. certainly not when the poor lads father cant be bothered to support him!

euronorris

dirtysexymonkey wrote: »

stockholm syndrome? if my granddad had demanded that i visit him and do hard labour for 40 hours a week for far below the minimum wage then not only would he receive short shrift from me but i doubt hed survive the conversation with my parents. if he asked then i would help for free but forcing someone is no way to go on. certainly not when the poor lads father cant be bothered to support him!

Stockholm syndrome? :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:No, it's just called 'You live in my house, you live by my rules.'.

And I can tell you, most teenagers require firm guidance. Working hard, and earning your keep is part of that.

He can either stay at home, do nothing and be treated like a child in every sense of the word. Or, if he wants to be treated like an adult, he can start acting like one. Working full time, at his grandad's whilst getting lodgings, food and a small salary is a pretty good deal IMO. If you're gonna harp on about it being minimum wage, I suggest you bother to work out the cost of his share of the bills and food first.

And I would say that it is exactly because his father isn't around, that he requires the influence of his grandad.

OP - I would offer your support and let him know that you will help him where you can, but it is up to him to ensure he's there on time, does a good job and pays you some keep.