Frugal Frump to Fab/Winter Solstice

Bitsy_Beans

Welcome Caterina

LL hugs for you xxx what a t w u n t :mad: am seething at the emotional blackmail used on you.

You'd all be proud. I finally bought some rubber gloves. I slathered on some hand cream just before I did the washing up and let the heat do it's work. However all this will be undone if I don't start wearing some winter gloves :o

Not much other fabbing going on, have broken about 3 nails so I need to drastically file down the others. I hate having different length nails a night of setting my teeth on edge doing that then :rotfl:

lessonlearned

Thanks everyone for all you kind comments.

Sophistica thanks for your pm. I will definitely use some of this should the need arise. I understand your reasoning for saying not to have OH home for Christmas - it's sound logic.

I've wrestled with this over and over. I know this may sound weak but I just can't do it. I really want him home for Christmas - he would be in the depths of despair if he couldn't be home.

I know that we will have similar issues re birthdays, anniversaries etc but I am hoping that time will help soften the blow and we can resolve any issues surrounding such occasions.

The home has said we can take our own furniture etc and my intention is to create a "bedsit" type of arrangement for him so that not only will he be more comfortable but I can spend time with him in a comfortable "home" environment rather than a "hospital" type room.

Yes he will need a profiling bed, but I aim to take such things as a wardrobe, chest of drawers, desk and maybe a small sofa bed or comfy armchair for me. His own towels, bedlinen, curtains, pictures, lamps, TV, DVD player, I-Pod, kettle and cafetiere, a folding chair for sitting outside when the weather permits. All the comforts of home.:)

My aim is to make a home from home for him and with some of my things too. A small selection of bits for hand sewing or embroidery, a few of my books and magazines, so that I can just sit and "be" with him as I would at home - rather than "visiting" as you would in hospital. I think if I leave some of my things dotted around it will make him feel less "abandoned".

That's the plan anyway.

Sparkles - well done on keeping up the momentum. I'm sure you will look wonderful for your Christmas works do. Bitsy - well done on the rubber gloves. Know what you mean about winter gloves. When I filled up the car on Monday my hands were freezing.

It's been seriously cold here today - I think snow is on the way.

Watched Kirsties Homemade Christmas whilst writing my Christmas Cards. All the posting ones now done.

I was hoping to do all my Christmas shopping whilst OH was in respite, however, because of my back I've not even made a start. Oh well what doesn't get done won't get done. As long as we're together and have some nice eats the rest is irrelevant. I've got the boys a couple of things to open on the day but they aren't really bothered about "stuff".

We tend to make Christmas more of a getting together occasion and we make more of a fuss for individual birthdays. The birthday boy or girl gets to be King or Queen for the day, choosing where to go for a treat, what to eat etc.

Have spent a lot of time trying to come up with a care plan - struggling with this. The agencies are pretty much hopeless so it looks like it's all hands on deck for the family.

Had some shocking news about OH's PA. She has been looking unwell for some time and finally went to her GP - she has a growth in her abdomen:eek::eek: Tests next Monday. We've grown very fond of her, she's almost become a daughter figure. She's only 42.:( Fingers crossed like mad that it's not malignant.

Anyway off to bed shortly.

I know you'll understand me when I say this - in many ways I'll be glad when this particular phase of our lives is over. I know the New Year will be challenging but once the dust is settled I'm sure things will be better in 2012.

G'night all x

sophistica

Nearly at the year end! This year I decided that instead of going round my problems I was going to go THROUGH them. So this year, I have:
1. Won a court case against relating to one of my properties
2. Finished a long negotiation with HMRC over my brother's issues
3. Got my mother into a nursing home
4. Renovated 3 properties
5. Made 5 multimedia programmes
6. Supported my father through cataract surgery
7. Cleared out about 4 skips worth of junk from my parents properties.
8. Made a billion applications for Day Centres, Meals on Wheels, Pension Credit, Care funding, Disabled Badges, Community Transport

All I can say is I am so thankful that 2011 is almost over. In the New Year it is all going to be about me, me, me. I want new friends, new hobbies, a new figure, a new life and preferably dementia so I can forget this year. I am going to be SELFISH! I have made a start already, my uncle wants to come down and stay so he can see my mother before Christmas but I can say this, it isn't going to happen. I am not doing OVERNIGHT GUESTS, transport and cooking. Nope, they can wait to the New Year.

When I was 30, I was a dress size 12, only wore Nicole Fahri and Paul Costelloe, worn film star red lipstick, wore Yves Saint Laurent and Christian Dior make-up and wrote with an ink pen and green ink? What I want to know is WHAT HAPPENED?

lessonlearned

sophistica wrote: »

t


When I was 30, I was a dress size 12, only wore Nicole Fahri and Paul Costelloe, worn film star red lipstick, wore Yves Saint Laurent and Christian Dior make-up and wrote with an ink pen and green ink? What I want to know is WHAT HAPPENED?

Life happened.:rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:

You've achieved an incredible amount in 2011 so pat yourself on the back for a job well done.

You've more than done your duty as a daughter, a little more self care for 2012 isn't being selfish - it's self preservation. If you don't take care of yourself no-one else will.

I know I often quote my dear old Aunty S - sorry to be such a bore - it's just that she was like a mother to me when my own mother was too ill or self-absorbed to be much help. I valued her counsel on many an occasion.

Aunty S used to say "You are born alone and you die alone, in the in-between times you may be lucky and acquire a family and friends, but essentially it's up to you. Only you are responsible for you. You need to stand on your own two feet and be self-reliant and what ever you do, do not rely on the State to help you. It won't"

Wise words.

So yes Sophistica make 2012 the year you fight back and reclaim your life for you. We will all be joining you and yes -

It will be fabulous :D:D

maman

Definitely a quick post!

LL, I was wondering if you told SS that you had 'visitors' over at Christmas that could help with DH day and night (i.e.DSs) then it would allow you to have him home without SS thinking you could manage on a permanent basis. Just a thought.

Feel free to rant bratz, it must be very difficult for you. I suppose people think they're being kind but it doesn't help.

Did my fabbing today as promised. Filed my feet, creamed them, OCM, shower, intensive hair conditioning the works! Wow, did it feel good.

Managed a bit of Christmas shopping in town this afternoon although most of it is courtesy of Amazon.

It's my weigh-in tomorrow sparkles, and I'm hoping to have kept gain to a minimum. I don't feel much different and everything still fits but I know I've not been eating as well as I should. Looking forward to a good lunch out tomorrow but that's after being weighed so it won't count!:D

Sleep well all.

Molly41

Hugs to you all and just to let you know that you are all in my thoughts.

LL that SS official:mad::mad::mad: I wish people could be taught how to be compassionate but it comes from the heart and is what is wrong with many of the professional carers that we come across in this day and age.

Sorry not much to say from me. I am struggling. I was very moved by Lizzie's post and have realised that she sums up what I have been feeling regarding Christmas. I usually love it but have been unable to face decorating my tree despite it having been up for two weeks nearly. It is sat in the living room sparkling at me but no decorations yet.

I have however kept up my Fab routines and am taking care to dress nicely. Even if I do end up back in my PJs later in the day:rotfl::rotfl: (But I have made sure my pjs are colour co-ordinated and ironed - so that counts!)

lessonlearned

Molly41 wrote: »

Sorry not much to say from me. I am struggling.

)

Me too - can't tell you how awful I feel today - backache, headache, joint pain, stomach upset, chest pains - it's all stress related I know.

I just want it all to go away. Sorry:o

Hugs to you Molly and to all that need them.

Lizzie - meant to say glad to hear that you've finally got your counselling - good luck with that.

Re not remembering till afterwards, yes I think writing it all down would help.

Do you keep a journal at all. When Oh was so dangerously ill and in hospital for 4 months I kept a journal through those dark days. Purely for me to record things that were happening, how I felt.

Going back and reading it again - they were dark days indeed and I'm not sure how I got through them. Maybe I need to start the journal again - although in some ways writing on here is my journal.

You won't be surprised to hear that my fabbing routines have completely fallen by the wayside, I manage to bathe each day, wash and style my hair most days, and dress reasonably well - that's about it.

No exercise but I do try and eat as sensibly as I can. Stocked up on fruit and veg yesterday.

Everything seems to be one huge effort at the moment.

Anyway off to have my bath, then OH's PA is kindly picking me up and driving me to see him for a little while.

Sorry it's such a wingey whiney post - I'm sure there is light at the end of this tunnel - it's just that I can't see it at the moment.:o

Bye for now x

Bitsy_Beans

Hugs for everyone that's struggling. It's that time of year, dark nights, cold weather, end of the year......and for some of you it's been a long hard slog.
However stress is REALLY bad for you so I would suggest that you practice letting these feelings go. Sounds deceptively simple doesn't it but we grow into adults hanging on to emotions. If you look at kids they are happy, it's passes, they are sad, it passes too. Emotions are not meant to last, they come and they ebb away. So I try and enjoy the happiness moments and the sad, stressful moments I accept and pack 'em on a boat and let them drift away. Sure they come back (as do the good moments) BUT the point is I don't carry around the baggage all the time. I am by no means an expert at this but it's what I try to practice. Anyway food for thought.

Not much extra fabbing, trying to remember taking make up off at night, still putting on coconut oil on legs and perfume in morning. Even wore my ski gloves to do the school run this morning Did a couple of yoga stretches last night. I can't even touch my toes properly so enoughs enough. Time to spend less time online in the evenings (very easy with my lightweight and portable ipad ) but once DS has gone off to sleep doing some yoga is a must. I am so inflexible it's shocking

Off out tomorrow night with the girls. Shan't be dressing up massively, jeans and a nice top. I am also giving in and wearing comfortable boots But that does mean I'll be able to boogie for longer I will have half an hour to get ready!!!! to do hair and makeup......can I do it?! We will have to see.

Molly41

Lesson Learned - really hoping that you are feeling better today. I agree with Bitsy that longterm stress is very bad for you x

I have been very anxious today and have tried to keep it under control. Really hope that it is just a short-term thing but it does tend to overtake me some days.

I have painted my nails with some sparkly nail polish. Im hoping it will distract me as i tend to pick them when nervous. I hope the sparkle will make me think twice.

Sending you all my support xx

fedupandskint

Hair treatment done and hair mask this morning before work then a double cleanse and exfoliate and face mask this evening after work. Just about to tackle my nails and sort out my make up for the mad dash getting ready to go tomorrow.

Plus, had a little shuffle about on a different set of scales at work to get weighed - might be at the target weight - I came in there! But I'll confirm tomorrow for deffo!