How to deal with people like this?

1jim

Book and Ipod for me Im afraid, or laptop and do some work listening to ipod so she can see you are busy, a few weeks of this and she will have moved on

Sambucus_Nigra

I'd go with the 'give it a rest luv - your little digs and insults are less than tedious and very very dull. Or go park your butt elsewhere' line.

Greenlight77

I'd just take a book next time and if she tries to talk to you, say sorry you can't chat as you're in a book club and you're trying to finish the book in time before your next meeting. It may be a white lie but it's a good excuse to politely avoid having to chat to someone you don't want to.

warehouse

meritaten wrote: »

forThe way some of you have responded and the awful things you say to do, my bet is not one of you would actually DO them - just 'bigging' yourselves up!

Exactly this! Keyboard warrioirs are all over this thread. Unbelievable replies and we all know not a single one of these brave people would do any of their own suggestions in a million years!

OP, the best one on this thread, (if you can't change lessons), is to send your Husband for a few weeks. Good luck on Saturday.

the_cat

Seriously, she is not important enough to need 'dealing' with!

The idea that you might change your arrangements and get oh to take dd, or sit elsewhere, or actually do or say anything is giving her a sight more importance than she deserves.

She is a silly little woman who you don't like, don't need and don't care about. Why on earth would you do anything at all.... just ignore her stupid witterings. You have already come to the conclusion that she is an idiot, so why would her ramblings matter one way or another?

OrkneyStar

Is there a friend who might come along with you one session....chat to her- maybe avidly about something you are both involved in ?
Or music is a good idea.
I would take my knitting and say politely about needing to get this bit done and swimming is the only chance I get lol!

mazinmouse

Charlies_Mummy wrote: »

I know she's probably like this because she's a hugely insecure person, but what is the best way to deal with people like this?

If you have realised this is an insecure woman then I am sure you have enough kindness/humanity in you to handle this in an intelligent way and without making the woman feel bad about herself and her daughter's achievements.

Charlies_Mummy

mazinmouse wrote: »

If you have realised this is an insecure woman then I am sure you have enough kindness/humanity in you to handle this in an intelligent way and without making the woman feel bad about herself and her daughter's achievements.

I like to think that I've been doing this already. Despite the fact that she's tried to make me feel bad about myself and my daughter's opinions.

Thanks everyone for the replies, I'll keep you all posted about how it goes on Saturday. I plan to take a book with me this week, and to do my best to avoid her, whilst remaining polite.

meritaten

Charlies_Mummy wrote: »

Coming back to your post as I've been thinking about it and I actually feel a bit annoyed that you think I'm being unreasonable by not wanting to listen to this woman's blatent nastiness. Yes, the lesson is only half an hour but why the heck should I have to listen to someone putting down my child and I and generally making me feel bad, for that half hour?

And as for the fact that you would "think I was a horrible person" if I did some of the suggestions on here, well to be honest as I don't know you it really doesn't bother me what you think of me. As it happens, I am a decent person, who behaves in an adult way, and I wouldn't do anything rude or nasty. However I have rights too, as does everyone else, and it's my perogative to choose not to put up with someone who makes me feel bad.

People can only make you feel bad if you let them.

You make the point that as you dont know me what I think doesnt bother you. Fair enough - but why post on an open forum then? If you didnt want others opinions, why did you post? Or did you just want us all to agree with you that sitting by you and making conversation was beyond the pale! does it not occur to you that it may be the womans intention wasnt to put your child down - but its YOUR perception of it? some people are just very negative except when it comes to their own offspring.
bowing out of the thread now as I dont think you are very nice person anyway - sounds to me like you have made up your mind about this other poor lady. I pity her!

Charlies_Mummy

meritaten wrote: »

People can only make you feel bad if you let them.

You make the point that as you dont know me what I think doesnt bother you. Fair enough - but why post on an open forum then? If you didnt want others opinions, why did you post? Or did you just want us all to agree with you that sitting by you and making conversation was beyond the pale! does it not occur to you that it may be the womans intention wasnt to put your child down - but its YOUR perception of it? some people are just very negative except when it comes to their own offspring.
bowing out of the thread now as I dont think you are very nice person anyway - sounds to me like you have made up your mind about this other poor lady. I pity her!

I think it's quite unfair to make the assumption that I'm not a very nice person from a thread on a forum. Perhaps it takes one to know one, as you've actually been the only person on this thread that's been unpleasant. Maybe it was just my perception of how this woman came across, but lots of people have agreed on here that she wasn't very nice and the things she said were horrible. And as I have already said on this thread, this woman is unpopular at her workplace and stood on her own at nursery pick ups. This speaks volumes about her IMO.

And yes, you're right; people can only make you feel bad if you let them. Which is why I plan to stay far, far away from this woman and make it obvious that I don't want to listen to her nasty comments. You never know, you might bump into her at a swimming lesson in the near future and as you have made it obvious that you pity the "poor woman" perhaps you would be happy to listen to her put-downs and be her friend...... ;-)