Life is what you make it .......

Horace

I typed something earlier but then the computer shut down for no reason and this is the first time today that I have had chance to say anything.

SA tread carefully with HR - you are not the problem,it is the manager who has little experience in leading a team. I once worked for someone who was not born in the UK - he was a stinker and had zero management skills and he was quite a devious little man. So devious and spiteful that he turned a once confident Horace into gibbering wreck within 3 weeks - I still have days now where I wonder what I am doing and if I have the confidence to speak to people and set up a business I sometimes wonder who I am fooling:(

I am pleased that the electrician has been and the tiler. Hope the Fattys are behaving themselves tonight?

Am feeling a tad sorry for myself today - I went back to the GP yesterday (he did wonder why I had gone to see him - seems I should have made an appointment to see Nursey) to have my stitches removed - he removed them and then discovered that the skin hadn't started to heal:eek: As a result he slapped a dressing on and I had to sit back in the waiting room because he had got me into see Nursey who peeled the dressing off, cleaned the wound, stuck sticky sutures on, then added a massive plaster followed a bandage. I was on my feet a fair bit yesterday and I was doing some driving and noticed that my leg started to hurt - I had gone to a seminar. Well, it would appear that the sutures havent worked either as the leg is still leaking and is now quite painful and sore. I have to go back on Monday afternoon to see Nursey Helen as Nursey Selina is on holiday:( I have no idea what they will do because the skin is rather thin on my leg - I was told yesterday that I shouldnt have insisted that the lump be removed - but I said my leg was better without the lump.

Best sign off I guess..I have to be up early in the morning and will be at work at 7am:eek:

On a good note, I got £40 today as 4 people signed up for my breakfast meets:cool:

Hope things go well at work and that MrT behaves himself - hope he doesnt bury his pigs ears in the sofa (something that my chum's now deceased dog used to do) - you would be sitting on the sofa and put your hand near the cushion so you would feel something damp and decidedly fleshy - it would be the pigs ear that Desmo had buried under the cushion:eek:

startagain_2

OK, I have spoken to HR lady and let's see what happens now. Unlike in the past, I have actually realised that a part time position that involves fuel cost just does not suit me as a person nor is it pratical. Having reached that conclusion I decided to put my cards on the table.
It was a difficult conversation as it was hard trying to keep it away from being about me and the manager/management style. As I suspected, HR lady had thought that the deferrment of the probation review was for different reasons (logistical, rather than personal) and was surprised to find that it was for different reasons.
I explained that all I want to do is pass my probation review so that I can apply for a full time position in another department.
I get the impression that she is reluctant for me to move and would rather I stayed where I am.
I think a joint meeting is going to be arranged for early next week with the three of us present. I asked that a date be set for my probation review and that if it was to be deferred again, the reasons put in writing?
The way I look at it I am in a sort of win/win position - at least it has been brought into the open and if they do decide to let me go, I can go back on JSA and look for something more suited to my skills whilst not being any worse off, financially. I really need to stop beating myself up over things that go wrong. I always presume that I am where fault or blame lays, a result of my rotten childhood I know, but at least I am learning to walk away before the self confidence really hits rock bottom again.
Thank you all for your helpful experiences and advice. I understand now why it is so important to tread carefully with HR - I can see this possibly backfiring on me, but luckily I haven't been there very long and I see it as a step forward on the way to finding a job that really suits me.
Other updates - the socket has been moved and the kitchen is back to normal now the grout and sealant has dried. It is in a much safer position thank heavens.
MrT decided to dig a hole in the garden this morning trying to get under the fence to chase a cat - little wretch. He is sulking now because I told him off!
The Fatty family are being relatively quiet, she is washing and drying as I type - about 3 hours so far - so probably another couple of hours to go. I read an estimate that it costs 40 - 50p an hour to run a dryer, 3 hours a day, 7 days a week = £10.50 a week ....HOW????
Mr F is obviously none the worse for his ambulance scare on Wednesday - he is back on his war games, full on!
My free satellite package ends this month and I have got to organise what I want to have once I start paying for it... gulp! I love my sport but the cheapest way is nearly £60 a month once I have added my phone line and broadband. I am going to have to do some serious juggling of figures, but it is something that I really enjoy, so I will try and afford it.
I am going horse riding tomorrow, which will be very welcome no matter what the weather is. It is raining at the moment and the forecast doesn't give out too much hope. Oh well....
More updates to follow I expect...

SA

Wordsmith

Well done for taking the initiative with HR, SA. You are quite right - if the job is not worth it financially and if you aren't enjoying it, then better to look for something more suitable. Keep reminding yourself that it is not your fault - and don't let it linger like before so that you end up being really unhappy. I hope all goes well next week and that your manager can be grown-up about it all.

Enjoy your horse riding tomorrow. Good luck with juggling the figures so that you can keep Sky.

savingwannabe

At least you will hear soon. Poor flower it all sounds so stressful.

I do hope you have a good time with the horses and can get a good deal with the cable people. I am with NTL and i get a basic M package, broadband (large i think) and free phonecalls all the time to 01etc numbers for £38. No fancy stuff for me any more but i dont really watch it until the summer hols as i am busy with marking most evenings.

Horace

Well done on the HR peeps.

Sorry to hear that the Fattys are still using their tumbledryer and playing war games. I was asked by my new neighbour Dee if there was a communal tv aerial so had to point out where it was in the flat..for some dumb reason they have been placed next to our balcony doors which is an odd place to put a TV. I met her husband Lloyd who has now come over from Spain - I suggested that he chat with the landlord because the landlord is always looking for good workmen and as he is a qualified electrician and plumber then he can't go far wrong.

I am having to have words with the students upstairs as they have now taken to standing out by my shed smoking spliffs and chatting rather loudly..why can't they stand on their own ruddy balcony why do they have to come down and stand by my shed (the old coal houses have been turned into storage sheds)? I am going to ask the landlord for a key so that I can lock that door so they will be stuffed. They were yakking and larking about at 2.34am (I know the time because I looked at my clock wondering why I had woken up:mad:).

Sorry for being a cantakerous and intolerant old woman:o

The horseriding sounds fab - I havent been for ages because I am rather scared these days, getting off the left side of a horse is scary because of my lack of vision in my left eye and I cannot judge distances too well.

On the TV front..I have Virgin Cable (used to be Telewest in Brum) and have a Medium Package, I get free weekend calls (I am crafty I set a timer by the phone for 58 mins and then I wait for a bit and then ring the person back and continue to chat). I have broadband 20mb which is quite quick and loads of TV channels including Eurosport and Eurosport2. Every so often Virgin do their best to tempt me with different channels hoping against hope that I will sign up for their Large or Extra Large packages..what I do is watch the channels that I have been given for free until they are taken away again. Nat Geo is my favourite so I will watch it solidly for a month until it is taken away. There is no way that I will part with extra cash for more tv channels.

savingwannabe

Oh how irritating i know what students can be like. I was one (but a good one for ages). We lived next to some mean students who used to play loud music deliberately to upset my upstairs housemate.

Sorry about your eye Horace. I went blind twice but sight came back after a few months luckily. I am trying to be careful now with my diabetes so it doesn't happen again.

startagain_2

Good morning diary and a big joint thankyou for my pals who are just so understanding of my woes.. For some years, I have compounded my problems because I have always blamed myself and, being alone, didn't have anyone to give me any other perspective on things. That is one of the reasons that I miss my psycho appts so much - he was a real voice of reason. At least the door is open for me to go back, perhaps I can build that into the future when it gets discussed this week?
I am so pleased that you are posting here with us, Horace, you fit in beautifully! Pot smoking students - heavens, so much for being poor, destitute and unable to afford tuition fees, not your lot, it seems
I think I would have changed to Virgin IF it was available in our area, but it seems that there are no plans to bring the TV in for a couple of years at least, and I want an all in one package - I can't be doing with faffing about. My broadband speed is very fast because I am only 250yds from the local exchange. I must admit that my TV and broadband are my social life, hobby and lifeline in general so I suppose £60 is good value. It is £20 odd for the sports and I don't think I could do without them. It is too ingrained in me after many years of working in the industry. Thinking about it, if I can get a job working in town then I won't have to use the car and that is currently costing me £50 a month in petrol. Crazy - 10% of my earnings!
I am sounding like a right whinge - I apologise, but I am trying to be positive, really....
My "should have gone to specsavers" electrician friend is calling on Monday evening to put another socket in the kitchen for my microwave. I did toy with trying to bribe the HA sparky on Thursday to do it for a bit of cash (:o) but he was running late and didn't seem "the type" - if you know what I mean... hehe Anyway, it wont be too expensive and it will mean that it will all look a lot neater than it does now. Slowly getting there.....
Off to feed ducks, facilitate MrT's morning "ritual", and then horse riding.... speak to you all later.
Hugs
SA

RosaBernicia

startagain wrote: »

That is one of the reasons that I miss my psycho appts so much - he was a real voice of reason. At least the door is open for me to go back, perhaps I can build that into the future when it gets discussed this week?

Not sure if you mean you'd discuss this with work, or think about it after the result of the work discussions?

I'm not sure I'd say anything to work yet tbh - if you can just look flexible and enthusiastic and generally marvellous to get through your probation review, it will give you more options later on. Unfortunately anything that suggests you aren't flexible or that you have any kind of long term health issue is likely to lose you brownie points with work - even if they are enlightened enough to appreciate your honesty, it means they have to think about how the benefits of your skills and enthusiasm weigh with the risks of you not being able to help with changing work needs or having to take sick leave. If you just don't say anything, they don't have to think about it and can't record the results. As much as I personally think honesty should be rewarded, I think the safest option with work is to look as good as possible until you've got a permanent contract and they have some legal obligations to you as well.

Hope you had a lovely time riding

Rosa xx

startagain_2

Good Morning diary,

I had every intention of coming back onto the forum and posting after my horseriding but got too comfy on the settee!

Thanks Rosa for your advice. I wasn't planning to mention it at work at all but I was thinking that IF there are any other options offered to me, perhaps at the office nearer to home or even if they give me the boot, then I can start my sessions again and reap the benefit from a bit of thought chanelling and mind strengthening. It worked wonders before and I am sure would do so again.
No, I certainly wouldn't try and explain anything to my current manager - she is from a different generation, culture and mindset to take that on board, I am sure

Life is too short to keep living a mistake, whether it be a relationship, a lifestyle choice, or a job and I shall move on if neccessary. I am (slowly) beginning to realise what suits me.... I need to be responsible for my own workload - be it mopping a floor or completing a project. Being undermined crushes my confidence and self esteem, and Yes I am over sensitive but I need the space to be allowed to show that I CAN do something and do it well...
When did the world change - it never used to be like this?

Horse riding was wonderful. I rode a horse that I hadn't been on before and it stayed dry except for one short shower. We were a small group of experienced riders and the horses were full of pep. I have booked for a fortnights time. I wonder if I will have a job to pay for it?

I have given MrT a wormer tablet this morning and it was almost as big as he is! It is a good thing that he is a greedy little beasty - I cut it in half and buried it in bits of cheese and No Looking Back - until a few hours time..... Still, another routine job done. I also buy his flea treatments in bulk and I manage to get that on without a muzzle and a fight these days! It is only a few drops for heavens sake, anyone would think I was trying to do something awful to him.

I am having some lovely nights sleep at the moment - there is no noise from the Fatty family bedroom at night - hooray, after 18 months. But.... the weird buzzer noise continues. It is something she switches on when she gets up and off when she goes to bed and it is on all day and evening. The noise reverberates through my living room, bathroom and hallway.... What is it? It sounds like a pump of some sort, or I remember my sister once bought an ioniser (?) to clean the air after people had smoked in the room, and it sounds a bit like that - but a lot louder. I don't think it would be enough to register as a nuisance but it really does make a huge difference once she turns it off. Please, please, please, please... Move somewhere else and give me some peace and quiet and nice neighbours to be friends with....

I need to get a bit of oomph and back into doing my surveys - I have let so many go recently - perhaps I will have more time soon...

Not so much to write about - I hope you all have a nice day today and that you have got some sunshine too.

Hugs

SA

Wordsmith

startagain wrote: »

Life is too short to keep living a mistake, whether it be a relationship,

:whistle: Timely reminder ...