Christmas money dilema??

carolwat

sheryldoc wrote:

U calling me a spade :O thats harsh! :rotfl:

I didnt call u any names LoL.. jst said IMO that I thought u attempted to portray yourself as those people.. Your awful full of yourself if u think I actually considered you worthy enough to BE them! :rotfl:

You are the one who said we were entitiled to our opinions.. my opinion was you should both GTF.. didnt expect it to happen.. didnt use any force.. jst stated My humble opinion..

As for the thankfully hes not with u comment.. Low Blow .. Your halo will choke you if you keep up the personal comments regarding others children BUt thanx for your concern hes jst fine thanx

You have no idea about my life.. even Mystic Meg isnt that good

i was talking about my own child not any child of anyone elses. you brought those other names into it and not me therefore you obviously felt i was trying to be one of them not me. theres nothing wrong with you stating your opinion but i felt it was wrong for you to tell someone to leave because she didnt agree with you.

sheryldoc

hopingforahouse wrote:

Eeek! Without reading all of these replies, I would just say no, its never right. But as many people have said, what is the point in sitting in a freezing house, with no food, when your 3 year old has £500 in the bank.

At the end of the day, you're a FAMILY, not a bunch of individuals living together in a house.

If you really needed some money that you knew your child could help you out with and he or she was 35, there wouldn't be the same argument, as he or she could make that choice. And hopefully your children will grow up to be the kind of people that would give or lend money to their family if they could, and felt it was appropriate.

So my answer (finally) would be - spend it on whatever you feel is appropriate - if you don't NEED to spend the money on clearing debt or whatever, then don't, put it in a bank account. If you do need to, then do. Buying householdy type items that they will benefit from is okay - e.g. bunkbeds, clothes for them etc. If you NEED to spend it on bills etc then do, but not unless you have to. It is their money, but if this money has to contribute towards keeping the family going then fine. Otherwise, then I feel that yes, it would be wrong.

AT LAST... SOME SENSE! :T

Thats exactly how anyone with common sense would see it.


u better be careful some would have you stoned to death in public for stealing from your children for comments like that :rotfl:

mizmir

carolwat wrote:

im sorry but the kids didnt get her into debt did they. she chose to spend what she did and yes maybe it was on necessary things but then maybe she should have tried to budget better. there are places that can help with that kind of thing. even someone on benefits should be able to budget with the money they get. if someone has debts beyond their control its because they have spent way over what they can afford. i was on benefits for a while and had to manage by cutting back. im not saying its easy, its far from it but its not right to use someone elses money to pay your debts.

So you'd rather someone couldn't heat their house properly or afford to feed their child than touch savings in a child's name?

How anyone got into that position is irrelevant. What matters is that they are trying to sort it out and that while they do so they can look after their families. Life is not as black and white as you suggest I am afraid.

carolwat

sheryldoc wrote:

People in glass houses..

but NO you have never done ANYTHING that may be considered wrong by some.. eh Theresa?

Its bunkbeds shes buying no 5 gram of crack and a holiday to jamaica with her toy boy lover..

BUILD A BLOODY BRIDGE..

i will repeat myself because you obviously havnt read everything thoroughly before you have jumped in. as i stated earlier i have no problem with the OP buying beds. i think its wrong she will also use the money to pay off debts, check her post, its what she said. she said she could pay debts and still buy beds. she asked for opinions so i have given mine yet i have been abused because of it. im not theresa and not once have i said i am. like i said earlier, im a mother doing her best, probably just like you. am i so wrong for doing that?

Broken_hearted

I do worry about any parent who would see their child be hungry or worse still homeless and hungry rather than take their childrens money. I should hve let my children run around with no shoes rags for clothes and hopefully find some scraps to eat out of peoples bins. They would have felt so happy knowing that through all the misery they could look forward to some money when they hit 18, big wow. I've talked to my 10 year old tonight about this and he thought it was strange that I was even bothered that it was gone.
As an aside I've never paid debts of with their money, I have bought food/ clothes for the familyand paid essential bills.
We were once a two income family with a high horse to sit on. Its a hell of a long way down.

carolwat

mizmir wrote:

So you'd rather someone couldn't heat their house properly or afford to feed their child than touch savings in a child's name?

How anyone got into that position is irrelevant. What matters is that they are trying to sort it out and that while they do so they can look after their families. Life is not as black and white as you suggest I am afraid.

she never said she was that desperate and that she couldnt heat the house or feed the kids. if it was that bad she wouldnt even have asked the question in the first place would she. so suddenly what position you are in is irrelevant unless of course im in my position and them im just lucky and on my high horse eh. i know life isnt black and white, i have been through some tough s*it to get where i am now. im not stupid and naive. again i have only given my opinion which if you go back was asked for.

carolwat

Broken_hearted wrote:

I do worry about any parent who would see their child be hungry or worse still homeless and hungry rather than take their childrens money. I should hve let my children run around with no shoes rags for clothes and hopefully find some scraps to eat out of peoples bins. They would have felt so happy knowing that through all the misery they could look forward to some money when they hit 18, big wow. I've talked to my 10 year old tonight about this and he thought it was strange that I was even bothered that it was gone.
As an aside I've never paid debts of with their money, I have bought food/ clothes for the familyand paid essential bills.
We were once a two income family with a high horse to sit on. Its a hell of a long way down.

i dont think any parent would see their child hungry etc. you did the right thing, of course you did. like i said earlier, the OP didnt she was was as desperate as people are making out. i think this is where some people have misread this topic. like you said you have never paid debts off with their money, obviously you dont think this is the right thing to do otherwise you would have done it. am i so wrong for thinking the same.

mizmir

carolwat wrote:

she never said she was that desperate and that she couldnt heat the house or feed the kids. if it was that bad she wouldnt even have asked the question in the first place would she. so suddenly what position you are in is irrelevant unless of course im in my position and them im just lucky and on my high horse eh. i know life isnt black and white, i have been through some tough s*it to get where i am now. im not stupid and naive. again i have only given my opinion which if you go back was asked for.

The OP didn't say that but others on this thread have said that they were - I was referring to them. You suggested that taking money from children's savings was theft. I'm sorry - but that is an insult to people who are doing their level best to do the best for their families in desperate circumstances.

nickyhutch

sheryldoc wrote:

That High horse your on is a cracker..

U should ride away into the sunset on it.. n right off this post..

How is my having an opinion being on a high horse? The OP asked for opinions, I gave mine. That's what message boards are all about, isn't it?





PS. You're = you are; your = belonging to you.

carolwat

mizmir wrote:

The OP didn't say that but others on this thread have said that they were - I was referring to them. You suggested that taking money from children's savings was theft. I'm sorry - but that is an insult to people who are doing their level best to do the best for their families in desperate circumstances.

i am referring to the OP as that is who has asked for an opinion. i never suggested it was theft i think you will find if you look back that was somebody else. i then went on to agree with that person but i certainly didnt suggest that in the first place. there are a lot of people doing the best they can to provide for their families and some people do that by breaking into other peoples houses and taking what doesnt belong to them. is it ok thought as they are doing their best. of course it isnt ok, that is stealing. im not saying that the OP would be on level with that kind of person but it does involve the same thing in that you are taking what doesnt officially belong to you. how can one kind of taking what doesnt belong to you be ok but another not.