Christmas money dilema??

Serialdieter

Just to add my 2p worth.

Personally we don't use the children's money for house stuff but buy what they need - sometimes the boring stuff like underwear etc, other times the nicer clothes. My eldest asked at the weekend for some new boots so I told her she can use the money she has been given for Christmas and she's fine with that. I now have the problem of finding time to take her shopping for them...

Have to add, in this situation I'd buy the bunk beds.

Jx

sheryldoc

carolwat wrote:

ok im not having a go at anyone but im very shocked to read that everyone who has posted on here thinks its ok to spend money that has been given as presents to their kids. my son is 2 years old and has 2 accounts totalling about £2500 and i would never ever even dream of taking his money whether i was going to pay it back at a later date or not. it is not my money to spend, it is his money and every penny of it will be there until the day he turns 18. every penny he has ever been given for being born, birthdays, xmas, easter etc has gone straight into his account.

i am really really shocked that people actually use their kids money.
regards
carol

ps like i said imnot having a go at anyone just telling you all that i was shocked to read this.

Well you should jst count your blessings you have never found yourself in a position where you had no choice..

I wish I was as saintly as some..

AndyR_3

When my best friend was younger, times were very hard. His parents were both out of work (this was the early 1980s - half of Sheffield was out of work). What my friend knows now, but didn't know then, is that his parents used £500 that was in a savings account for him, set up by his grandma when he was born. They used this to pay the mortgage and household bills. When my friend was older, they told him what they had done. He doesn't mind, he doesn't think badly of his parents and he told them they didn't need to worry about paying the money back.

He sees it that, at the end of the day, he had a roof over his head, food on the table and clothes to wear. Things fortunatly picked up and his parents both found jobs. There wasn't actually a great deal of debt (I guess loans/credit cards weren't so easily available then), so his parents started saving. Because of this they were able to help him cover the costs of going to university (we were the first year to have no student grants, and the first year to have to pay tuition fees). Without their savings (and, I think, their sacrifices - his parents haven't been on holiday for over 20 years), he wouldn't have been able to go to uni.

At the end of the day, no child needs hundreds of pounds. It's nice to be able to save for them, but it's not as important as paying the council tax. But you need to do what you think is right for your family.

Don't feel bad, what ever you choose though. So long as your kids are happy. It might actually do them good not to have lots and lots, in that they might appreciate what they have more? I don't know, I don't have kids myself, but it does drive me mad seeing parents spending huge amounts of money on Christmas, which is just one day, then not being able to pay their bills the next month.

whatatwit

I agree with Tyllwyd, 'sell' some of the presents you already have to the Grands, that way, you can let them know what they have bought.

I too have 'borrowed' my daughter's money.
I know how much it is and it will be returned when i am able.

tootles_2

Go ahead and buy the chidlren the bunk beds they need and tell the greats what you have done, I personally would rather my grandchildren have something useful rather than toys they play with for a short while and then abandon.....sounds like they have enough pressies any way.

I give my children cheques and ask them to spend it on something the children really need....shoes, clothes etc.......rather than on tacky stuff, two of my granchildren were taken to Disney World last year, all their chirstmas money was put into a bank account and they were bought jeans trainers etc whilst they were away, the chose what they wanted to spend the cash on and were very happy, had a great time and came home with a new wardrobe each.

Carolwat...... you are very lucky to be in the position you are, some people do not have the choice, keeping a roof over their childrens heads, food in their bellies and shoes on their feet should always come first.........a childs happiness, security and comfort is more important than cash in the bank.

Jewel_2

The whole idea of having money in the children's bank accounts while parents slip further into debt is silly. The money is spent on the children, whichever way you look at it! A child with a warm home and the security and love of a family is far more important than money sitting in a bank, waiting for the child to turn 18, so that they can buy things for themselves (which would, incidentally, be paid for by parents otherwise).

Family buy presents which we all sell/get rid of eventually. If my mum bought my daughter a toy I would not let it gather dust etc once she was too old for it, I would give it to charity/sell it, and probably keep the money. Is that not the same thing?

I had neighbours who put every bit of cash for their kids into a bank account. They worried continuously that the older one had more than the younger one. On Christmas day they had very little to unwrap. At 18, they were given lots, and then had to pay for their own weddings. They are both now divorced.

Just because it's money doesn't make it more precious than something else. You don't need to justify making your family more secure. My mum and dad save £2 coins for me, and in September gave me £238! They told me to spend it on whatever I wanted, I paid the gas bill, the elec bill and bought my daughter a new blazer for school. That helped me loads.

nickyhutch

[QUOTE=livinginhopebut_when_you_are_faced_with_having_nothing_and_I_mean_nothing...............when_there_really_is_no_other_option_it_would_be_foolish_to_make_yourself_homeless_just_to_keep_their_money_in_the_bank.[/QUOTE]

The OP didn't say she was desperatley in need of the money, though, did she? Just that she felt the children aleady had enough presents. Put the money away for them for when they want something.

It's morally wrong to take your childen's money. It's been given to them, not to you.

bananakinz

I personally would not use the money to clear our debts, I may borrow the odd tenner but pay it back.

Get the kids bunk beds as that is a useful and needed thing, kit them with school shoes whatever as long as the cash is being spent on them. Buy back some of the presents you've bought them and then spend that cash on the debt!

If you can't spend it on them, put in in an account for them!

southernscouser

I think it's fair to use the money to pay for things like bunk beds etc. Personally I wouldn't use it to pay for my own debts or a mortgage deposit but thats just my opinion.

livinginhope

nickyhutch wrote:

The OP didn't say she was desperatley in need of the money, though, did she? Just that she felt the children aleady had enough presents. Put the money away for them for when they want something.

It's morally wrong to take your childen's money. It's been given to them, not to you.

I wasn't referring to the OP when I said desperate,that was my situation,the reason we used the children's money.
It may be morally wrong in your opinion,but as said,needs must and I refuse to have gas and electric cut off and starving people just to keep some money in the bank.My children know what we have done and don't have a problem with it.DD's gran gave her £20 for her birthday,she came shopping with me and offered to put the money towards the food,I said no we have enough she is only 5,my children know our situation and I am very proud of the way they handle it.