Help son looking at websites he shouldnt be

[Deleted User]

Very simply fixed...
Get an account with OpenDNS - set the filters to the level you want (it gives you categories of sites to restrict). Ideally set it on your home broadband router, but you can easily set it on a PC without needing to be too technical.

Instant !!!!!! blocking. Then, go hide all your magazines that expose any flesh. Realistically, you can't stop a 13 year old from 'exploring', but you can restrict it to stuff that isn't too exotic.

daviecol

Well speaking as a father of two great teenagers that I am very proud of and have never been any trouble to me (or more importantly anybody else), I can honestly say I am glad I let my teenage kids drink alcohol and view !!!!!!. Don't get me wrong I'm no pushover but I did my kids disciplining while they were toddlers so by the time they were older we could all go out together and they knew to respect other people.

At the end of the day being a parent is about letting our children find out who they are and what they like, as long as they do this without hurting anybody else in the process then that's a good job done.

As for making a teenage boy promise to not look at !!!!!! on his pc, well all you've taught him there is how to break a promise and lie to his parents. Both of which I must add are your own fault.

Torry_Quine

daviecol wrote: »

Well speaking as a father of two great teenagers that I am very proud of and have never been any trouble to me (or more importantly anybody else), I can honestly say I am glad I let my teenage kids drink alcohol and view !!!!!!. Don't get me wrong I'm no pushover but I did my kids disciplining while they were toddlers so by the time they were older we could all go out together and they knew to respect other people.

At the end of the day being a parent is about letting our children find out who they are and what they like, as long as they do this without hurting anybody else in the process then that's a good job done.

As for making a teenage boy promise to not look at !!!!!! on his pc, well all you've taught him there is how to break a promise and lie to his parents. Both of which I must add are your own fault.

While I agree that disciplining children starts when they are young I cannot agree that telling a child not to look at !!!!!! means that if he does that somehow makes it your fault.

A lot depends on the parental attitude towards !!!!!!, if someone things that !!!!!! should not be viewed until an adult if at all then of course they are going to want to stop the child viewing it.

janninew

rachbc wrote: »

Seriously? I really hope both my son and daughter have equal opportunities to express their sexuality...and I'm certainly bringing them up to realise they also both have respnsibilities in terms of preventing pregnancy/ sti's too

Not sure what you mean about the 'seriously' part of your post. Many people have idea's about what they think they will do and how they will react when they have children, all I was saying is sometimes when it happens to your own child, you might not be as liberal minded as you think.

I wonder how different this thread would have been if it were a 13 year old girl looking at !!!!!! and naked men? It may be wrong, but I'm sure my husband would have more of a problem catching his 13 year old daughter looking at naked men and their privates, than catching our son looking at ladies. I'm sure lots of Dads have the same opinion! I know its hypocritcal, but I'm sure plenty will admit to feeling the same.

jim22

Janninew-I'm sure your right.

System

I don't think hardscore/extreme !!!!!! should be available to young people like the OPs child. For starters they might think that that is "normal" for relationships, which in all honesty it isn't a true representation at all.

bitemebankers

ringo_24601 wrote: »

Very simply fixed...
Get an account with OpenDNS - set the filters to the level you want (it gives you categories of sites to restrict). Ideally set it on your home broadband router, but you can easily set it on a PC without needing to be too technical.

That's sounds really simple. Also pretty straightforward for any technically-savvy teen to circumvent.

but you can restrict it to stuff that isn't too exotic.

No you can't. If you think you can, you're deluding yourself. Either that, or you're raising your children in a bunker, with no access to the outside world.

For those who have a moral problem with !!!!!!, a far better approach would be to try and convince your kids to follow your philosophy. Trying to enforce a ban by technical means and still allow internet access for useful stuff is beyond the capability of almost all parents.

daviecol

Torry_Quine wrote: »

While I agree that disciplining children starts when they are young I cannot agree that telling a child not to look at !!!!!! means that if he does that somehow makes it your fault

Sorry I seem to have failed to get my point across to you. What I meant was that it's simply not fair to make your children promise not to do something which in the end they are bound to try.

i.e. Look at !!!!!!, try smoking, try alcohol, masturbate, light a match and hold it till it burns to the end, jump in puddles and so on.

The poster was upset because her son broke a promise to not look at !!!!!!, however she shouldn't have made him make a promise he was never going to be able to keep.

[Deleted User]

bitemebankers wrote: »

That's sounds really simple. Also pretty straightforward for any technically-savvy teen to circumvent.

No you can't. If you think you can, you're deluding yourself. Either that, or you're raising your children in a bunker, with no access to the outside world.

For those who have a moral problem with !!!!!!, a far better approach would be to try and convince your kids to follow your philosophy. Trying to enforce a ban by technical means and still allow internet access for useful stuff is beyond the capability of almost all parents.

fine then, buy him a copy of FHM, tell him to read the interesting articles and look at the pretty ladies.

If you set it up on your wifi router and passworded your router setup (which most are by default) it would quite hard to circumvent. You won't stop kids using their mobile phones to find !!!!!!. Heck, i dunno, my kid is 2, i've got 10 years before this becomes a problem

I guess you need to accept that 'boys will be boys'

retireby50

Can the OP put an "!" after "Help...." in the thread title.........I was about to offer the wrong advice until I double checked!!:eek: