finding out the sex of an unborn baby

taxi36

Thanks to every-one who has repiled.
I do fully understand that the hospitals can sometimes get it wrong infact we probably understand that more than most.

When my Wife was carrying our Daughter 18 years ago the Mater hospital told us that she was a boy . As this was the first Grandchild/Great Grandchild every-one rushed out and bought lots of blue clothes and blankets etc. When the baby was delivered it turned out to be a little girl!

Although it was a shock it was the nicest shock I have ever had. We were able to return all of the clothes to the shop they were purchased from (wonder is that shop still there? Gaby's in Gresham Street in Belfast).

Then , a few years later when the Mater again told us that they thought our third and youngest child was a baby girl we were pleased enough even though this would have been our third little girl . We did however decide to wait until the actual birth before we purchased anything as if it WAS a girl we had more than enough pink clothing what with having two previous baby girls.

Imagine the delight when we welcomed our Son into the world!

We have never been so very glad that the hospital had got it wrong!

Our Son is now almost 13 years old.

I was thinking that maybe technology had moved on a little and the hospitals were less likely to get it wrong. Seems that isnt always the case.

My Daughter knows the hospital got it wrong twice with us before and so I think that although she would like to find out the sex asap she understands that it is not 100% .

andy.m_2

tiamai_d wrote: »

Or because a boy would increase your chances of having Pre ecalmpsia for a third time and then there would be the risks assosiated with having pre eclampsia for a third time after developing eclampsia, HELLP and having had a placenta abruption and nearly dying the last time.

But totally it was so I could see what colour sleepsuits to buy. My health and the health of the baby never popped into my head. Nor did the implications of what exactly would happen if I did die this time. Or the worry and stress and guilt over chosing to continue with the pregnancy, which was a suprise after a coil failure (which may or may not still be in me somewhere).

It was allll about the pink or blue. :cool:

For the record, it was a girl and no pre eclampsia or nearly dying. I did also buy pink sleepsuits once she was born and she was sure that she was a girl because they never do fully decide till they are out. :rotfl:

I am glad you had a happy pregnancy and a little baby girl to show for it :beer:
I am a Catholic so the outcome for me would matter neither way, this will go against the pro-choice brigade however if you are chosing to have a family then the choice is made and the consequences are there to deal with.

Good luck with your family :j

You are also, I would presume, medically one in a million and therefore your case doesn't apply to the "just impatient" lot who all thanked you

Can I ask whether your placenta abruption was related to the fact you had boys or was just something that happened?

andy.m_2

I sympathise 100% with those adjusting to pregnancy, it is very hard even as a man to deal with let alone with all the hormone imballance that you women suffer!

My Wife, like many many other women (at a guess) almost didn't accept she was having a baby until she was laid back on the table giving birth!
How much of that was a fear that something may go wrong or a disbelief of just how much life was going to change I am not sure but all I will say is GOOD LUCK TO ALL OF YOU CARRYING AT THE MOMENT AND THE BEST OF LUCK TO ALL YOUR FUTURES :beer:

elff

We had a surprise with no. 1 a girl..... then with the twins, I "thought" i wanted to know hubby most deffentley didn't... (I always dreamed of a little boy called Alex...) Hubby couldn't make it to a scan one day so i took my twin sister and we found out they were 2 boys... Never told him -still havent he happily spent months thinking of 'girls' names after suguesting to me he would choose girls names i can choose boys

I wish i had waiting knowing to me spoilt the whole surprise especially as i had to effectiley 'lie' to hubby he was so excited at the c-section and i was soo jellous at his excitment as i knew already what they were......

fantafan

I'm catholic and tbh this had no bearing on whether I chose to know the sex of my baby. I've waited 250+ days and have only 3 til my due date. I've had 2 NHS scans and didn't find the sex when given the option and also opted to keep closing my eyes at a 4D scan I had privately.

It's personal choice. I can't wait for hubby to tell me what we have had. It's a nice feeling not knowing and I do feel sad that people find out before but it's their choice. I don't look down on hospitals who don't divulge and say good on them.

All that matters is baby is healthy and happy and loved.

galvanizersbaby

fantafan wrote: »

I'm catholic and tbh this had no bearing on whether I chose to know the sex of my baby. I've waited 250+ days and have only 3 til my due date. I've had 2 NHS scans and didn't find the sex when given the option and also opted to keep closing my eyes at a 4D scan I had privately.

It's personal choice. I can't wait for hubby to tell me what we have had. It's a nice feeling not knowing and I do feel sad that people find out before but it's their choice. I don't look down on hospitals who don't divulge and say good on them.

All that matters is baby is healthy and happy and loved.

Do you mind me asking are you able to articulate why you feel sad that other people find out the sex of their babies though? - as in what it is about it that makes you feel sad? - is it because you personally are feeling nice not knowing and you think everyone would feel the same as you or is there another reason why it saddens you?

I agree with your last statement btw

andy.m_2

Everyone would agreee with the healthy baby sentiment

The sadness for me is that I had the joy of telling my wife the sex of our baby, the way she looked at me to tell her, and that moment is not possible if the sex is known.
That was one of the single most touching moments in our life together, along with the first time I set eyes on her after she had walked down the aisle to be at my side.

The people who need to know the sex are the sort of people who would snoop for presents before Christmas

GarnetLady

Actually I have no urge to snoop on any presents actually and when we have this baby it'll still be an amazing moment for my husband and I, nothing will change that.

Are you saying it was only special for you because you didn't know beforehand? That's a sad sentiment if it's true.

galvanizersbaby

andy.m wrote: »

Everyone would agreee with the healthy baby sentiment

The sadness for me is that I had the joy of telling my wife the sex of our baby, the way she looked at me to tell her, and that moment is not possible if the sex is known.
That was one of the single most touching moments in our life together, along with the first time I set eyes on her after she had walked down the aisle to be at my side.

The people who need to know the sex are the sort of people who would snoop for presents before Christmas

lol!:rotfl:not sure I would quite liken it to that as I read an element of deceipt in to snooping for christmas pressies.

I think basically what you are saying is that because you/your wife felt the joy of not knowing (that was your experience) then everyone should want it that way.

andy.m_2

No no, everyone is different and will take the tender moments they have in their own special ways.

The sadness for me I guess is that you have something so wonderful and magical forming inside you, you are truly blessed and lucky to have such a thing, in just 40 weeks you go from a woman to a mother and it is a miracle.

But you need to know the details now.

Involving science (needed to be able to ascertain the sex) dilutes the magic imo.

Listen, it is horses for courses and everyone has their own rights.

To the lady who says that my sadness means that my life is envyously free from worry has it all wrong, my life is full of worry but I placed not knowing the sex second only to my unborn child and my wife's health during the whole process....