Memorygirls - The Matrix Re-inspired

crickett1234

(((((((((((FANTASIA)))))))))))))

There is a bed available in Nottinghamshire... though it is probably too far away for you. Great Danes and all other beasties accepted. Have to all get on with cats though, and they rule my house, not me.

Fantasia, if there is ANYTHING I can do... please, please let me know. In the meantime, if it is any comfort to you, I will be praying hard for you... and sending positive vibes your way too.

Souk08

Fantasia, I'll do whatever, and am off on Monday if you need me. Just PM me X

fantasia322

back again, cant sleep. I asked him if he was absolutely sure that this was what he wanted and he said it is. He wants to part without acrimony (nice of him) am crying so hard I can hardly type. Devastated is the word. I feel like a cast off shoe. I've never been dumped before. Its always been me thats ended relationships, my marriage and the one serious relationship after marriage ended. I survived those. But I had everything back then. My children and my home. I dont know what to do or how to think. I love this man, more fool me and I dont know if I'm strong enough to handle it.

I appreciate all your support and am so proud to be part of the Matrix. But I've never had to start from scratch and the thought is so overwhelming, I just dont know what to do or how to do it. Think I'm a bit overwrought so better not to say too much more.

I threw away the 10 cigarettes i bought and put a patch back on, really cant go back down that road.
But with this COPD stuff, and now this am at the end of my tether.
positivity will kick in I hope, but hopefully sooner rather than later.
I just cant do this right now, and the future looks so far away. I'm so tired of fighting the world. I have to be worth something, just dont feel it right now.

Sorry xxx

Firewalker

fantasia322 wrote: »

But I've never had to start from scratch and the thought is so overwhelming, I just dont know what to do or how to do it. Think I'm a bit overwrought so better not to say too much more.

Don't be afraid - think of it as an opportunity! I know it sounds harsh and impossible at the moment but how about a year from now?

FW

40somethingmum

Fantasia ((hugs)))

I really feel for you. You WILL get through this one day at a time. Baby steps .

Try and get some sleep sweetie .

Thinking of you


40SMXX

Bitsy_Beans

fantasia322 wrote: »

I have to be worth something, just dont feel it right now.

Sorry xxx

You ARE worth something, even if you don't believe it right this minute. You will get through this, every baby step of the way. Don't waste your energy looking at the future at the moment, just focus on one hour at a time, one day at a time.

And lastly, stop apologising. We are all here for you. No "sorry" needed at the end of your posts, type away as you need to.

Sending you a great big hug to soothe your hurting heart xxx

Craftyscholar

Bitsy_Beans wrote: »

You ARE worth something, even if you don't believe it right this minute. You will get through this, every baby step of the way. Don't waste your energy looking at the future at the moment, just focus on one hour at a time, one day at a time.

And lastly, stop apologising. We are all here for you. No "sorry" needed at the end of your posts, type away as you need to.

Sending you a great big hug to soothe your hurting heart xxx

Sending you strength to survive and echoing what Bitsy has said.

Memory_Girl

Fantasia - there are people on this thread who have started again from nothing, and although it's horrible right now we can support you through it all.

Already the practical stuff is beginning to manifest - ideas for homes and offers to help begin to furnish it - even places you can go if you need to get away.

Just watch the Matrix close ranks and help you achieve whatever you want - but right now we will just wait an be ready for whatever you need, whenever you need it.

One of the things I don't like about "American" personal development is the need to be positive all of the time - sometimes you need to have a "B**chfest" and let it all out before you can move on. The blessing with these lovely ladies is they let you do that, pick you up again, wipe your nose then take you by the arm and lead you forward with a glass in hand to face the world again.

.............. and the kettle is always on here when you need.

MG

groatie_queen

Dear Fantasia, it's hard, painful and the way forward uncertain just now. So much to come to terms with. I came across this quote on Dorset Days, a brilliant blog I follow. Hold onto the thought that better times will come. Not straight off, what can't be cured must be endured, but out of the ashes will come a new life and new ways of being.

Expect to have hope rekindled.
Expect your prayers to be answered in wondrous ways.
The dry seasons in life do not last.
The rains will come again.

~Sarah Ban Breathnach

GQ xox

greenbee

Fantasia - as the others have said, if there is anything I can do let me know. In the meantime, MG is probably your nearest Matrix contact (and you know the way there already!) so go and take advantage of her kettle. You need tea, sympathy and a hug right now. It won't fix things but it might make them a little less bleak.

And well done for turning your back on the cigarettes. Despite everything you still have the strength to do that. And remember, Leyla needs you and WE need you.