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Memorygirls - The Matrix Re-inspired

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  • MrsMoo2U
    MrsMoo2U Posts: 4,005 Forumite
    edited 30 July 2011 at 8:11PM
    Ok Fantasia, deep breaths first and foremost. Next you need somebody who can help you tonight. If OH has gone to his Daughters is he likely to stay there for the evening/overnight giving you some breathing space? Can you phone Women's Aid or Samaritans so that you at least have somebody to talk to tonight?
    Sorry for all of the questions, just trying to focus you in the here and now.
    Who was the guy who helped bring Leyla up to you, can your organise somewhere for Leyla to go to for a few days fostering via him that will give you time to find a place to rent that you could take her to. Please, please dont feel that you are alone in this. I am sure that you have friends nearby who can and will help you in the short term.

    Edit to say By the way, I will let you off for the cigarette, it is probably the only thing that will calm you right now.
    Some days there aren't any trumpets, just lots of dragons. Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow -- Mary Anne Radmacher
  • Memory_Girl
    Memory_Girl Posts: 4,957 Forumite
    Think you need to hold on till Monday till you can get some proper legal advice - but I don't think you should be thinking about moving out at this point.


    Google my friend Pauline To - she is the letting agent beloved of landlords in this area, so if anyone can find you a decent place to take Poochie, she is the one to call (because she is a proactive minx and will simply call in favours until she finds you somewhere). Of course you use my name :D

    Dogs yes - smokers NO!!!! so step away from the fags missus!!!!!

    And we are all here to help with the practical stuff - so just holler

    MG
    FINALLY AND OFFICIALLY DEBT FREE
    Small Emergency Fund £500 / £500
    Pay off all Debts £10,000 / £10,000
    Grown Up Emergency Fund £6000 / £6000 :j
    Pension Provision £6688/£2376
  • Triciaxx
    Triciaxx Posts: 659 Forumite
    ((Fantasia)) I don't know what to say except that the cigarettes will not make it go away. It will just make you poorer. That's not a criticism as I did much the same 31 years ago.

    "I am an emotional cripple, I need to see a psychologist or be in a ward for people with mental illness. Am warped and twisted and disturbed." Been accused of same and - almost - believed it. I had a support network which saved me and so do you - yours may be virtual but it is just as real. I'm sure I'm speaking for all of us when I say PM anyone here and you will get support - don't be proud, your need it - I know!
    But how can you know what you want till you get what you want and you see if you like it?
  • fantasia322
    fantasia322 Posts: 1,373 Forumite
    Nope, totally on my own. Seems to be the way things are for my, he is probably right about me alienating everyone. Feeling soory for my self atm so ignore the waffling. Sorry. Going to go and have a think and see what i can come up with.
  • MrsMoo2U
    MrsMoo2U Posts: 4,005 Forumite
    I echo what MG and Tricia say. When I was throwing in the questions about possible fostering it was more to get you to start thinking practically rather than emotionally. I, in no way, meant that you needed to think about moving out! I find that I cope better when I go into practical mode and taking control of the situation so apologies if that isnt helpful.

    As for the words being put in your mouth. I had an abusive first marriage and despite only being 7 stone at the time I came away from that believing that I was fat and ugly. Dont let yourself believe anything that is said in anger and in an attempt to hurt you.

    Marru, I love that passage you have quoted, it strikes so many chords but I have never had it put to me in that way.
    Some days there aren't any trumpets, just lots of dragons. Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow -- Mary Anne Radmacher
  • Memory_Girl
    Memory_Girl Posts: 4,957 Forumite
    You waffle all you like ..................... we are here.

    ..................... and you will survive this and come out stronger.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybXrrTX3LuI&feature=fvst just to give you a giggle.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZBR2G-iI3-I the real version - listen to the lyrics.

    MG
    FINALLY AND OFFICIALLY DEBT FREE
    Small Emergency Fund £500 / £500
    Pay off all Debts £10,000 / £10,000
    Grown Up Emergency Fund £6000 / £6000 :j
    Pension Provision £6688/£2376
  • The_Dragon
    The_Dragon Posts: 9,749 Forumite
    I've not been on the thread long, so don't know all of you that well but Fantasia please accept some virtual hugs from me as well
    Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for thou art crunchy and good with catsup :D
    NSD 15/20, OS WL 21-6 (4) :(C.R.A.P R.O.L.L.Z #44 Twisted Firestarter, VSP #57 - £39.43
    :p Every Penny's a Prisoner :p
  • Memory_Girl
    Memory_Girl Posts: 4,957 Forumite
    The day I drove DS1's dad to the airport (the Saturday after the Thursday when he told me he was leaving) - and I drove him to Heathrow to make sure HE GOT ON THE PLANE:D

    Well I drove out of the airport onto the elevated section and Capital Radio crackled back in to life with:

    I'm a Survivor:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R_RVId9OkgI

    I was laughing pretty hysterically (with a 6month old in the back) when I pulled over to get a cup of tea and my Bank Manager mate called to check I was OK.

    When I told him the first song I heard was that - his only response??

    "Thank F**k it wasn't Tammy Wynette!!!"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CMXnu31-k_U




    ................... and you know what - he was b****y right :rotfl:

    MG


    PS and one day I will have a Killer Keynote titled "Thank F**k it wasn't Tammy Wynette!!!":D
    FINALLY AND OFFICIALLY DEBT FREE
    Small Emergency Fund £500 / £500
    Pay off all Debts £10,000 / £10,000
    Grown Up Emergency Fund £6000 / £6000 :j
    Pension Provision £6688/£2376
  • MrsMoo2U
    MrsMoo2U Posts: 4,005 Forumite
    PS and one day I will have a Killer Keynote titled "Thank F**k it wasn't Tammy Wynette!!!"

    Now I would have to book to come to that one.
    Some days there aren't any trumpets, just lots of dragons. Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, I will try again tomorrow -- Mary Anne Radmacher
  • Eager_Elephant
    Eager_Elephant Posts: 4,714 Forumite
    Part of the Furniture 1,000 Posts Combo Breaker
    I'm glad you have popped back Fantasia.

    Although I have been here a while I was not aware of the issues in your relationship. If there has been any kind of domestic violence (and this does not mean actual physical abuse it can be emotional and financial) then I second another poster above who suggested contacting Women's Aid - they are 24 hours a day and can give you help and advice and hopefully somewhere to go but unfortunately they don't take dogs but usually have contacts with charities who will foster the dog for a short while.

    I know that legally you can stay but do you think he will make your life hell? If he will then it might be easiest for you and your sanity to leave - I appreciate that at a weekend it might be difficult to go somewhere.
    I am worried that if you leave the house he might change the locks or something equally daft!!

    If you have no money I am happy to lend you some so you can get a deposit on a property asap. It wouldn't be loads maybe a few hundred but if some others could help I am sure we could get you a deposit together.

    Is there a credit union in your area, sometimes they will help with rent deposits or if not speak to your local authority's housing department as they will know what to do.
    All council's should have an emergency housing number which is available 24/7 so you could try ringing them.

    EE
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