Please help.....

Percy1983

I do think you are building this up in your head to be more than it is, by all means he may get upset, maybe even mad or if like me he will just want to sort it.

Yes you have a fear he may leave you but I can speak for all off us here, if a man leaves his pregnant wife because of a few debts he really needs his head checking, I am sure you and his unborn child (little spud) mean a lot more to him than a few credit card bills you may have ran up before you met.

miggy

I don't want to read and run.

Breaking bad news is horrible, but you have to be strong and do it. The uncertainty he's going through at the moment, plus what you're going through, will soon be over... it isn't just the good times that make a relationship strong, it's how you both cope with the hard times. It will be a test of both your characters, but in the long run it could make your relationship amazingly good.

If you can start to sort this out now, it will be out of the way for you to enjoy the future with your children - you don't have years of struggle ahead, just this short time then you will be on the way to working it out.

I'll be thinking of you

cyclura

Just do it, you will both feel better for it...........even if hes angry or blows his top for a bit you both need it said, the poor man is probably thinking the worst if he keeps telling you he loves you so this secret cant be doing either of you any good. You may find hes relieved to an extent its "just" debt and nothing unfixable.

good luck

BFM

good luck with telling him soon as.

and if you are married with kids then don't be a martyr with clearing those debts yourself as if you can get them cleared from savings you will have much more money as a family than letting the high interest debts continue to grow. even if you set some sort of goal to "pay" him back by running a tight ship at home and making savings you both win.

raq

AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH wrote: »

Thank you. He knows something is wrong because I keep crying all the time and he has said he knows something is wrong. I am very stressed and I know it's no good for all of us, including our unborn child.

I appreciate the support and I am going to try and tell him tonight. So many times over the past few weeks, it has been right in my mouth to say it.

Will definitely let you know how things go.

5 years ago we just had baby number 3 which was lovely. My hubby only thought we where about £8,500.00 in debt when actually we where £15,000.00. He was so supportive and only wished I told him sooner as he thought I was mentally unhappy or felt that he was losing me. I was such a better person and happier person for telling him and to this day we are still working on this debt together.

SHELLSHOCK

Have you thought about showing him this thread and all the posts? It might just help him realise how upset and annoyed you are with yourself for keeping it from him.

Deep breath and jump in luvvie - you know it makes sense xx

AAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHH

Well I have told him and all I can say is my husband is remarkable. There was no anger, no upset, no fallout just sadness that
I hadn't felt able to do it sooner.

All he gave me is support and reassurance of how much he loves me. He was relieved I told him and he even felt sorry for me for what I had been going through!!!
He says I should learn from if but let go of any guilt. I have certainly learnt one big lesson.

The loan and card are being paid off by him, no question of repayment. He says it is our money. I am so very lucky to have such a husband.

Thank you all so much. I hope that I can be of use and give advice and support to people on here now.

Xx

dlb

Im so pleased for you, i have been watching this thread and popped in this morning to see if you had told him.
I bet you feel 110% better....well done x

SOT2011

Great news - so pleased for you.

CH27

I'm pleased you've told him. It will so good for your health.