Hoping for some support

ellesbellesxxx

Hi there....first of all well done for realising things need to change. Lots of the positive stories will help you realise you are not alone and it can be done!!!
I am a Teacher too - I do the one to one tuition to boost my finances, but if you log onto www.schoolzone.co.uk and register there, you can do surveys (for credits and prize draws) and in my area, they do regular focus groups where you can get 50 pounds for 2 hours of discussion group work!
I know you said about your children coming home still - would it be possible to have a lodger on Monday-Friday scheme? I know you said house needs work doing so might not be an option but could help with bills!
Good luck!

chesky369

Your water bill looks very high for a one-person property - are you on a meter? If not, do think about it - I pay half what you do. Your housekeeping bill on the other hand works out at only £40 per week (ish), including feeding three dogs! Take my hat off to you there.

Did you move jobs at the same time as you moved houses? Or are you commuting - maybe you could find alternative employment. I always thought teaching was about the most portable career, so you could possibly look around for somewhere more congenial. Have you made friends in the village yet? It's still early days I suppose but villages are supposed to be more friendly than towns.

I'm trying to look at you as a whole person, not just as a bunch of money problems.

tugrin

Yes Chesky369 I agree that it should be a portable career but apparently these days only if you are under 30 (cheap) and for promotion in my current school pretty too.
At my age with my experience people wonder why am I not at least a deputy (have been twice which doesn't help) and think Im not very good AND expensive to boot.
I moved to this village because I have friends here already and I my new neighbours are absolutely wonderful people - I wanted to get away from the cachment area that I was teaching in due to the fact that some of the kids knoew where I lived and as there is a gang culture growing there I didnt want my car keyed of my windows egged as the little darlings got older.
I have applied for 2 posts nearer to home - but as I said age is against me big time
I do love it in this village even if the house is a bit ghasty at the mo. I couldnt really have a lodger due to the dogs and son comes out during the week when he has the day off.

chesky369

I see brighter things in the last post. You have friends locally. You have good neighbours, who may indeed turn into friends. Turns out your son (despite not wanting to know about your debts) comes to see you in his spare time. Your daughter comes at the weekends.

This is all good stuff.

OK you hate your job. Now let's not even begin to count the people who hate their jobs. Unfortunately, they're a necessary evil and you seem to have done what for you is the best thing which is not live on top of it and not carry it home with you.

Tell us about your mortgage. What about the water meter? Also the very expensive personal insurance.

tugrin

Duaghter only comes back from uni in hols as is 200 miles away - son only comes about once a month for an overnight stay.
Mortgage- I was desperate to move here (waiting for at least 14 years til kids off hands) and didnt have much equity in last property got a 13 year mortgage at end of 2009 just after 53rd birthday opted for fixed term 5.6%. Insurance is redundancyand critical illness plus life due to worried about health - pension alone will not keep up repayments.
I have had bad jobs bfore but this school takes the biscuit for the unpleasantness and sheer cheek of the senior management (head and deputy regularly take days off to 'work at home' averaging out at about 1 a week each - makes them part time in my and other colleagues view. They are absolutlely against anyone who is over 40 as old/ entrenched/ stubborn and with nothing to offer never mind that the deputy has only ever taught infants in this school and this is her 14th year - this is my 30th!! SORRY to rant but this year has been particularly bad as was forced to move year groups and have been consigned to a block where \i have a line manager with no KS2 experience and who is in her 7th yeaarof teaching yes i did apply for the post - no real reason given for me not getting it)

Back to now - I have always been terrified to get a water meter I have this awful feeling I use lots of H2O and will end up paying more - irrational???
The house needs redecorating - but has things like ceramnic tiles that need to be taken up in kitchen and sliding doors that use too much space replaced type of thing rather than just a coat of paint.






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chesky369

So your mortgage will end when you're 66 and will still be in employment, that's OK. You will have to accept the fact that you won't be able to do much to your house until you've sorted out your debts so the sooner it gets underway the better.

You really should go onto a water meter - human beings living on their own probably all use about the same amount - after all, you can only have so many baths per day. I also water my garden. It took me a long time to be convinced but after I had a meter installed about 3/4 years ago, I kicked myself for not having done so sooner. If you're experiencing problems with paying your water bill, it may be possible for you to apply to your local water company trust for assistance. I only know about the Thames Water Trust which has to be done through something like CAB but can be useful.

Can't advise about the job except to say make sure you enjoy your free time in the village with your friends and neighbours. You said in your first post that you have no-one to say 'don't do that' - just imagine your son and daughter's reaction to your spending when tempted. Or discuss any potential purchases with your friends first.

whiteguineapig

a very small thing tugrin, if you do surveys and are paid in vouchers you can use love to shop vouchers and boots vouchers to pay for pescriptions in boots chemist
this saves me quite a lot as i need regular pescriptions so i save them for that, any leftover they put it on a giftcard

tugrin

ellesbelles and whiteguineapig - thank you - I have aleady registered with schoolzone ellesbelles thanks to you - took me a while to put CV together that would be the right kind (not just a list of schools).
whiteguineapig - I have bought a prepaid 3 card as I am getting quite a lot of pills at the mo (yes I know - keep taking the pills....) but it would be good to save up some vouchers for a good face cream - I'm quite crumpled and wrinkly because of all the crying I've been doing this weekend (lol)
Everyone is being fantastic - which make me boo-hoo more -you know how it i.
I am certainly looking forward to this time next week -1) Pay day on Fri so feel I can really begin to budget properly and2) half term so a rest (please dont say teachers get too many holidays anyone- it is SO draining being locked in a room with 26 prepubescent children most with significant needs)
I dont do facebook for all sorts of reasons so this place is my first real interaction with a social network - I am stunned at how good it feels thanks to everyone who has taken the time to look at my posts it really does feel friendly here.

tugrin

Feel quite positive yesterday was a totally NO SPEND DAY and today I have only spent 67p on a stamp! Maybe I'm not the hopeless spendaholic/spendthrift that I thought I was- only 4 days to go to pay day and then I'm digging in for the long haul - got all my CCCS forms and letters filled in and ready to post, Do i need to send some token payments to the creditors before CCCS get in touch with thei DMP?

RAS

tugrin wrote: »

I am 55 and yes both my children are grown up but daughter is only in second year at university so still comes home. I moved out of town to a village in December 2009 and my son stayed in the town (he never paid a proper rent while he was with me - I think he though I owed it to him for all the 'things they neve got when they were children' -makes him sound horrible which he isn't really).

OK, do you have room to take a lodger? Even for short periods? There is no tax to pay on the first £370ish per month under the rent a room scheme.

tugrin wrote: »

One of the awkward things is the cottage I bought needs quite a bit of work done and I now find myself in no position to pay for this and have limited DIY skills.

What you mean is that you lack confidence, as yet. Time will tell. And the only place you can go from here is more skilled.