baby wipes bad for baby???

meritaten

I breastfed all three of my children with varying degrees of success! the first baby was BF for six weeks and I stupidly took the advice of the HV and topped up with a bottle instead of increasing feeds as my mum advised! baby was having a growth spurt and seemed to be hungry all the time!
second time I ignored ALL advice from midwives, HVs and anyone else (apart from mum) and purchased a book called 'Breast is Best' having borrowed a few from the library - this one made complete sense to me (and my mum) and it became my bible!
third time I BF for six months and due to my becoming dangerously underweight, my milk drying up had to resort to the bottle (formula NOT alcohol!). worst decision of my life.........my poor son is milk intolerant and no-one would believe me that the bottles made him ill! he developed severe asthma as a result and nearly died a number of times! I blame myself for that.

I think the MW who said to top up because baby had lost 6% of birthweight is talking out of her arris! you can increase feeds or feed for longer but really there is no need to do this if you are feeding on demand (as you should be at this stage - there is time when you both have settled into breastfeeding to establish YOUR own routine).
I would buy your daughter a good book Zaksmum and can recommend Breast is Best (if its still published) other wise I think you can get a list of recommended books on the NCT website.

btw - I dont think you come across as disapproving Zaksmum - rather a bit confused about the advice given - coupled with a reluctance to offer your daughter advice unless you believe that what you are saying is right and that those of us with experience (and common sense) believe in it too!

plumpmouse

My daughter dropped from 6lb 1 at birth to 5lb 10 at 3 days. I breastfed and still am at 6 months.

The baby will put weight back on without the formula more than likely.

With regards breastfeeding - again it is what works for Mum is really what is best for baby. What I will say is that once established breastfeeding is so easy, no messing with bottles, sterilising etc. She may find in the long run that it is all worth it.

Keep encourging her and supporting her in whatever she decides.

With regards to visitor, they need to fit round her and baby not the other way round!

skintchick

zaksmum wrote: »

I'd never say this to my daughter but I can't imagine why she's giving herself all the hassle of breastfeeding. I know it's best for baby and she's determined to get it right...but when mine were babies I just had them straight onto the bottle. You can see how much they're taking and they certainly thrived perfectly well. And I didn't have to do 12 feeds in 24 hours...that'd exhaust any new mum. Baby wipes weren't around then but had they been I'd have used them. Every midwife that comes seems to have a different opinion - the latest said to feed, feed, feed as much as humanly possible to get rid of the last of baby's jaundice. You can't possibly do more than 12 feeds in 24 hours!

I was very young when I had mine and didn't give a stuff what midwives said. I just muddled through and - fortunately - got it right. Makes you wonder though how mums ever coped in centuries gone by when there was no health advice at all but babies still got to grow up strong and healthy.

Oh yes you can! I used to AVERAGE 13 feeds when DD was little, sometimes I did more than that. Really, breastfeeding is SO different to formula feeding, i'd suggest you perhaps read up on it a bit more, try www.kellymom.com or Googling Dr Sear, or Jay Gordon, or Sheila Kitzinger.

If your daughter is determined to get BF right then please do everything you can to support her in that - make her meals, clean her house, be supportive, because Bfing has SO many benefits over formula, for both mum and baby.

onlyroz

zaksmum wrote: »

I'd never say this to my daughter but I can't imagine why she's giving herself all the hassle of breastfeeding.

I think it's really great that your daughter is persisting. Breastfeeding is *not* always easy, but often there is a sort of barrier you have to overcome before it just clicks and suddenly you wondered why you found it so difficult.

meritaten

Zaksmum - from experience I can say with hand on heart - breastfeeding is NOT a hassle! once you have the hang of it (and baby needs to get the hang of it too) then its the MOST WONDERFUL experience a woman can have! its worth the sore nipples (they soon toughen up though), the going from twiggy to dolly parton in less than a minute! the occasional overfull breasts (when baby decides sleep is preferable to feeds), the leaking when you hear a baby cry (not just yours but ANY baby)! all that fades into insignificance when YOU feed YOUR baby, and the feeling of connectedness is indescribable!

and once you do get the hang of it - its much easier than sterilising bottles, making up feeds etc. breast milk is always available, always the right temprature, the container feels nice and it makes mum SIT down and RELAX!

The best advice IMHO you can give your daughter is..............feed baby when its hungry, take the opportunity to feed and water yourself, relax and enjoy it and DONT listen to people unless they have breastfed a baby themselves! sorry if that includes you zaksmum! I know you are trying to do your best for your daughter!

skintchick

meritaten wrote: »

DONT listen to people unless they have breastfed a baby themselves! !

Yes yes and yes again! Can I add, unless they have SUCCESSFULLY breastfed a baby for a period of several months minimum, NOT tried it for a week and gave up.

Seriously though, other people's experiences are so helpful, which is why a baby cafe or dropin is so useful to go to.

meritaten

TY skintchick!
I dont usually tell people this as their reactions range from disgust to sheer amazement - but I breastfed my second child for nearly three years. if thats not successful i dont know what is! and he wasnt the easiest child in the world! cranky best described him for his first five years!

zaksmum

Thank you meritaten, plumpmouse, skintchick and onlyroz. I'd do anything for my daughter and always have so it's hurtful to be accused of being disapproving. I love her to bits and will help in any way I possibly can and she knows this. She's doing amazingly well and I admire her so much.

I posted originally because I was astounded that baby wipes were considered bad for a baby but I now realise why.

It's certainly not a blog! However , Nikki,you are the only person who has seen fit to be so critical of my genuine attempts to educate myself in the ways of modern parenting.

Thanks to everyone who's been so helpful, I do feel much better informed now.

skintchick

zaksmum wrote: »

Thank you meritaten, plumpmouse, skintchick and onlyroz. I'd do anything for my daughter and always have so it's hurtful to be accused of being disapproving. I love her to bits and will help in any way I possibly can and she knows this. She's doing amazingly well and I admire her so much.

I posted originally because I was astounded that baby wipes were considered bad for a baby but I now realise why.

It's certainly not a blog! However , Nikki,you are the only person who has seen fit to be so critical of my genuine attempts to educate myself in the ways of modern parenting.

Thanks to everyone who's been so helpful, I do feel much better informed now.

I hope I haven;t accused you of anything, and i don;t think you are disapproving, but because you don't have experience of breastfeeding you see it as hard work, which could be undermining of her, but of course if you never voice this to her then it won;t be!

I think you are trying your hardest to understand her methods, which is to your credit, and with your support i'm sure she will succeed in what she wants to do and how she wants to parent.

Please don't be put off posting - we do want to help.

GobbledyGook

zaksmum - a mother who cares enough to educate herself on the 'new' ways would have been an amazing thing for me. I'm sure your daughter will be very grateful once the newborn fog lifts.

Formula isn't the devil's work and I would never dream of criticising anyone who couldn't manage and ended up using it. Your daughter has done more than a lot of people, who would have given up one the first or second day of cluster feeding.

I always tell any new mum who asks me that the best thing about breastfeeding is the lack of faff. You don't need to bother with sterilising, fiddling with teats and bottle top, no need to worry about heating or cooling bottles and you can never go out and forget to put your boobs in the change bag! And once you get the hang of it you can feed lying down on your bed reading a mag, chilling or catching up on some tv.