Stepson stealing- advice please..

cavework

What is so hard to understand? He is 11 years old
You can beat him to within an inch of his life .. all you will get is resentment and more problems.
This lad is a step son as the OP has pointed out and personally all I can see is the OP finding nothing but problems with him.
OP can I ask what are his good points?

Fang_3

Why are you leaving an 11 year old in the house alone for any amount of time? He obviously cannot be trusted so ship him off to a child minder and remove every single one of his privileges. This is not an age thing - this is a naughty child and he needs punishing. Don't make excuses for his behaviour, he's a thief and it needs nipping in the bud.

cavework

Fang wrote: »

Why are you leaving an 11 year old in the house alone for any amount of time? He obviously cannot be trusted so ship him off to a child minder and remove every single one of his privileges. This is not an age thing - this is a naughty child and he needs punishing. Don't make excuses for his behaviour, he's a thief and it needs nipping in the bud.

and when he is 15... post on here again about the even worse problems you will be getting.

Fang_3

cavework wrote: »

and when he is 15... post on here again about the even worse problems you will be getting.

Yes because discipline is a dirty word.:rotfl:

He's a scummy little thief who steals from everyone. Do you think that the kids in his class don't know and haven't told their parents? Do you think they won't share this information with other parents?

Don't act and stop this behaviour and then the problems will really begin.

Bennifred

macchicken wrote: »

What at nightmare!
My nephew was caught stealing at school and my SIL took him down to the police station (she explained before hand to the police the situatuion) and got them to put him in a cell and gave him a right talking to!
He never stole again!
All I can advise it the usual, praise good behaviour to reinforce it and swift consistant punnishment for bad behaviour (without making it attention)
Good luck!

This is a good idea - and the police are happy to help nip illegal behaviour in the bud. It's actually (sadly!) quite a common thing for them to be asked to do.

ailuro2

Losing the rag and beating them doesn't does any good.... my sibling was smacked, beaten, belted ( and so was I when the sibling managed to do a good job of persuading the parents I'd done something too) and it does not work...

kids are not going to listen more intently to anyone who beats them, they will just end up with the same problems (but at least they'll have someone to blame their problems on when they're older)

cavework

Scummy little thief?
Do you know this kid personally? Do you know what or how he feels?
This scummy little thief has had to grow up with a step parent with no knowledge of his biological father who does not seem interested.
He is now 11 years old and as far as I can see his step father cannot find a grown up way to deal with him apart from using a web cam!
Who is the adult here?
as it's you fang and you love to be devils advocate I won't argue the point any further
Sorry Fang the thank you was a slip of the finger..

Fang_3

cavework wrote: »

Scummy little thief?
Do you know this kid personally? Do you know what or how he feels?
This scummy little thief has had to grow up with a step parent with no knowledge of his biological father who does not seem interested.
He is now 11 years old and as far as I can see his step father cannot find a grown up way to deal with him apart from using a web cam!
Who is the adult here?
as it's you fang and you love to be devils advocate I won't argue the point any further
Sorry Fang the thank you was a slip of the finger..

Yes, scummy little thief. We're not talking about just taking a few sweets from the jar in the kitchen - we're talking stealing a DS, things from his classmates at school, his step-sister's belongings.

The OP wanted proof of his step-son's stealing because said step-son is a bare faced liar who denies everything and he can't deny video proof.

Obviously you think this level of stealing should be at best ignored, but that says far more about you than anyone else.:)

conradmum

Am I the only one dismayed to read the OP's reference to 'my stepson' and 'my daughter'. This child has no father and the only person who could act like a father to him clearly doesn't even like him. No wonder he's stealing things.

Try treating him like part of your family rather than an unwanted burden and you might find him more responsive to you in turn.

Fang_3

conradmum wrote: »

Am I the only one dismayed to read the OP's reference to 'my stepson' and 'my daughter'. This child has no father and the only person who could act like a father to him clearly doesn't even like him. No wonder he's stealing things.

Try treating him like part of your family rather than an unwanted burden and you might find him more responsive to you in turn.

Correct me if I'm wrong but aren't they the right terms? He is his step-son and she is his daughter.

Why are you trying to excuse this child's behaviour? It's no one's fault, but his own, especially after being repeatedly informed that his behaviour is wrong.