New House Misery

darkpool

Why would I crawl under a stone? There wouldn't be enough space anyway, it's full of single mums.

no housing priority for single teen mums = no teen mums

ILW

darkpool wrote: »

Why would I crawl under a stone? There wouldn't be enough space anyway, it's full of single mums.

no housing priority for single teen mums = no teen mums

I truly believe that there is a large element of truth to that.

Cause and effect etc.

There were very few single teen mums in the 50s and 60s, why has it changed so much?

JuniorSherlock

ILW, in the 50s and 60s it was not uncommon for mothers to have 7 or 8 children either.

We have only ourselves as a society to blame. Teenagers consider it normal to go out, get plastered and sleep with as many people as they can. In the 50s and 60s it was much more restrained and sex was largely reserved for marriage.
Single mums had their children taken away from them and put up for adoption or they were forced to get abortions by horrified families.

I know darkpool would probably want to return to that era and if I could make that happen for him I would, only I would change him to a female just for a laugh.

Something does need to be done, but merely shaking your head and tutting is not solving the problem. I note that whilst you are happy to make generalisations about teen mums you are not so happy to comment on the proposals I put forward for dealing with the problem. Perhaps because you are far happier to cast judgement than to enter into a discussion about practical and compassionate solutions. Easy option once again.

spendapennyortwo

I would personally have a problem buying a newbuild. They are tiny inside, the bedrooms are far too small (at all the developments I've seen so far!). IMO you get more for your money if you buy an ex-council house.
SOrry to OP about your situation, it's not a great place to be in. Hope things get sorted out soon otherwise you may want to move on.

darkpool

parenting courses? what are you going to teach in these course? basics like don't give your kids superbrew to drink? you really think spending billions on these classes is a wise investment. what happens if they don't attend the course? you going to stop their benefits?

after 10 years at school some of these teen mums can barely sign their benefit books. you think night classes will turn them into that nun from the sound of music?

"three strikes and you are out" again would a do gooder like yourself really throw them out their house?

superficially your ideas sound ok, then when you think about them they really are poor.

JuniorSherlock

Better than your idea of sticking them all in a workhouse, oh yes I can really see that working. Durrr!

Parenting courses have been successful in the past as it encourages a community amongst the parents and they usually end up supporting each other and passing on ideas. Yes sometimes you really do have to teach them basic things like how to cook simple meals and how to discipline a child because they've not grown up with good parenting so they really have no idea.

If they refuse to attend then social services would get involved and they would only be able to get their child benefit paid in vouchers for childrens clothes and food to stop them spending it on alcohol and cigarettes.

As for the council houses, yes three strikes and you are out - the mother would then have to be placed on a register with social services and live in a hostel for a while until attitudes improve and she is willing to accept help. There are mother and baby units out there but the government is busy planning to shut them all down.

Create incentives for mothers to return to work or education by providing free creches (another funding cut by the government that penalises single mums who want to get out of the poverty trap) and perhaps a benefit rise whilst they are in education or whilst they are training for work. Offer them real solutions that will work instead of just condemning them.

Yes ideas like that need work and no one solution will ever be perfect, but it's better than your suggestions.

pelirocco

evoke wrote: »

^ Hear, hear.

Avoid living next door to families with lots of kids. They will grow up to terrorise you. The ideal neghbours are a middle-aged, house-proud couple whose kids have grown up and flown the nest. That's in my experience and in my opinion, of course. The worst possible neighbours are single teenage-mums. You can bet your life that they'll be junkies, on the dole, loud and chavvy.

Unless of course you have kids , then they can be the neighbours from hell :rotfl:

ILW

JuniorSherlock wrote: »

Better than your idea of sticking them all in a workhouse, oh yes I can really see that working. Durrr!

Parenting courses have been successful in the past as it encourages a community amongst the parents and they usually end up supporting each other and passing on ideas. Yes sometimes you really do have to teach them basic things like how to cook simple meals and how to discipline a child because they've not grown up with good parenting so they really have no idea.

If they refuse to attend then social services would get involved and they would only be able to get their child benefit paid in vouchers for childrens clothes and food to stop them spending it on alcohol and cigarettes.

As for the council houses, yes three strikes and you are out - the mother would then have to be placed on a register with social services and live in a hostel for a while until attitudes improve and she is willing to accept help. There are mother and baby units out there but the government is busy planning to shut them all down.

Create incentives for mothers to return to work or education by providing free creches (another funding cut by the government that penalises single mums who want to get out of the poverty trap) and perhaps a benefit rise whilst they are in education or whilst they are training for work. Offer them real solutions that will work instead of just condemning them.

Yes ideas like that need work and no one solution will ever be perfect, but it's better than your suggestions.

Cannot help but think it would be better to actively discourage the growth in single parent households which are unable to support themselves without state handouts.

OK stuff does happen but the massive increase over the last few decades is not all down to divorce and husbands dying.

JuniorSherlock

No, it's down to a change of attitude within society. However on the plus side you no longer have such large families of around 8 kids.

Educate children about ideals and self respect, spot early signs of abuse and get all departments such as schools, social services and the health sector communicating properly to deal with issues early on. Incentives to stay on in education or to go out to work - all of these will help prevent teenage pregnancies. What the government is doing at the moment will not. The poorer you make people, the more they feel they have nothing to lose.

ILW

JuniorSherlock wrote: »

No, it's down to a change of attitude within society. However on the plus side you no longer have such large families of around 8 kids.

Educate children about ideals and self respect, spot early signs of abuse and get all departments such as schools, social services and the health sector communicating properly to deal with issues early on. Incentives to stay on in education or to go out to work - all of these will help prevent teenage pregnancies. What the government is doing at the moment will not. The poorer you make people, the more they feel they have nothing to lose.

Would this be the society that accuses anyone who thinks that it is wrong to breed with no means of supporting ones children of being "judgemental"?. Until theer is a sense of right and wrong, nothing will change.