Buyers are camped in our garden over Christmas

azkaban420

You have done far too much already so it would be awful if they did pull out now. Fingers crossed for a positive end to this story!

Az

ILW

If they do not exchange on the 4th, I would put the place back on the market ASAP.

diable

thejonesfamily wrote: »

Exchange of contracts due on 4th. However, a fly in the ointment.

We went to the pub last night, I was going to post the pub we were going to so people could say hello but I realised that if someone was to come over and talk to us, Mr Clampett would wonder what is going on.

As I feared it turned into a session on marital coaching.

Turns out that he had an affair last year. The Mrs caught him when the Camper was parked down lovers lane and her sister was driving her back from shopping. In Devon, there are some remote places and a white camper can easily be spotted.

She apparantly walked up to the side of the camper and watched him devouring the woman from the surgery but Mrs C went back home without saying a word.

It was only after a month, she decided to exact her revenge on him accompanying him to the surgery when he had an ingrowing toe nail. They approached the counter where the woman was sitting and when the lady asked Mr C who he was, Mrs C shouted through the surgery, "so you know how big my husbands pen is is, but you don't know his name"

Well, Mr C promptly left the surgery with Mrs C in tow and they went home and he confessed. Mrs C agreed she was at fault for not working at the marriage and apparantly, running up the debt buying flash TVs and a puppy was her way with pleasing him, coping and sticking two fingers up to the situation.

This was the reason that they had to leave Devon. Apparantly (i didnt say Dinas was the same) but everyone knows everyones business and they couldnt face going into town again as they felt everyone was gossiping.

So there you have it.

They are 20k in the red and after quite a few drinks, which he paid for amazingly, he asked me whether we would drop our price by 20k in view of the "collapsing market" and the need for a new kitchen.

I have told them no as we are quite far on in the process and suggested he raise a small mortgage when they move here.

Anyway, the drive home was a bit quiet. We pulled up in the driveway to find that Mrs C had left Mr C's belongings in the driveway which I didnt see until I ran over them, so now he is in my spare room donning my pajamas whilst I try and figure out our/his next move.

I'd be careful he doesn't make a play for your missus........

This is a classic and I think this thread could be turned in to a film script :T:rotfl:

marking_bad

This is a joke thread, right?

giddypenguin

thejonesfamily wrote: »

the first post sets out the timelines for exchange. No clanger dropped. We are just desperate to get this done now.

In a previous thread, you said you had already exchanged, I think that's what they were referring to.

giddypenguin

TBeckett100 wrote: »

oh that was a bit of wind up post. I didnt realise until now that would seem tame.

..... What?

debrag

They won't be buying if the marriage is over.

ess0two

Whiteknight wrote: »

When are we going to see "evidence" of this motor home, surely the OP can work out how to resize the image. And of course now that the motor home is back the unwelcome house guests can move back into it unless it is more entertaining to let them remain in the house?

On a more serious note how long did it take you to decide to keep the dog, it would appear that it was a decision you came to while driving to the police station to get motor home - don't you think you should have discussed it with your wife/partner first?

Which police station was he taken to out of interest?

Lighten up,its fun reading.

giddypenguin

CheeseCat wrote: »

Are you the real Mr Jones?

This thread (although probably a total joke) has kept me amused for the past few days :T

I suspect that may be the case, as that poster hasn't posted anything on this thread before...

Bit of a strange fantasy all this...

giddypenguin

Apologies then...

I don't believe this story at all... surely if this story (camper drink driving) went to the press there'd be a link to it on the interweb somewhere...