Running out of time, needing to borrow in time for xmas...

TUS

TUS wrote: »

This is it!!! After your windfall ... you did some good things. Cleared debts, put a deposit down, etc. However, you continued to spend beyond your means AFTER you had spent the £50k. That was a mistake. It was at that point you should have done the right thing and started budgetting to only spend what you could afford.

So this is entirely your fault and you HAVE NOT tried and tested what people are suggesting. You just think you have.

I'm still furious you suggested someone ELSE go bankrupt for you. How is that honest?? Seriously - do what has been suggested or go bankrupt yourself.

Those are your ONLY options. This thread will continue until you lose Internet access through non-payment of your bills, which will shortly be followed by you and your family being made homeless.

I really hope your wife finds a real man and leaves you before then.

Am I being unfair?

JulieGeorgiana

TUS wrote: »

Am I being unfair?

Um...... No!

ciscokid

TUS wrote: »

I'm still furious you suggested someone ELSE go bankrupt for you. How is that honest?? Seriously - do what has been suggested or go bankrupt yourself

Whats that old game called again, chinese whispers? The same reason after crashing my car (read, clipping the back of a van) uninsured I had friends in work who would no longer talk to me because I was drink driving in a stolen car without a license and smashed into an oncoming car whilst driving out of control...

TUS wrote: »

I really hope your wife finds a real man and leaves you before then.

We're not married (thats 20k saved right there), the door has been in the same place for 11 years....as daft as she is at least she is a bit more tolerant of others.

CHR15

Cisco - You've been posting for a few days now, the posts have been made throughout the working day since the start.

What is it that you do for a living exactly?

As a self proclaimed expert in your field, one which any company will flourish under your consultation - how is it you don't seem to be doing anything during the day apart from posting on here?

If you DO work for a living - maybe you keep getting sacked as you are loafing on the interent all day.

In my experience, companies don't like to let the best emplyees leave, as soon as a new offer arrives, a counter offer is made to try to retain his/her services.

Nobody seems to do this with you - the door appears to be always open, no matter what job you are doing.

Maybe far from being the innovative pusher of boundaries, your incomprehensible stubborness will prevent you from ever holding a job for a reasonable length of time.

You won't accept the computer says no! so you simply try the same thing repeatedly.
How many times would you try to put a screw in with your fingers before giving up and getting a screwdriver?

When you fail the first time, the best (and most successful) people try to find another way to their goal.
Your attitude to work is the same as to finances, if at first you fail, try the same approach again and again and again.

You're a blinkered fool who will soon be without family or home.

Accept you are not a winner and never were, but a loser. I think you have convinced yourself you are the bees knees to such an extent, you are completely brainwashed.

Only professional help can turn this around.

dreamdreamer

Just an observation:

more than one person has stated here I clearly have problems that go beyond the norm...but in person I can assure you I come across a lot more intelligent than I obviously am so can never get help with this side of my life....

This is rubbish. I am extremely "intelligent" person, I have a highly skilled job, an IQ of 145, I'm well educated and come across as so (or so I like to think!). HOWEVER, anyone can have mental health problems and addictions (in your case anxiety problems and gambling) and if you go to your GP, explain your difficulties (being intelligent should help here!) and ask for a referral for therapy or for info on Gambling Anonymous meetings you WILL get it, regardless of how intelligent you are or how high your income is. I spent 3 years on medication and in psychotherapy, counselling and CBT. It turned my life around.

Maybe a bit of talk therapy will help you deal with your "bereavement/guilt/hurt/anger/frustration" and put you in a better place to deal with your financial difficulties. And much as you promise you can't be in financial difficulty as you are well-paid, you ARE in difficulty. And you're not even that well paid. Median earnings of full-time male employees were £538 per week in April 2010 (taken from National Statistics Online). That's £2400 a month, probably roughly what you earn gross. Your income is around the middle for the UK.

I understand the pull of a consolidation loan - I got one myself (and then cancelled every credit card and my overdraft to avoid re-spending). But you're not going to get one. You need to explore some of the alternative suggestions put to you in this thread.

ciscokid

I have absolutely no self confidence and no self belief and usually try to leave jobs the second the word "promotion" is mentioned....I already mentioned I entered into a job in which I had absolutely no experience. I didnt go to university. I didnt get particularly good grades at school. You are absolutely right that frantically spending time on the internet trying to find the answer to my problems has caused me a lot of difficulty in my work in the past, this is half the reason i am so scared and would just like this to be resolved as quickly and painless as possible, i simply dont need the stress on top of the stress of being completely out of my depth in my job. Everyday is a challenge and a bluff, I have never understood how I have been able to pull it off for so long, but the others around me in my work seem to have more faith and confidence in my abilities than I do, and have always backed my up 100% in that side of me, so I succeeed here. Its the dark side off al the stress and stuff I don't understand in the background that raises questions and challenges peoples patience with me to the extent that it finally destroys any good relation i have with employers and colleagues.

I have not convinced myself I am the bees knees....but after years of doubting myself to everyone I thought I would try something I don't like and try to be a bit more confident about my abilities and try and let them sell myself. I absolute abhor self praise, I cannot stand things like appraisals in work, Im just there to do my bit and make my money as far as Im concerned, and all I always find people who aren't like this to be the most arrogant POS on this earth...which I why i always avoid from trying to come across like this (and being honest, it affects my confidence greatly as i am always 110% self concious about just how i am being perceived)...and what happens the second I try to not look like the loser i am...everyone calls me arrogant. yet again, something that works for other peopl fails for me.

I hope you take pride in calling people losers over the internet and kicking them when youre down.Just realise while its a quick 3 second feel good thrill for yourself, there is actually a real person at the other end of the computer reading all this..

ILW

Why do you refuse to accept any of the advice given on here?

HAYLEY8005

Well do as you have been told open another bank account and get it sorted now instead of writing on net making excuses , you have been shown how yet have done nothing more fool you i say

petebates26

Ciscokid,

I've read this entire thread and things seem to have become a bit unclear to me.

Could you please briefly summarise exactly what it is you're hoping to achieve by posting? (Bearing in mind that the people here aren't lenders, so even if you convince us that a consolidation loan is the way forward it's not relevant, as a loan is clearly not an option)

Former_MSE_Alana

Hi folks,

We are closing this thread due to resource issues.

MSE Alana