can you help resolve a disagreement please

jane130

Ok my and my husband have differing opinions on the subject of My daughter boyfriends birthday .

they have been together 4 years and live together.

If it were your daughter and potential future son in law would you buy him a birthday gift ?

jakes-mum

if they live together then they are in a serious relationship and he is now near enough you son in law (i assume thats where they are heading too) so he is a member of your family. I would buy him a gift

bluenose1

Definitely, think it would be rude not to. Doesn't have to be anything expensive - Lynx giftset etc.

7roland8

Yes - but why ask after 4yrs?? Would have been giving a small gift from yr one.

zippybungle

Yes definately.
Doesn't have to be expensive. Something like chocolate or beers maybe?

Zippy x

podperson

Me and OH have been together a good few years and my mum and dad just send him a card for his birthday and buy him a gift for xmas. His parents do the same for me (although they normally just give money at xmas). We're all quite happy with that. Think it makes sense since they don't really see him at his birthday but usually do at least around xmas. Especially since we now live quite a distance away so they would need to post a gift.

peaz

7roland8 wrote: »

Yes - but why ask after 4yrs?? Would have been giving a small gift from yr one.

I agree.

It doesn't have to be anything big but I'd definitely be getting something from when they started going out.

pookiewn

My OH and I have been living together for five years now and my mum and dad send a card for birthdays, unless it's a special one. But we do see each other at Christmas and they get him a stocking and a pressie. However his mum and dad tend to give me money for my birthday, but that has only happened in the past couple of years. I would say yes, but agree it just needs to be something small. What does your daughter think?

jcr16

i met my hubby in the may, and it was my 20th birthday in the sep. My future inlaws ( we got engaged on my b-day) bought me loads. and every birthday and xmas they have spent the same on me as they do their son. they treat me as their dd. were a fairly close family so maybe this is why.

LJM

definately yes if they have been together 4 years and living together i think personally it would be mean not to

MrsTinks

I'd say definitely yes... as said it doesn't have to be expensive, but if you want him to feel part of the family for many years to come then treat him like it... why make him feel like an outsider?