O/S disasters.... let us share...

floyd

I have just remembered one of my absolute corkers!
Made chicken noodle soup for tea and thought it would be lovely to have in work for lunch the next day. I poured the leftovers into my thermos flask and left it on the kitchen counter.
At 2am I was woken by what I thought was a shotgun going off in the house and as OH was in work I was left to investigate myself. So I creep downstairs armed with a large Maglite torch ready to club someone over the head and hear a strange dripping/plopping noise in the kitchen.
I turn on the light and the entire kitchen is plastered in chicken noodle soup, I am standing.... in my pants..... holding a torch.... with noodles plopping onto my head....

Moral of the story, don't put lukewarm soup into a thermos, it will ferment and explode all over your kitchen.....

Gingernutmeg

Not a strictly OS disaster, but when I was younger (much younger, I hasten to add ) I bought a bottle of still lemonade. I tried it and hated it as it was too sour, so I decided to do a bit of 'kitchen science' and turn it into fizzy lemonade. First I added a LOT of sugar to the lemonade which made it taste better (sort of) and then I decided that I needed something to add the fizz. I went rooting in the kitchen cupboards and came back with the bicarb, baking powder and vinegar. I added a bit of bicarb, shook it and nothing happened, and it still tasted the same. So I added a bit more. And then a bit more. And then a bit more.

At that point I tasted it and it was horrible, so I thought if I added a bit more bicarb and some baking powder AND some vinegar (and the end of a rather fizzy Jif squeezy lemon) then that might help, so I filled up the bottle with everything and poured in the vinegar. Then I screwed the lid on tight and shook the bottle - really, really hard. BIG MISTAKE. There was an almighty BANG and the bottle literally exploded, and the lid shot off and embedded itself in the polystyrene ceiling tiles. I was covered in the 'lemonade', and so was the kitchen - the kitchen cabinets were covered in sticky goo, which set into rather pretty crystals that were an absolute pain to clean off. My mum, who ran into the kitchen on hearing the bang, was confronted with a sticky, dripping, wailing little girl and a very, very, very, messy kitchen. I was in trouble

So, the lesson here is - do not try to make your own lemonade with still lemonade, bicarb, baking powder and vinegar. I've tried it for you and can categorically say it doesn't work

Skint_Catt

floyd wrote: »

I have just remembered one of my absolute corkers!
Made chicken noodle soup for tea and thought it would be lovely to have in work for lunch the next day. I poured the leftovers into my thermos flask and left it on the kitchen counter.
At 2am I was woken by what I thought was a shotgun going off in the house and as OH was in work I was left to investigate myself. So I creep downstairs armed with a large Maglite torch ready to club someone over the head and hear a strange dripping/plopping noise in the kitchen.
I turn on the light and the entire kitchen is plastered in chicken noodle soup, I am standing.... in my pants..... holding a torch.... with noodles plopping onto my head....

Moral of the story, don't put lukewarm soup into a thermos, it will ferment and explode all over your kitchen.....

:rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

Skint_Catt

Gingernutmeg - I've just snorted my Diet Coke all over my office desk! Too funny! :rotfl: :rotfl: :rotfl:

furball

When i was about ten i got a lovely lamp for my bedroom . When the bulb went i decided to change it myself. Couldn't remember if the lamp was on or off so i put my finger in the bulb socket. The resounding bang as i hit the wall on the other side of the room had my dad running up stairs to play heck with me for making all that noise. When he realised i was ok he couldn't stop laughing. He wasn't laughing 6 months later though. I had been invited to go on holiday with mum's friend and their children so they decided to redecorate my bedroom whilst i was away. Dad took the paper off the wall and the plaster fell of exposing the latts. The whole wall needed replastering.:eek:

My Darling OH has put up with a lot but the best has to be when i got a range cooker at less than half price. Was fed up of it being in the kitchen but not fixed to the gas. I had a single cooker with the washing machine next to it. I replumbed the washer but the sink cupboard was in the way so i took it out. Fitted the range cooker in but the base cupboard at the other side was in the way. (only had 2 base cupboards and a wall unit originally in the kitchen at that time) so i decided to take that out. Wall unit had to come down as it was now above the cookeer. Hubby came home from work to kitchen with cooker in washer replumbed and 2 taps on the wall:rotfl:

Skint_Catt

LOL, at furball - well done on the plumbing! When I started reading i had the feeling that you were going to say you pluged the range into the water inlet!
:rotfl: Not a cooking one, but my Mum's always been good at encouraging Dad to do DIY (i.e. starting it then he has to finish) When they moved into their current house (28years ago!) the longue extension was a 32' long room and along one of the longest walls was the most 70's brick fireplace and chimney breast which extended either side to a mantelpiece the full length of the room. About 15 years ago, Mum got sick of the sight of it and just started taking bricks off the chimney breast, lol. She got halfway ddown towards the gas fireplace then got Dad to finish the job putting in a gorgeous new oak mantle and inset fire :rotfl:

sistercas

I made a spag bol as a teenager. instead of using mixed herbs i put mixed spice in and when I drained the spaghetti I dropped the whole lot onto the stone floor.I just scooped it back up and served it to my unsuspecting family. my brother thought it was the best spag bol he had ever had! :rotfl:

Hollyberry

I am sure I have plenty of cooking disasters, but they are escaping me at the moment. My most spectacular O/S failure was buying my greenfingered mum a plastic hexagonal greenhouse, and thinking that OH and I (neither of us a dab hand at DIY) could put it up successfully.

It looked like a greenhouse when we were done. Neither DH or I had injured ourselves or one another in the process. My mum had a productivity drive, and things were growing. There were nicely labelled seedlings, tidy stacks of pots and grow bags, all looking serene.

Until the windy night when I peeped out into the garden, and saw my mum halfway down the path, stradding the greenhouse - I didn't know her little legs could stretch that far - with green plastic ballooning around her. For a moment, I could have sworn she was going to take off, rather like that guy from the Darwin awards who took flight in a deckchair attached to weather balloons. OH and I charged down the garden to help. Five minutes later, the three of us had mounted the greenhouse, and were trying frantically to squish its over-inflated plastic into the shed.

It's not been out again since. We've now got a little greenhouse that fits against the wall. And which is weighted down with three bags of fertilizer.

stormchaos

If making mash potato DON'T use a hand blender if you can't find the masher !!
it turns into the most revolting slimey goo, tried adding flour then frying,
nope,
so added more flour and an egg,
nope still revolting,
its had a night sitting in the kitchen and has had porridge oats and water added and is now bubbling away on the cooker , in the hope the chickens will eat it later

so much for 'cheap' mash potato !

Olliebeak

stormchaos wrote: »

If making mash potato DON'T use a hand blender if you can't find the masher !! it turns into the most revolting slimey goo.........

About 20 yrs ago, a work colleague and myself were cooking a Christmas Lunch for 25 pensioners and one of our 'so-called helpers' started on a pan of potatoes with her own whizzie-stick - her idea NOT ours. Fortunately there were another two pans of spuds plus a couple of trays of roasties and she wasn't asked to help the following year :rolleyes:.




Yesterday evening, I decided to attempt the Weetabix Cake recipe that I found on here. When reading it, it didn't quite 'sound right' to me, (no marge/butter or eggs ) so, in my infinite wisdom, I decided to 'adapt' it. I creamed margarine and egg together and then continued with the recipe pretty much as stated. Well, it smelled good and looked good although it was in the oven about 15 minutes longer than stated. After taking it out of the tin to cool, it deflated a little on the top. When cold I decided to wrap it in clingfilm and tinfoil before putting in my cake tin, that's when it broke in half and then started to disintegrate before my very eyes :eek:.

Oh well another lesson learned - never experiment with a recipe until AFTER you've tried it in it's basic form first! Will get served in chunks covered with custard as a dessert this evening .