Nice people thread part 3- Nice as pie

PasturesNew

To be honest, I want her shovelled into some supported living, where she gets to chat to other people. She's spent a lifetime in our bizarre household, cut off from normal people/company/conversation

silvercar

PN, sympathies to you.

You can call the Samaritans 24/7 on

08457909090 you can also email them jo@samaritans.org


May help if you just want to talk and don't know what to say.

I know they were very helpful when a friend was in a similar situation to you. It means you can talk without someone judging what you are saying.

vivatifosi

PasturesNew wrote: »

To be honest, I want her shovelled into some supported living, where she gets to chat to other people. She's spent a lifetime in our bizarre household, cut off from normal people/company/conversation

That may do her the world of good or may be a massive culture shock! At least you can raise it and then she can do the talking with adult care services. One thing my Mum does (I'm more or less the same age as you) is that she never stops being a parent, worrying whether I eat enough, get enough sleep, meet the wrong people through work. You would think I'd just learned to tie my shoelaces and shouldn't be let out the house by myself (thank god she doesn't know the truth).... Even if she doesn't say it, if yours is the same you might just need to say "look, I'm a grown up, do what's right for you for a change, you won't be here for ever, I'm going to have to look after myself anyway so you might as well be comfortable in the right place for you". I hasten to add mine is a stubborn old bird and would then ignore anything that I say, but hey, that's what olds are for - being a bit cantankerous.

vivatifosi

I'm signing off now, night all!

neverdespairgirl

PN, I know it's not much help, but we're all thinking of you <hugs>

Generali

I'm still awake and thinking positive thoughts for you PN.

PasturesNew

silvercar wrote: »

PN, sympathies to you.

You can call the Samaritans 24/7 on

08457909090 you can also email them [EMAIL="jo&#64;samaritans.org"]jo@samaritans.org[/EMAIL]


May help if you just want to talk and don't know what to say.

I know they were very helpful when a friend was in a similar situation to you. It means you can talk without someone judging what you are saying.

I hate the Samaritans, I've had two very bad experiences in the past.

1] All they said was "and how do you feel about that?",which made me feel worse
2] I went into one of their places about 4 years ago - and they ended up turfing me out as they were 24 hours but locked the doors after 10pm or something. But the person was rubbish anyway.

It is hard to make any calls, everything is monitored, questioned, queried. "You've got a letter" and are expected to open it in front of them and say what's in it.... "Who were you talking to on the phone?" and you have to go into great detail. Everything is questioned/queried, monitored.

PasturesNew

I can't even cry, as it'd be heard. And I can't drive somewhere to do that in case somebody stops to find out why my car's parked in a field/wherever. And then you get red eyes, so I couldn't come back.... for hours. And then I'd have to explain every minute of the time I was away and where I'd been/what I'd been doing.



That's what I miss most about not having my own space - not being able to cry when I want.

vivatifosi

PasturesNew wrote: »

I can't even cry, as it'd be heard. And I can't drive somewhere to do that in case somebody stops to find out why my car's parked in a field/wherever. And then you get red eyes, so I couldn't come back.... for hours. And then I'd have to explain every minute of the time I was away and where I'd been/what I'd been doing.



That's what I miss most about not having my own space - not being able to cry when I want.

Morning Pastures. I hope you managed to get some sleep and don't feel too tired this morning. It sounds like your family are very good at the whole "stiff upper lip" thing. Don't worry about crying though, it is a human emotion. We all do it and from a totally logical point of view, if we weren't meant to, we wouldn't have been designed with tear ducts.

Also don't forget if you do want to retreat to your room, that Aspies have a more acute sense of hearing so people may not hear you as much as you think, particularly if they are prone to watching the TV very loud as seems to be the case. Take a couple of tea bags, soak them in cool but not cold water and put them over your eyes, they do wonders at soothing sore eyes.

LydiaJ

Morning Pastures.
Will be thinking and praying for you today.
Wish there was more I could do to help.