Relationship ended advice

shellsuit

What are you paying her £100 a month for?!

randombetas

what i owe her from the £3950

shellsuit

randombetas wrote: »

what i owe her from the £3950

Is she in debt for that amount, or is that what she is saying she wants from you because she spent double that when you were together and she wants half back from you??

randombetas

thats what i built up from her paying for what i could not afford at the time (hoilidas days out ect)

January20

Daxx wrote: »

So basically, when you were with her you were quite prepared for someone working part time to pay for you to go on nice holidays etc, im guessing with a view to you paying her back at some point.

If you werent able to afford the nice luxuries she paid for, then why take advantage of them.

There is no way she can really get this money from you. But pretty spineless that you are prepared to leave a single mum short of money when you have benefited from the holidays etc. and dont want to pay it back.

And if you weren't happy to pay the money she asked of you for bills then why do so at the time. No point moaning afterwards.

That's easy to say but sometimes in a relationship you do feel under pressure to pay for stuff, go on holidays or days out because of your partner, and in this case there were kids involved to so there might have been an amount of emotional blackmail too ie kids missing out if he didn't play ball...

I'm speculating really but it's difficult to say for sure as the OP is quite parsimonious with his information, I mean it took until post 34 before he said he was paying her £100 a month!

shellsuit

randombetas wrote: »

thats what i built up from her paying for what i could not afford at the time (hoilidas days out ect)

So she isn't in debt for this amount of money? ie she doesn't owe it to anyone else?

If so, what on earth are you paying her for? I'm assuming you didn't have her arm behind her back to make her pay for the holidays and days out, did you?

randombetas

no i think she bas healthy bank balances always been a good saver even before me with her ex hubby, yes the holidays where fantastic but in reality i knew and i think she did that i could not afford them

RAS

randombetas wrote: »

what i owe her from the £3950

What written agreement do you have with her about what you "owe" and that you will repay?

January20

randombetas wrote: »

no i think she bas healthy bank balances always been a good saver even before me with her ex hubby, yes the holidays where fantastic but in reality i knew and i think she did that i could not afford them

Well, if she knew you had bad debt and went bankrupt, it would have been obvious wouldn't it? I think she is taking the p, to be honest and you are being too soft paying that money.

I wish I had thought about it as I would be a much richer woman had I done the same to my ex after (10 years together!)

randombetas

nove just a verbal that ill pay as much as i can each mounth