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real life MMD: Should I keep dating for freebies?

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  • A.Jones
    A.Jones Posts: 508 Forumite
    curriej99 wrote: »
    Kind of annoys me this one. As if it's almost acceptable for this woman to be debating it. Imagine if the sexes had been swapped.
    eg. "I've been seeing this bird. She's not much of a looker and to be honest, a bit thick. She goes like a rabbit however, and she's worth a few quid. Should I ditch her and try and find a better one, or keep milking it? Or hey, both?"

    Simple, keep the rich b**ch for your weekly handout, but be careful not to get her up the duff. You don't want munter offspring. Get a better model, keep her secret (maybe "work" nights) and update her every six months or so to keep it fresh.
  • No! What a horrible thing to do to someone! He will probably catch on to you soon enough anyway, there is only so often a guy will take a girl out and foot the bill without atleast wondering why she doesnt offer to pay. Men arent as stupid as some women think they are, they can smell a gold digger quick enough.

    I would accept being treated on the first date, if he asked me out, but would expect to pay if I asked him. After that I would expect to go halves unless it was a birthday treat or similar.
  • shuey wrote: »
    afc poor guy he needs to be a pua

    As an old person who doesn't 'do' text talk, what does this mean?
    Thanks
  • Noooo! You have to be honest with him. If you're not that into him and don't see it going anywhere, just tell him. Preferably face to face or at least by phone. Dumping by text or email is rubbish, as is dumping by just not making contact and hoping they get the hint. Carrying on dating him just so you can get your meals paid for is horrible! And why is he paying for them all anyway?! I always pay half my way, at least after the first date. Just ask yourself how you'd feel if he was saying this stuff about you?! And who knows, you might end up staying friends and he might have a really fit single friend you could date or vice versa. You never know what life's going to throw at you so it's best to be honest and ethical and then at least you've always got that imho. :A
    No Unapproved or Personal links in signatures please - FT3
  • greenval
    greenval Posts: 596 Forumite
    No you should be honest . How would you feel if the situation was reversed?
  • CLGoggin
    CLGoggin Posts: 11 Forumite
    edited 24 November 2010 at 3:32PM
    the fact that you've asked if you should "come clean or enjoy the freebies" shows that you know you are being manipulative and you are looking for some affirmation so you don't feel so bad about doing it. Be honest with him. Stop being a gold digger. If you want to get to know him more but you're not sure it's leading anywhere then tell him that (but it sounds like you are really just in it for the free dinners). An ex-boyfriend once decided to take me on holiday so "see if we still had something". He's already paid for it and just kind of sprung it on me but i knew I didn't feel the same anymore and there was no hope for us. I told him and he accepted it but still wanted to go on holiday as none of his mates could get time off and he just wanted some company. we ended up remaining pretty good friends because it was at least based on honesty. If this guy is a bit lonely then he might be ok with you not wanting to take the relationship any further but without you being honest with him, you are just using him.
  • Make sure you get engaged before you ditch him, so you have a lasting asset in diamond form...
  • Do you really even need to ask?!
    The poor guy probably thinks things are going great and the longer you let him believe this, the harder it's going to be for him when you end it. You say there's no reason to end it but the fact you're not actually interested in him is a very good reason!
    It would be incredibly selfish of you to keep on using this guy just so he'll spend money on you.
  • You need to look at this financially. What level of freebies are you getting in a typical week? From that, you can work out your hourly rate.

    Then you can decide whether it's better to turn professional, use a pimp (accepting you'll pay a cut of earnings but maybe get more business) or just keep it as your current sideline.
  • Talent wrote: »
    You don't have to commit to anything and as long as you don't lead him on, what's the problem??

    You don't think continuing to date him despite lack of interest constitutes leading him on?
This discussion has been closed.
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