Immoral_angel's Debt Diary

daphne_descends

Since when has this site been a place to compete with who has it worse? SEK you might think IA has it easy compared to you but until you've walked in her shoes you're not really in a place to judge.

I'm sure IA has it 'easier' than others. I'm sure you do too. I know I do. But is that why we're here, to discuss who has suffered most? I didn't realise it was a competition.

If you need support and a place to vent then you'll find it on these forums, no doubt. But you have hijacked an otherwise supportive thread and that's a bit of a shame. You could try to relate to IA instead of making aggressive statements about the ease of her life.

katepnlo

I had to comment...I don't think it matters one bit weather someone is a regular member or a brand new member, if someone jumps in on a thread saying you have it easy and keep on about how they have it so much worse it would get backs up. I am sure everyone would defend a new person if a regular did similar to them.
Each and every one of us are/was in a real tough place doesn't make it worse for one than another i am sure we are/was living in a real tough place regardless of different factors involved.
I would do as the others suggested and start a diary.

As for the bass..well i was thinking about this as i am a firm believer that free cycle stuff shouldn't be collected and sold on. BUT if you are intending to fully restore it, to make it a beautifull bass that has been restored to its former glory or beyond..hmmm i think that would be ok to sell because of the hard work and love you put into it...your time...the cost etc..i think that would be fine.
kate

Karmacat

Oh. Its got serious again. Well, this is my serious bit. I think *we* feel protective towards IA because she shares so much of herself and her life on here - the minutiae of the debts, yes, but the budgetting, the arguments, the struggling to get onto a better financial plane with Ste's new job, his driving test, the wedding and the latest pregnancy, agonising about whether to sell her wedding dress. Photos and videos of her children, even. When someone shares the good and the bad with you with such honesty and good humour, you (I!!!) end up respecting and liking that person. She doesn't need protecting in some ways, but I feel it, and so do others.

I don't have any children, and if I did they'd be IA's age: my oldest nephew is 31, my youngest is 19. And compared to IA, they've been spoonfed - thats okay, their parents could afford it, a parent wants to try to make sure that their child has as easy a ride as possible. I am comparing, but I'm not judging, and thats an important difference that maybe you're missing, SEK. You say you're not judging, but "alot of people have it alot harder than IA including myself" (your post today, no4203 on here tonight at 8.59) - thats a judgement, right there.

She has such a sense of humour, allied with such grit, and such intelligence, and such attention to detail most of all - I feel bad for her when her efforts are discounted in this way.

SEK, you've had it hard as you say, and I'm sad for you, you've got an awful situation to cope with everyday. But it seems to me that is kind of colouring what you're saying on this thread. Spud30 suggested you start a thread of your own, and thats a really good idea. I hope you'll take it up, just let yourself ramble on as well as working things out in it, I'm pretty sure IA gets a lot of strength from coming on here, and you can too.

Okay, well, I think I've approached the record length for a post, but .... well, I wanted to say it! So here it is. I'm gonna feel really stupid in about 5 mins, don't mind. I think I've put it as well as I can, and that means I don't go into it more.

SEK_2

tigtag02 wrote: »

SEK
My comments are not intended to be hurtful but in defense of IA.
I am truely sorry to hear about the loss of your mum and the !!!!!! that you have to deal with but you cannot justify hurtful comments with *my life is harder than yours* and to say things like you hope that others have it harder than you just beggers belief.

If you take some of IA's tips rather than looking at holidaying in FLorida and Toronto maybe you can be debt free soon too.

I dont wish to judge or tell you how to lead your life but as the addage goes, you cant have your cake and eat it.

We have not had a holiday for yrs. I have been saving my Tesco clubcard vouchers so we could us them with Virgin holidays. I was only enquiring for when i had enough vouchers. I believe the post are over a year old. Due to teenage bil moving in with us and the problems that he has brought there is no way we could save the spending money though i have enough vouchers saved. I certainly don't have my cake and eat it. You all have took what i have said the wrong way. I am not competing or belittling i was just saying that others do have it harded and i have always said that IA does a good job. I have not judged IA so please dont judge me.

spud30

SEK wrote: »

We have not had a holiday for yrs. I have been saving my Tesco clubcard vouchers so we could us them with Virgin holidays. I was only enquiring for when i had enough vouchers. I believe the post are over a year old. Due to teenage bil moving in with us and the problems that he has brought there is no way we could save the spending money though i have enough vouchers saved. I certainly don't have my cake and eat it. I have not judged IA so please dont judge me.

I'm sorry but you have judged IA by saying that her problems are nowhere near as bad as yours.

tigtag02

spud30 wrote: »

I'm sorry but you have judged IA by saying that her problems are nowhere near as bad as yours.

and I also told you that I wasnt judging you - I think that Karmacats post sums up what most of us are trying to say to you. I suggest that you take a long and hard look at it.

beanielou

spud30 wrote: »

Ermmmmm :rotfl: :rotfl:

What did i say wrong spud??
Sorry, im tired and missing the point.

spud30

beanielou wrote: »

What did i say wrong spud??
Sorry, im tired and missing the point.

You didnt say anything wrong Beanie hun - I'm still thinking about the answer to your question

beanielou

Thanks Spud, was worried there.

spud30

beanielou wrote: »

Thanks Spud, was worried there.

Awww dont worry