I can do this.................I AM doing it!

Snowdonlily

Thanks Maman............a hug from DS3 did me the world of good

I'm much better today, I was just feeling a bit panicky about my lack of a "backup" fund. When I have too much time on my hands I start thinking "what if...."........and that doesn't do anyone any good!

I'll be fine until the 22nd. I'd forgotten that my dad owed me £60 for doing his Christmas shopping so I'm sorted for the works "do" on Sat and I have plenty of food in the cupboard, and all the bills are paid for the month. There are people with really serious problems on this forum so I consider myself lucky

I also forgot that I'd subscribed to the Virtual Sealed Pot challenge, so I've transferred £6.80 today and will transfer again on Friday that way I will have caught up with myself by next week (hopefully!). I keep forgetting things! I'm telling myself its because I have so many things on my mind and things to remember, its only natural that something gets "bumped" out when I think of something new (thats my story anyway!):rotfl:

Ooh, yes, another thing.........I've started a £2 coin jar this morning. I'm not going to touch it until its full :A

Have a good afternoon x

3_kids_2_jobs_1_dog

Hi Snowdon.

I think you are doing really well. My Ex was a Bank Manager and a real control freak with money, think that is why I have gone too much the other way since I left him. My new Hubby is much more the 'head in the sand' type with me now having to do all the worrying!!! Ironic really!!! Ex was also useless at flatpack so I am quite adept with a power tool!!:rotfl::rotfl:

I'm sure you will easily make it through to the 22nd, especially now you have remembered the money Dad owes you.

I know what you mean about a contingency fund, I am desperately trying to build one for us as well as clear some debt as I am at very real risk of not having a job come April. **Battening down the hatches**

Good luck
321

Snowdonlily

Hello everyone, hi 321

Another day closer to the 22nd

No sign of this snow here yet, but it is raining quite a bit at the mo.

DS2 and DS3 coming home from uni today and tomorrow. No doubt they'll bring tons of dirty laundry home with them. Can you believe I'm missing dirty laundry!?

I'm having an attack of the "guilts" today. Whenever I think about Christmas, I can't get the image out of my head of my boys sitting down to a half cooked lunch prepared by their father.

I've been trying to think of a time when we had a really happy family lunch, and while they weren't ALL bad, the one that keeps popping into my head is the one when H went to the pub for his christmas pint and was so late coming home the lunch was ruined.

We had a full blown screaming match ending with the boys crying and shouting at their father to leave me alone. The boys and I ended up eating our lunch in the dining room and H ate off his knee in the lounge.

I would have left him that day if I hadn't been sipping wine while I was cooking .

The point is, I'm really missing them and its getting worse this week. I can't wait for this horrible year to finish so we can all wipe the slate clean and get stuck into a fresh start.

Right, I'd better snap out of this mood before I start shouting "bah humbug" over the counter at people. There's little enough customers around as it is

I think I need to focus on something positive, so lets start thinking about what I want out of 2011

1. I want to see more of my boys.
2. I want to be happy (if I can manage No1, No2 should be easy!).
3. I want to move back to my hometown (don't know how this will happen yet. Could be to a rental property to start with or if I can get a mortgage, it will be to my own home)(this will help with No1 and No2).
4. When I get my own home, I will fill it with furniture of my own choice and no one else's!
5. I want to lose weight and get fit (yes....again! )
6. I want to start liking the way I look again.
7. I want to be able to start saving money again
8. I want to live my life so I don't have any regrets.

Things I don't want in 2011.

1. I don't want to miss out on anything.
2. I don't want credit.
3. I don't want to keep giving myself a hard time.
4. I don't want to keep comparing myself to other people.
5. I don't want to worry about what other people think all the time.
6. I don't want to spend a fortune on clothes I'll never wear just to make myself feel better.

That feels much better :T

Hope everyone is keeping warm and safe x

Snowdonlily

I spoke to soon.............here comes the snow!!

maman

HI snowdonlily. I don't think it's at all unusual to feel like this after a break-up, even if it was of your choosing. People often compare it to a bereavement and things like Christmas, birthdays etc are always hardest the first time round.

I think your list of resolutions is admirable. The moving back to your home town one is excellent and I think you should try and find somehwere to rent ASAP (obviously without incurring financial penalties where you are now). That way you'll be there for the boys whenever they want to call even if it's just a short pop-in visit. I think the mortgage/buying your own property might take a bit longer and you might as well be happy while you wait for settlement:)

On the losing weight thing: I've managed to lose almost 1.5 stone in the last few months. I'm determined not to buy new clothes till I've got to the size I want to be BUT I'm enjoying wearing my existing clothes because they fit me better. I hadn't realised just how much I must have looked sort of poured into them in the past. Rambling way of saying if you acheive a bit of weightloss then you won't need lots of new clothes to feel good about yourself.

Hope snow not too bad down your way. We've only had a little bit of rain. Biggest worry is that it freezes and roads turn into a skating rink.

amber03

Good for you snowdenlily get everything off your chest. Think positive and the new year will bring a new you. If you manage to loose weight you should start to feel more positive about yourself which if your sons see a happier you they will feel better. Good luck on moving back to your hometown i hope you manage this, 12 monthes time i hope things will be alot better for you.

I rememeberthe first xmas my brother had with his kids after he had split with his wife, he asked his eldest son what he enjoyed best about xmas, he replied that this was the first xmas nothing got smashed which upset my brother but he then knew he had made the right decision because the kids where aware of what was happening.

Keep letting off steam on this board we are all behind you. Good luck

We have'nt had any snow yet hope it stays that way as i am finishing off my xmas shopping on saturday. x

Snowdonlily

Thanks amber, my heart tells me I've done the right thing. I honestly think I would be really ill by now if I'd stayed

Anyway, I don't know what to do this morning. Its been snowing all night and still snowing at the moment. Do I try to go to work? I could probably get there, but would I get back? I hate driving in the snow..............and I hate having to make the decision to drive or not to drive. :mad::mad::mad:

Snowdonlily

Well.......I got to work (just!) but then turned back around and came straight home as the road was closing behind me. I think I was a bit foolish to try in the first place. I'll know better next time

As soon as I got there I phoned Head Office to speak to my Line Manager, he hadn't made it to work. His assistant hadn't made it in and there was no one on reception. So, tomorrow, I'm not going to take any silly chances. If I get to the top of the hill and its as bad as it was this morning, I'm turning around and coming home :mad:

I hope everyone else is safe and warm x

Snowdonlily

Snowed in again today, there's about 10" of snow here!

Should be getting ready for the christmas party now, but we've had to cancel due to the snow. This means I have an extra £30 for my jar :beer:
I haven't decided yet how I'm going to record what I save and how I save it so for now its going into my £2 coin jar.

I've also joined the Virtual Sealed Pot challenge

Tonights tea was eggy bread...........delicious and didn't cost a penny :T

karom

Hello, know what you mean about feeling must absolutely go to work as boss will be there and finding out there is nobody. Have a lovely evening.