Right or Wrong

sammilou1968

My daughter doesn't get EMA but we can't afford to give her £30 a week either (and at the moment they are at college because they want to be but that's another issue!) or a Christmas bonus. So she does have a part time job. I buy essentials eg toiletries, school stuff etc she buys most of her own clothes and anything else she wants. I wouldn't charge her keep. When she had an authorised day off from college we had a letter to say she had had a notified abscence within about 3 days

Savvy_Sue

January20 wrote: »

She also got herself a part-time job, which is very commendable and mature.

I agree!

Of course, if the PWC is on any means tested benefits, then if she IS taking board off the child then that needs to be declared, doesn't it? And tax credits are means tested, if nothing else is.

onlyroz

I wouldn't take money off a child who was in full-time education, and I wouldn't expect them to get a part-time job either. The story would be different, however, if they were in full-time employment and still living at home.

Susan_Frost

Is the PWC jealous of her daughter (dont know what PWC stands for but presumably the mum).

She is getting enough money to keep her daughter through benefits and maintenance, so lack of money to feed and generally "keep" her should not be an issue.

The girl is doing well at college, enjoying herself, got herself a part time job. Mum is basically calling her a liar, 'cos she is checking her EMA is case she is lying - dad has intervened and college have agreed they have made mistakes and THEY have NOT paid it properly. No mention of daughter running wild, etc. etc. causing her any of what I would call real worries.

Why cannot mum just leave the girl alone. She sounds like a kid to be proud of, to be honest, and with a decent future ahead of her.

She has a caring dad around who tried to sort something out for her instead of not believing her. Is mum resentful of that ?

Some parents, sad to say, dont necessarily want their kids to have what they may not have achieved in life. Is something like that the real problem ???

And Tiamai_D I would never make saving a condition that she can still live at home. There are far worse things a kid could do, and then I would be reluctant. It is a part-time job for goodness sake.

*Louise*

pinkclouds wrote: »

I wouldn't take money off my kids and I'd believe them if they told me the sky was green. I don't understand why some people have children. Of course, that's just my personal opinion.

Really??

I wouldn't take money off mine either but I draw the line at being gullible enough to believe anything they say :rotfl:

joanne_d_3

My Daughter is 17 , just recently left school and is on a training course.

She receives a training allowance which is £40 per week and also managed to get herself a permenant part time job within weeks of leaving school :T in which she works 18 hours per week - earning almost £90 per week. This is a total of£130 per week.

As she is on the training course i continue to receive my tax credits and child benefit for her and so i personally do not take a penny "housekeeping" from her.

This is nothing to do with "spoiling" her or "wrapping her up in cotton wool" , this is merely to do with the fact that i am receiving help (in the form of tax credits and cb) for her so why should i be greedy and expect two people to pay me to look after her ?

She pays for phone top ups and any "extras" she wants to buy but for clothes and toilitries i still buy those.

My moto for her - which will be the same for all my Children is that society is tough today and i would rather they worked and managed to be sensible with their money ! If they can start saving now then their future is going to be a little bit easier for them.

For this reason i do monitor my Daughters spending and i do offer her advice on money . She will regularly come to me and say "Mum , i wanted to buy this but do you know is this an ok price for it or would i get it elsewhere cheaper?" I do however monitor her spending as oppossed to contolling it.

I have access to her online banking which i check occassionally with her permission and if i am totally honest i have to say that my Daughter is a very responsible girl who comes to me and asks for advice , advice which i am always happy to give. After all , how are they supposed to get "wordly wise" if we dont show them the way?

MrsBartolozzi

I wouldn't take board from my kids while still at school/college for A levels. But if she is getting £30 a week EMA and more money from her job that's quite a lot of spends. I'd give her a few weeks to spend all her money as she wishes to then suggest firmly that an amount, maybe 1/2 - 2/3 of her wage goes in a savings account for her future.

Accountant_Kerry

i wouldn't take board on the proviso that she saved 30% of her wages.

jw2003

I think if you're still getting CB for her and other benefits relating to her age then no, I wouldn't take board off her. However, these things will soon change and then I don't think it's unreasonable to ask any adult living in your home to contribute to the running costs

coops228

honeyD wrote: »

Sometimes its a good thing to make your kids pay their way. It lets them know what the real world is like where you pay your rent, council tax, gas, electric, water bill, tv licence etc etc etc. My parents had me pay them board and I am so grateful because now I know the value of money and dont waste all the time. I pay bills then anything left is mine to play with until I get paid next. My brother and sister didnt have the same however, they borrowed from our parents and never paid it back.. I always paid it back. They now dont know the value of money and my brother in particular wastes the whole lot of his on nonsense.
Some things are good for your kids, paying their way a little bit is worth it in the end for them. Once they leave hom, life isnt free and mammy and daddy cant always be there to bail you out when you get in a financial mess, they need to know that!

Gosh, I could have written that!! I was in a very similar situation even down to me learning the value of money and paying my own way if I wanted things growing up and paying board to the house for my upkeep and sibling didn't. Nowadays, I am the one in our household who is savy with cash (on here aren't I:D) whereas money burns a hole in siblings pocket. Useless with finances.

I think teaching kids early on the value of money can only be a good thing. If that means paying them for doing chores whilst growing up or asking for "housekeeping" when working or asking them to pay for luxuries such as fancy clothes/magazines etc then fine.
If they earn money and can spend it without any guidance then how will they cope in this financial climate we find ourselves in?

Guidance is what we should be giving and I guess every families situation differes so much from the next that it is difficult to say what the best course of action is.