My Dads Dead What Now?

chilli_dog

Sorry about your loss.

I lost my dad a few years ago, it was and still is a big loss.

Hope things get better for you

Martin

alba37

I would also like to send my condolences during this terribly sad time for you and your family.

Reading about your situation really got me stumpted (and saddened) I cannot think of any other benefit your mum can receive at her age, with no dependant children. (I am no expert though) You will get council tax benefit due to a low income & also free prescriptions etc. I am not sure what your local CAB is like, it can be difficult to get to see someone here, and if it were me I would make an appointment with a benefit officer or phone the benefit help line. 0800 882200 (hope that's the right number)

Just been looking at allowances for Income support, and although it isn't much your mum may be able to get that. That would help a lot for Council Tax benefit too.

Tino_2

Hi there,

Firstly, having lost my Dad in January I know what you're going through, so my deepest sympathies.

I'm presuming your username isn't just a coincidence and you live in Aberdeen. If so, what I would suggest you do is go back to Welfare Rights (I take it that's where you went in the first place) and ask if you can be referred to the 'Healthy Living Network(HLN)'. This is a local organisation and they will make sure you receive all the help and support that is entitled to you.

You unfortunately can't go directly to the HLN otherwise I would give you their phone number. If you have any trouble getting referred to them, let me know.

Good luck.

janash1959

I add my condolences to you and your family at this very difficult time.

I can only add what others before me have said, the local Citizens advice bureau will do what they call a full benefits check, take along details of any benefits your household already get, bills, bank statements etc. They will give you lots of help.

Don't forget, amid trying to sort everything out for your mother, that you need some 'me' time. Don't be rushed into anything, and if you find that you struggle to pay bills at this time, write straight away to the relevant company, explain what has happened, tell them it's in habd and you will be in touch as soon as possible. The only other thing I can say (having sorted my father in laws estate last year when he died) is keep everything in one place (in a file) that way, you won't be searching the house for bits of paper when you need them.

All the best.

Ruby_Pudding

janash1959 wrote:

I add my condolences to you and your family at this very difficult time.

I can only add what others before me have said, the local Citizens advice bureau will do what they call a full benefits check, take along details of any benefits your household already get, bills, bank statements etc. They will give you lots of help.

Don't forget, amid trying to sort everything out for your mother, that you need some 'me' time. Don't be rushed into anything, and if you find that you struggle to pay bills at this time, write straight away to the relevant company, explain what has happened, tell them it's in habd and you will be in touch as soon as possible. The only other thing I can say (having sorted my father in laws estate last year when he died) is keep everything in one place (in a file) that way, you won't be searching the house for bits of paper when you need them.

All the best.

That's really excellent advice Janash

So sorry to hear about your father Aberdeenlad

lemans-tom

First - condolences to you and your family. My dad died at age 60 in 1981 when I was 14. He had never been off work in his life until his final illness. He was riddled with cancer and was still working 2 months before he died. I know what you are going through. I can't really add anything to other poeple's sound practical advice re benefits and helpline etc but maybe offer you some philosophical advice.

Take one day at a time, difficult I know at this present time but try. Deal with today's problems today and deal with tomorrow's tomorrow. Don't let the overwhelming scale of the problem get on top of you. A big problem is just lots of small problems stuck together. Break down a big problem into lots of small ones and deal with each one. Keep doing this and you will soon find that you've dealt with a big problem. Remember you will get through this, I'm not saying its easy or life will ever be the same but you will get through it. Keep the memory of your dad and the happy times you've shared alive with your mum and use this to refresh you when times seem particularly hard.

As an aside I think the benefits system in this country stinks. My mum was 55and working part time. We received few if any benefits, I think she got widow's pension and child benefit and that was it. there were times when we went hungry. The benefits system in this country is not designed to support hard working people who show thrift and enterprise. Even when she was a pensioner my mum received the basic pension only. No other benefits. This was because she was in receipt of 'other income' that barred her from receiving any. BTW the other income was a superannuation scheme that she had been obliged by her employer to join and which paid out the vast sum of £5 month. That barred her from receiving nearly a hundred times that amount. She tried to give it away but the 'rules' wouldn't let her.

Good luck. There are an awful lot of people out here who send you their best wishes.

mhoc

LondonDiva wrote:

Just wanted to extend my condolences.


You could alos look into getting a ldoger in to the spare bedroom to tide you voer.

good luck.

Yes the goverment have a "rent a room" scheme which I think used to be allow you to have £40 a week untaxable, not sure wether the ammount is the same. So you might have a student. I am not sure wether you can also charge extra for meals and laundry? Well worth giving your tax office a ring to enquire

You have come to the right place for help and advice, ask anything and someone will have the answer for you.

You must be going through so much pain and misery now. My own mum died suddenly in her sleep nearly three years ago. I was just starting to get to grips with things and then my mother in law was diagnoised in January, died in April. So we have been left with trying to sort the bills, the house etc out. The house has been on the market for months, nobody has been to see it and we have dropped the price twice. I dont think we will actually be able to get on with the business of grieving until the house is sold and the financial matters sorted

Mary

mhoc

Deleted_User wrote:

My parents bought the house many years ago which sometimes they regreted since it cost alot and was all the money they had but i always said atleast ur not paying any rent now.

My mum has alot of bills and we know they will have to be paid eventually. We are getting away with just paying a small amount just now but have been told that they will be wanting all their money 1day. What worrys me is that when the time comes to move out i wont be able to help with bills as i would have to pay for my own place.

I dont know wether this would work but it might be worth writing out a letter detailing the circumstances, exactly how much income you have coming in a week and sending this out to everyone gas, electric, water, etc Ask them to give you say three months to try and get things sorted and maybe offer to pay a minimum ammount by direct debit each month.

I say DD because it saves you having to rememeber to pay biils, the last thing you need at the moment.

Mary

alandisney

Sorry to hear of your very sad loss. Your mum should be entitled to Pension Tax credits or Minimum Income Guarantee. This would take her weekly income to £104 per week. She should also be exempt from Council Tax assuming that "you do not live in the house with her". Hope this helps.

Savvy_Sue

alandisney wrote:

Sorry to hear of your very sad loss. Your mum should be entitled to Pension Tax credits or Minimum Income Guarantee. This would take her weekly income to £104 per week. She should also be exempt from Council Tax assuming that "you do not live in the house with her". Hope this helps.

yes, but I think the OP does live in the house with his mum. And if Mum is only 51, is she not too young for Pension Tax Credits / MIG?