Its tough, it will get better and guess what its freezing brrrrr!

kidcat

FTM- my advise is to keep the evil boyfriend close, very close!! Theres an old saying about keeping your friends close and your enemies closer, this more than applies to evil boyfriends - a friends daughter had an awful boyfriend and I advised them the same, they didnt listen and it was a very dark time for them all, now a few years on and they are moving on, but she said that if she had her time again she would listen to what I had said, she had passed it on to someone she worked with and they had found that within a few months awful guy had gone.

At the very least if you stay close you will be a witness to anything that goes on - and that will help if anything get really nasty.

jackieglasgow

Just wanted to share some good news. OH has managed to get a day's work today and tomorrow, and the job for next week which was cancelled has been put back on!!! Hurrah, my savings should be safe Keep your fingers the weather holds, or if it doesn't that it at least waits until he's safely in Yorkshire on Monday!

flowertotmum

Jackieglasgow..thats great news..i'm really pleased for you both...:)
Kidact and stiltwalker..thanks..i do try to be nice to him but he is sooo fluffing rude:mad:..i have patience with most folks but he just pushes my buttons and he knows it:wall:...90% of the time we kinda ignore each other and thats fine by me...the other 10% of the time he makes me grit my teeth...my daughter is lovely,i feel for her,she did tell me that if she hadn't got pregnant then there is no way she would be with him:silenced:...i told her that she didn't have to be with him for that reason...i also told her that there is always a room here for her and grand-daughter if they ever need it...his mum is a nightmare:eek:..she has sla**ed me off to all and sundry..thankfully a lot of people didn't listen to her..they both put my daughter down and if i'm there i let them have it..then DD begs me to stop...but i'm sorry i didn't bring my children into the world to be hurt and abused by anyone..especially not sloth's little brother..(goonies film)...god i need to breath...let it out...i will try to harder to be nice to him and his mother...think i need a wash just thinking about that.bad girl me...
I really hope she see's sense before they do anything rash...
thank you ladies..i'll take your advice and talk to hubby..he's about set to go around and put a stop to it totally...
take care
ftm

NualaBuala

Just want to say thank you to you all for your support and concern. After all my fighting talk yesterday I am feeling very down about things today ... partly because the post brought bad news, have been turned down for social welfare, don't think they recognise ME and fibro (although I hadn't a proper diagnosis when I applied). It was a relatively short time ago I was well and able to work and study - it seems like a lifetime ago now as some days I can barely move to get to the bathroom or get food. I'm pretty sure i have grounds for appeal but what I am lacking (ironically) is the strength and energy to fight it. I will have to though as I just cannot work right now and I am ashamed of that, I hate feeling so useless and dependent. Even the physio dept say I'm not well enough to do their exercise programme.

Oh well tomorrow is another day and hopefully then I will feel able to tackle one of the problems on my list

Jackie - am delighted for you and your OH. :j

FTM - hope things work out for the best with your daughter and her BF one way or another.

Warm hugs to everyone on this chilly evening

Thriftkitten

Lotus-eater wrote: »

If you watched the rest of the program, although the ladies making the pasties said the miners threw away the crust. The miner helping the boys get a real feel for it just laughed when that was said to him, no he said, they never threw away anything, ate the lot.

I didn't watch the program, but when I read tha post I felt I had to post, the crust is the best bit Mmmmmmm getting hungry now thinking of pasties.....

jaxx46

Nualabuala

I'm assuming social welfare is like our esa? I know how you feel hon, it took the dwp 15 months to decide that I was well enough to go to work, despite letters from two doctors , 1 consultant and a physio. At the time I thought I was going to have to sign on for jsa which I just couldn't do physically. In the end I decided I would go for appeal even tho it was stressful, got some advice from cab, went to tribunal in August & was only in there about 20 minutes & was awarded the 15 points I needed to claim. The judge actually said that we could do the whole thing & I would have a lot more points but as I had the required no after 3 pages she didn't see why I should have to go through anymore stress. I know it seems difficult to do but there's plenty of advice out there, & anytime you have a meltdown we will all be here for you. I just wish I'd been a more active member when it was my turn.

mardatha

Noolly - I know how you feel pet. Been there. Husband made me appeal and I got all I had wanted. Knocked me back a bit getting through it, worth it in the end though.

modern_millie_2

Just wanted to share the news that the thaw has definitely arrived - saw a postman wearing SHORTS today!
Sorry to hear so many struggling - hope tomorrow brings something better.

Rosanna79

Nuala
So sorry to hear of your difficulties on top of everything else that's going on in Ireland. My experience of appealing against unfair decisions with my clients is that the authorities generally rely on the claimant being too exhausted / run down etc etc to follow it through. It takes a hell of a lot of effort, often just the massive forms one has to fill in are deterrent enough against following anything up.

Obviously you must appeal. Is there anyone either professional or a friend who could actually help you with the donkey work involved....? It also helps if some one will do it in stages with you perhaps over a few days. I do hope you can get some help and that you find the energy to deal with it.

Thinking of you hun..((hugs))

Hippeechiq

jackieglasgow wrote: »

Just wanted to share some good news. OH has managed to get a day's work today and tomorrow, and the job for next week which was cancelled has been put back on!!! Hurrah, my savings should be safe Keep your fingers the weather holds, or if it doesn't that it at least waits until he's safely in Yorkshire on Monday!

That's fab news :j Am really pleased for you hun

NualaBuala wrote: »

Just want to say thank you to you all for your support and concern. After all my fighting talk yesterday I am feeling very down about things today ... partly because the post brought bad news, have been turned down for social welfare, don't think they recognise ME and fibro (although I hadn't a proper diagnosis when I applied). It was a relatively short time ago I was well and able to work and study - it seems like a lifetime ago now as some days I can barely move to get to the bathroom or get food. I'm pretty sure i have grounds for appeal but what I am lacking (ironically) is the strength and energy to fight it. I will have to though as I just cannot work right now and I am ashamed of that, I hate feeling so useless and dependent. Even the physio dept say I'm not well enough to do their exercise programme.

Oh well tomorrow is another day and hopefully then I will feel able to tackle one of the problems on my list

Aw hun :grouphug: I feel for you, but jaxx46 is right, you need to appeal. Might it be less stressful if a family member filled in the paperwork for you maybe?

I think the government plan is to not give ESA and DLA entitlement to any new applicants and those that are on it are going to be kicked off, and then they will sit back and see who appeals. I'll be facing your dilemma in January. It's at the very time that you feel your weakest, that you need to be your strongest, but if you're like me, you have days where you simply don't have it in you to fight another battle.

I'll be recruiting my OH and my CMHT worker to help when it happens to me (or rather my daughter) as well as getting letters from her GP, Psychiatrist and both her Psychologists.

Have you got a friend or parent that can give you a hand with an appeal? A fresh pair of eyes, fresh phrasing? Or better still CAB? to help you best word your appeal? Up to date letters from your GP and the physio dept you attend should boost your chances. Anything you can think of. Maybe even keep a pad close by you so that you can jot down any relevant information as and when it comes to you. Just arm yourself with as much information and backing as possible.

You sound like you have extremely strong grounds for an appeal.

You've had a blow, and it winds you. Give yourself a couple of days to get your head around it, eh? and never ever feel ashamed hun.

Hope you feel brighter in a few days x