romantic gestures - on a budget

minerva_windsong

I've told this story a few times, but the most romantic thing my OH has ever done for me was show up at the station to meet me at the train with a gingerbread latte the size of my head on New Year's Eve (after he'd promised me one when we'd had to go into central London to return the suit he'd hired for his brother's wedding but didn't have time).

The note thing sounds sweet and cheap, although I'm intrigued by what she means by it not being enough, as to me romance is the little gestures rather than the big flashy expensive stuff. From what you've said though you sound very romantic!

SailorSam

Red_Doe wrote: »

I`m lucky, my fiance is wonderfully romantic.
He will take our dog for a walk and return, handing me a picked flower, like a forget-me-not,

I wondered who'd been pinching the flowers from my garden of a night.

Tish_P

Some people are expensive-gestures people, and some are thought-that-counts people. Asking on this board is obviously going to bias your answers towards the latter!

Ask her what kind of romantic gestures she wants, as it means different things to different people. If it's being whisked away to Paris for a five-star minibreak then she's going to have to readjust her expectations, but if it's handwritten love letters you're in the clear.

Kate78

Romantic gestures - of whatever nature - must be freely given expecting nothing in return (although chances are that you will get nice things in return anyway!)

My ex once sent me a love letter (while we were still together, lol). Nice and romantic, it was lovely to receive.

The aggravation started about a week later. When was he going to get a letter? It got brought up all the time and made me wish he'd never written the damned thing. I would have written one left to my own devices, but once it became something that was expected and demanded of me, i lost all inclination to write it.

I guess what I'm saying is being considerate to your partner and thinking of things that you can do or say to please them is more importand than a big gesture. Even if you do play along, she'll never know if it's from the heart or whether it's just to keep her from moaning at you.

cattkitt

It sounds like you're doing fine. Has she had previous relationships, and if so, what were her complaints about them? Additionally, what kind of person is she, i.e. what does she value generally, expensive stuff, kind friends, grand gestures, does she have a tattoo or her ears pierced more than twice, etc. The more information you give about her, the better we can tailor suggestions

What kind of wedding is her ideal wedding? If she's a flashy wedding kind of girl, then the odds are that she'll appreciate being at the centre of attention, so sending her something large/noticeable to be delivered at work with your love, where other people will ooh and ahh, and give her attention, will stand a good chance of being appreciated. On the other hand, if she's more introverted, then that's not so appropriate.

lolly1981

you sound like youre fine on the romantic front, as people have said its about personal things not the big flashy stuff (but to be fair it is nice too )

on the build up to my wedding hubby was being very secretive talking to people behind my back etc he had arranged for my sister to be a bridesmaid and had hired a wedding car for us a 1957 chevy belair red it was awesome and an amazing surprise when it came to pick me up. that is the one and only 'big' gesture hes made it was logvely but its the little stuff hes done.

i lov robins, he saw a nice little robin tree decoration he got it for me, its on my desk now. he gets me flowers very occasionly but its lovely when i get them. he kisses me on the forehead when he leaves for work in the morning, he thinks im sleeping but instead i lay thginking how lovely he is lol. he txts me out of the blue (he doesnt txt normally) he makes me coffee, lets me lay in and buys me books

so it really is about knowing your gf and what sort of thing she likes, then doing something very personal for her.

sorry not much help i know lol

JimmyTheWig

According to my wife, I was romantic once.
Valentines day. 18 months ago, I think.
MIL babysat. I was taking my wife out to dinner. But we didn't have much money.
I bought a load of picnic snack things (pork pies, sausage rolls, etc), dug out our candles, found a car park by the river and had a candlelit picnic in the car.

JimmyTheWig

The other thing I did, years ago, was booked a surprise day off work without telling her. I put my shirt and tie on and left for work as normal but only went as far as Sainsbury's. Came back with flowers and chocolates and told her it was her pamper day.

Localweb

A man doing the ironing, how cool would that be ladies? :j

spugzbunny

Blimey - will you be my boyfriend? Just once a week I'd like my OH to give me a kiss. Sad little me!