The Memorygirl Matrix

Cheery_Daff

Oh, and MG, thanks ever so much for asking what you can do to help :j I have absolutely no idea! :rotfl: It's not really practical help I need, I'm writing, I have people around me to read my writing and comment etc. What I need is emotional and cheerleading support, and bouying up when I can't handle things I need to focus to get on with things, to remove distractions (while keeping enough of a social life and my sanity).

I'm actually going on holiday around 20th december (the day the 50 day challenge ends - fate??), so all done and dusted before then would be fabulous!

Your idea about the mind map for the meeting is great. I partly avoided going to see him because I don't want to talk about it, I'm afraid it's going to be like the oral exam all over again and well, I'm just scared! Daft really, he's a lovely bloke, and I got on with him perfectly well before this...

Anyway, looks like there's a good chance I'll be starting full time work straight after Christmas holidays - so it really would be nice to have it out of the way by then! I need to set some targets for what needs doing by when and STICK TO THEM! Not entirely sure how I can ask people for help though - will have a think

(and in the meantime, will turn off the internet and get on with some work!) :rotfl:

Firewalker

Cheery_Daff wrote: »

disease Mr Daffs' mum was diagnosed when she was 54 I think, and lived for another 20 years afterwards. He found it soo difficult to deal with, and eventually stopped seeing her altogether. He's also now not far off that age himself, which has caused lots of anxiety of its own

I saw my Mum three months before she died - and had to run a marathon and raise over £700 for the Altzeimers Society to start dreaming of her as she was - not as she became.

Tell Mr Duff that it is not heredetory (mostly) and that research shows that exercise reducing the risk of getting it by about 50%. I am talking proper excercise that gets one fit though - not soaking in a pool or a gentle walk.

Firewalker

starnac

OliveOyl wrote: »

in £1 coins on the Friday before a bank holiday I thought......

With accompanying camera crew please? :j

it would be a MASSIVE youtube hit and should definately be shown on one of those consumer revenge programmes. let me know what time it's going to be aired :rotfl:

Double_Trouble

Tuppence52 wrote: »

Hi All

DT is this me? I haven't had any emails

DH's head office is in Stowmarket, so collection could be arranged!:)

How long have we got?

No it wasn't you tuppence I thought it was a bit far for you from Norwich this is great I will email you the details

Thank you Universe.

DTxx

OliveOyl_2

Thanks Cheery,

it def. runs in families :eek: None of Ma's family lived beyond early 60's and she is now 80 though, so we don't know if any of her family had it. She totally denies anything is wrong, she says she is forgetful, but that everyone around her is plotting and keeping her in the dark. You'd laugh if it wasn't for her pain and confusion.

Aricept has been brilliant at slowing the progress, and there are regular breakthroughs apparently, so me and Mr Daffs should get checked out and treated early.

A book - Contented Dementia was a real help for me, and I gave a copy to my Dad, but at 90 he struggles to accept that he shouldn't correct her when she asserts something completely wrong. "I did tell you, you've forgotten" is the beginning of yet another row and yet more tears

I want my mum back, but that aint ever going to happen, and I hate that I'm not there to make their lives easier, give him a break or something.

Tuppence52

Double_Trouble wrote: »

No it wasn't you tuppence I thought it was a bit far for you from Norwich this is great I will email you the details

Thank you Universe.

DTxx

All arranged :j

Karmacat

Oh Olive, how dreadful. I'm betting, though, that if your mum could tell you, she'd want you to be out living your life, and not holding yourself back to look after her...

Memory_Girl

Stuff like this makes me certain that I am on the right track in ging back to work.


"You kindly sent me your book a few weeks ago. I got it about 4 weeks before sitting an exam that I had done zero studying for. Well I am delighted to say that after mind mapping the ten chapters in the book I passed!!! Yippee!!"


:T:T Woohooo to passing the exam Mrs - and your password is on it way.

And fantasia, Clottie et al - she's in Dunfermline so another one for [STRIKE]drinkie poos[/STRIKE] serious networking:rotfl::rotfl:

MG

thriftyscotslass

Oooooh this thread is pressing all my emotional buttons today

TMIF; OO - sending you hugs and lots of virtual support regarding your Mums.

I see lots of parallels in what you are going through and what I am going through with ds's Autism diagnosis. This wasn't supposed to happen; this is not how his life should be / how my life should be. I wasn't meant to have an adult son, classed as vulnerable and disabled living isolated at home with his parents.

I try so hard to eliminate this type of thinking and to eliminate that darned word "should" but tbh fail miserably time and again. I seem to be on a repetitive cycle through the different grief stages and can't seem to reach acceptance - I get so frustrated with myself - it is what it is - just get on with it arrgghhhh

GQ - I'm going to have a look at that EFT website. This jumped straight off the page at me "To tranquilise the anxiety". Ds's life is ruled by behaviours that are enacted to tranquilise anxiety. Our family life is based around "structure" and "low emotional arousal" in order to keep ds's anxiety and subsequent behaviours at manageable levels. I once phoned the mental health crisis centre in bits about ds's behaviours only to be told patronisingly that I was reacting normally to a set of extremely challenging behaviours - no sh*t Sherlock.

Ooops, this turned into a bit of an off-load, should get off butt and go and doooo something, Thriftyxxx

se999

So sorry to hear about what you and your family are going through. Olive Oyl.

It's such a cruel disease. I think one of the saddest films I've ever seen was the Judi Dench one about Iris Murdoch and the effect of her Alzheimers on her and her husband.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0280778/

Peter Suchet promoting the Admiral Nurses is helping raise the profile too, it's a disease hidden away in homes largely with families trying to cope.