The Giving Up/Cutting Down Alcohol Support Thread - Numero 9!

penelopedee_2

:j:jMonday to Thursday AF Challenge:j:j

DecemberBaby
Pen
Puzzcat

Roll up, roll up .... anyone dare to join .... it's only 4 nights

365days

Sim; I agree with Gien. There must be something that you gain from drinking. That you are scared of losing if you stop. This could be completely unconsious (sp?) I am overweight and have recently worked out why I sabotage my attempts to lose weight. In my case it is safety from intimacy and relationships which scare me silly! There said it out loud!!!

Mood lifted after a lovely afternoon at the beach, long walk on the sand, sun shining...positively balmy, and few goes on the 2p pushers! Went to a Hungry Horse for dinner and had the MOST disgusting meal. I know it's cheap and cheerful but there was nothing cheerful about mine!!

Ohhh X factor starting. Have a good evening all.

maman

I must be the most boring person ever (pleeeese don't all agree!:D) I don't do Xfactor or SCD or Apprentice but will be joining OH (currently watching Antiques Roadshow:o) in a moment to watch Downton Abbey. It's set at Highclere Castle which is only a short drive from us, keep planning to visit, must do soon.

Where(ish) are you 365? I just love walking by the sea whenever I can.

Oh sim, What can I say that's not been said? I'm sending you a big sympathetic hug. I'm always concerned when you don't post as I guess you're up to no good. Have you absolutely any idea what the triggers are? When might you have rehab? Please keep posting.

DecemberBaby_2

penelopedee wrote: »

:j:jMonday to Thursday AF Challenge:j:j

Pen
Puzzcat

Roll up, roll up .... anyone dare to join .... it's only 4 nights

Oh go on then! I'll give it my best shot!

DBx

DecemberBaby_2

Sim - just want to send you a hug mate. Can't say anything better than what's been said but carry on with your plans for rehab and getting yourself sorted and I hope it will all work out for you one day.

DB x

graemecarter

gien wrote: »

Sim, big, big, hugs for you. you seem to be stuck in a cycle of being sober for a few weeks, feeling great, positive, organising your life. then you wobble a bit, cancel a few appointments.....then bang, bender, massive self sabotage, blow a load of cash.....come out at the end full of remorse and self loathing.

that must be truly exhausting.

the question I would ask myself (have asked myself) is 'what is so frightening about the change I am going through that makes self sabotage and three days drinking seem like a good way of avoiding it?'

I am really glad to see you back here, keep posting.

Myself , well, I have to 'fess up. this weekend I have had four social functions (this is not at all usual, honestly). on Friday night I drank nothing at all, twice, last night I had a glass of champagne (it was a birthday party), tonight I have had a glass of red wine (aperitif with friends). interestingly, this afternoon I noticed that my guests ( I was host) drank very little, but got ever so slightly drunk - clearly not used to it, last night and Friday everyone was drinking like fishes, it got a little silly.

So I have failed the 100 day challenge.

I have drunk like a 'normal' person drinks, one drink to be sociable, and then stopped. I can feel though that there is a lure to drink more, not so strong that I would go ahead, but just a little finger beckoning. i am being very vigilant.
to be honest, I have such bad hangovers and have so enjoyed waking up feeling fine, that I am very wary of drinking more.



But, I'm still up for a 98 day challenge! so I shall be abck on the wagon tomorrow.

Off to watch a recorded version of SCD now.

Good post.
What is the answer if you ask yourself the question about the 100 day challenge?

365days

Maman-I'm pretty land locked actually in West Wilts so I either go up to Burnham or down to Sandbanks. Today Burnham won the day.

StressedOutSue

Hi all

I'll do the challenge too, please Penelope, thanks!

Well done, Budgie, I bet you feel proud of yourself. And congratulations to DS to having the offer accepted - how exciting!!!!

Night night all

xx

graemecarter

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

Hi Ladies and Gents,

Hope you're all ok.

After nearly 3 weeks sober, I ended up drinking for 3 days solid last Wed, Thurs and Friday.

Got through £400 +

Am at the end of my tether.

Life has been lonely, pointless and empty for the last 10+ years.

Can not see a way out

Sim xx

I felt at the end of my tether at the end of my drinking. It's a horrible place to be.

Nothing changed until I made some big changes to my actions. Just hoping things would get better didn't work for me.
As we can see from some of the posters on this thread (like me), just wanting sobriety is useless unless some actions go into it.
My alcoholism was meant that I would expect/hope to drink normally/moderately the next time I drank, even though the last 15 years had proved that was never going to be the case...no wonder it's a disease of insanity!

Good luck Sim. Remember you're an ill person, not a bad person.

SimIsOnTheUp

Thanks all.

Thanks Graeme.

I'm at a point where it feels the toughest yet, to pull myself out of this.

Almost as if I don't even feel 'worthy' of being better.

Silly I know.

I was drinking to stop thinking / to switch off / to relax / to stop feeling self - conscious / to stop feeling lonely / to 'hide' in a pub / to have the balls to talk to Women etc. Drinking to irrationally seek solace in oblivion.

I can not handle the fallout again though.

Having just done some quick sums, I worked out that on Wednesday I had £1,050.

I spent £65 on a second hand iPod Nano, £35 on headphones (another way to avoid interaction with people..), £15.00 on a mains adaptor for it.

(Drunk shopping is another bonkers pastime of mine, when I've been on the sauce).

£10 on Russell Brands new one (oh the irony)..probably a total of £70 in train tickets to two cities nearby, a total of £120 in hotel stays for two nights.

That leaves £735.

I have about £40 in my flat, and a further £370 left in my account = £410.

So obviously, that's £735 - 410 = £325 on booze.

F'in unbelievable.

Sim x