Life after bankruptcy?

beanielou

Can only echo lisawaters.

ani_26

Alot has happened and many people have been involved. I don't want to go into too much detail. I keep coming back to this stupid diary, and i know i shouldn't, and i should be careful. It doesn't pay to be too open about what you say.


Maybe today is the start of all things new. I have people helping me now, but what does it take to receive that help? Its surprising how ani's demise this week changed everything. No car, virtually wipes out my workload. With so many people telling me to go on the sick, it really does appear i will be better off to go on the sick. I'm going to give up work.For how long, i've no idea, Until i've find i'm a human being again, or the person i used to be? The power that be's won't like it, but i need a break from them, too. I may never get my job back.



So long as you continue to work, even one day a week, it appears you will never receive any financial assistance, and the fact of the matter is, i don't think i will be a great deal worse off, by not working. I have good grounds for going on the sick. The world is my oyster, huh?


Its been one long struggle from the point before bankruptcy and repo, to the end goal of social housing. Now i'm here, i still can't afford to be here, so i've got to call time out Let the social pay my rent and give my mind and body time to recover from all this. A colleague tonight was advising me to join a twirlies walking club, ( whats one of those ?), anad do all those things you can do for free, on the social. Go swimming, didn't they used to give gym membership for free? take some classes, ( i've always wanted to take a computer course ), generally get out and about and start meeting people, socialising. So long as its free. I had the thought tonight, i can get free prescriptions, i can get an appointment at the dentist, get some spectacles so i can see again, and read, too.


The person who aappears to be dedicated to helping me, has promised i won't be evicted, despite the council's hard handedness. It seem they wanted two months rent, one in arrears and one in advance. I was just told you pay it on a weekly basis. I don't know when the rule changed, but that's what they have been demanding. Two months rent. I suppose i'll still have to pay the arrears. I don't know. Let someone else sort it. They said i need to get my fight back. Its true. I've been fighting for so long, i've given up. I've no more to give.


The font has changed and i can't even be bothered

Aesop

Good to hear you are getting some help ani.

Take the help and the rest, and recover yourself. Be happy.

MatyMoo

Soooooo pleased to hear you have found someone to help at last.

Please take any/all help offered.

You have sounded so tired, worn down, desperate for so long I think stepping off the hamster wheel is a great thing to do.

I really hope that you can relax and take advantage of some of those free things.

Hugs

Maty
-x-

ani_26

I still won't allow myself to believe i'm going to stay here. To think i was estatic when i was offered this place, i hate it now. The walls are closing in on me. Its like a noose around my neck. There's stuff everywhere because i still don't believe i can unpack. I looked out the windows at the gardens. I've barely looked at them since i moved in. I keep vagueley thinking, oh, i've got a gardens, but i have'nt even been in them yet. I hate gardening, but they are still good to look at, if i ever make the effort.


Same as the bare lightbulbs in every room. Gives it a strange feel. Not that i'll ever be able to afford s* whats the name
lampshades. Maybe i shouldn't write, after all. I'm tired. So tired


They are going to speak to ccs, i think, so i can pay my loans back at a £1 a week. I've gone a long way round, to end up like this again, but they are going to help me too, to pursue my court claim, the reason why i took the loans in the first place. With knobs on. Or interest, with a bit of luck. See, i'm owed alot money, ( well, its alot of money to me ), from various places, including the taxman. Its all a question of time, unfortunately. They looked at my paperwork and said some people fit into the twilight zone and you're one of them. Yes. Thats what i've been saying all along. Its not straightforward, and now, with the taxman cuurently taking most of what i earn, i'm due a rebate. With knobs on. Not much chance of getting interest there, i don't expect. But one thing is for sure, i'm going to get my pay, whatever it takes.



Still got alot to sort out, and definitely no unpacking, this weekend.


I could do with a day when i just do nothing at all. I keep thinking, all i have to do is draw back the bedroom curtains and lie in bed and look at the hills.

ani_26

Thanks, both xx

Its just a shame how far things have to go before you get help

Aesop

ani_26 wrote: »

I could do with a day when i just do nothing at all. I keep thinking, all i have to do is draw back the bedroom curtains and lie in bed and look at the hills.

sounds good.

and remember there is always freecycle

ani_26

As a note, none of this would have happened. Its all ani's fault


Would i ever sell ani?


Not a chance. Its too soon to think about what i'm going to do about ani. The guy who owns the garage is a classic car enthusiast and will do anytihng to help keep them on the road. I'm sick of people who have no interest in cars, telling me to get rid. He is now saying £600 for parts and labout etc, but its still way out of my reach. He offered me a payplan, as i've being going there for nearly 20 years, but its still out of my reach.

Time enough to see what happens, i guess, but for now, no deal , no sell. No one understands my passion for that car.


Its a bit like a horse

So_Sad_Angel

ani_26 wrote: »

I could do with a day when i just do nothing at all. I keep thinking, all i have to do is draw back the bedroom curtains and lie in bed and look at the hills.

This makes perfect sense & I think it what you need more than anything....you need to stop beating yourself up, accept where you are, embrace it & above all learn to connect with the basics again & let other people help you for a while.

I have been where you are...burnt out with pressure of even just trying to keep fighting (or thats how it felt to me). Enjoy the view of the hills...& when you feel well enough start with a gentle stroll & allow yourself to just relax in your surroundings.

I am so glad that you have found some help...& maybe ani has been your saviour in some way...she got you `home` & now is telling you to rest. If you still have her then get the `sorn` done & when you can afford it you can look forward to driving her again.

Have a restful weekend & take care.

x

So_Sad_Angel

I would also add that if you don`t have a garage then see if the council have some locally to let ..a friend of mine pays £6 a month & its worth every penny.