Will my violent ex be able to track me down?

whatup

Hello and thank you for choosing to read my post,

I left my abusive and violent ex partner taking our twin 2yr old sons with me. My absolute fear is that my ex will be able to track us down and take our lives - he's already tried. Police won't give witness protection as it'll cost too much money, sadly our lives are not valuable enough to them.

The only clear instruction/advice I have been given is to move away, change my name and disappear with my sons - sound advice! I moved away, haven't changed my name yet, can he track my new address because of this? How do I change my name safely? How do I disappear with two 2yr olds?

What are the ways in which he can track me and what can I do to ensure this does not happen?

Everything associated with living a life has to change, is there a template letter that I can send to DWP, Inland Revenue, banks, creditors, insurance companies, utility companies, etc, etc explaining my situation and my need for strict identity protection?

I'm desperate to protect our lives and identities. I can't be the only person in the entire UK that has this particular problem so if you can help in any way I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you

[Deleted User]

I didn't want to read and run, but unfortunately i don't have anything helpful to suggest apart from maybe looking at the women's refuge sticky thread and asking there for advice.

I hope someone will be along soon with some more constructive advice, well done for taking the brave steps and leaving, i hope your all a lot happier and your sons settled.

grey_lady

I think there's a phone number on the womens refuge thread at the top, I'm sure they'd be able to help.

graemecarter

whatup wrote: »

Hello and thank you for choosing to read my post,

I left my abusive and violent ex partner taking our twin 2yr old sons with me. My absolute fear is that my ex will be able to track us down and take our lives - he's already tried. Police won't give witness protection as it'll cost too much money, sadly our lives are not valuable enough to them.

The only clear instruction/advice I have been given is to move away, change my name and disappear with my sons - sound advice! I moved away, haven't changed my name yet, can he track my new address because of this? How do I change my name safely? How do I disappear with two 2yr olds?

What are the ways in which he can track me and what can I do to ensure this does not happen?

Everything associated with living a life has to change, is there a template letter that I can send to DWP, Inland Revenue, banks, creditors, insurance companies, utility companies, etc, etc explaining my situation and my need for strict identity protection?

I'm desperate to protect our lives and identities. I can't be the only person in the entire UK that has this particular problem so if you can help in any way I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you

Why is he not in jail serving time for attempted murder?
I think your best bet is for the police to take this more seriously, otherwise you'll have the stress of living in fear all your life. Please get them to reconsider their decisions and don't give up.

meritaten

graemecarter wrote: »

Why is he not in jail serving time for attempted murder?
I think your best bet is for the police to take this more seriously, otherwise you'll have the stress of living in fear all your life. Please get them to reconsider their decisions and don't give up.

you really think the police will help? they wont as this lady has found to her cost. they will investigate her and the kids murder - but wont do anything to prevent it.
I suggest the lady google erin pizzey.
I also think that the lady should change her name ASAP.

Sodapop

Talk to women's aid - I can't link as I'm a new user but they have loads of info on this so do look for their site. I rang them on behalf of a friend once and they were really helpful. There are now various things in place that there didn't used to be e.g. I noticed on the electoral roll form we just got, it says you can apply for 'anonymous registration' which you didn't used to be able to do (I worked for a local council and we used to give very off-the-record advice to people in this situation as officially they were meant to register).

I think women's aid might also be able to advise on whether the police are doing their job properly. Good luck.

whatup

graemecarter wrote: »

Why is he not in jail serving time for attempted murder?
I think your best bet is for the police to take this more seriously, otherwise you'll have the stress of living in fear all your life. Please get them to reconsider their decisions and don't give up.

I completely agree!!! Problem is that jail won't be for rest of our lives.
I have to be careful what I say about criminal justice system so I won't say anything other than it's in hand.

Thanks for your comments

Savvy_Spender_South

whatup wrote: »

The only clear instruction/advice I have been given is to move away, change my name and disappear with my sons - sound advice! I moved away, haven't changed my name yet, can he track my new address because of this? How do I change my name safely? How do I disappear with two 2yr olds?

What are the ways in which he can track me and what can I do to ensure this does not happen?


Thank you

Some practice advice hopefully:

Name changes via Deedpoll, google it, about £21 per person, do all three of you.

Even after, ex directory to stay of 192.com

Avoid social networking sites such as Facebook, Beebo etc, because anyone looking can triangulate a three person friendship group to find you.

Hardest question is what to do with the twins. They will need some thought about the dad question as they get older.

Evansangel

Is it required to change your whole name? As that might confuse the twins.

I cant offer any real advice but i didn't want to read and run. ((hugs))

whatup

meritaten wrote: »

you really think the police will help? they wont as this lady has found to her cost. they will investigate her and the kids murder - but wont do anything to prevent it.
I suggest the lady google erin pizzey.
I also think that the lady should change her name ASAP.

This is absolutely true!! cjs is to protect the criminal not the victim, I want justice when we're alive not when we're dead.

Will take your suggestions on board.

Thanks

whatup

Sodapop wrote: »

Talk to women's aid - I can't link as I'm a new user but they have loads of info on this so do look for their site. I rang them on behalf of a friend once and they were really helpful. There are now various things in place that there didn't used to be e.g. I noticed on the electoral roll form we just got, it says you can apply for 'anonymous registration' which you didn't used to be able to do (I worked for a local council and we used to give very off-the-record advice to people in this situation as officially they were meant to register).

I think women's aid might also be able to advise on whether the police are doing their job properly. Good luck.

Thanks for your advice. I have spoken to Women's Aid Refuge but will call again. Thanks for the tip on anonymous voters register.