Son's 18th-how much money is normal, please ?

Lilyloo_2

Just a quickie-what would you say is a realistic amount to give? Our son is 18 soon and we have planned to give him around £100. Is this very mean? I realise that a realistic amount is 'whatever you can honestly afford'-but I'd be interested to know what others give. The thing is, at the moment we could give him some more without going into debt, although my job is not secure, likely to end this year, so we are looking to the future, too. I'm also worried that although he is a sensible, caring boy, as he has grown up he has started to expect more and won't really appreciate the money. I know he's disappointed as he was hoping for a very large sum on his birthday, in line with what his friends have said that their parents will be coughing up. Advice welcomed please.

rachbc

i got a sewing machine for my 18th - I had it til last christmas when my hubby got me a new one (17 years later) personally i would rather give a lasting gift than any sum of money. My daughter will either get something practical like I did or jewellery

Lilyloo_2

Thank you, I guess that I didn't make myself very clear-I should have asked, 'how much would posters give as a cash gift OR spend on a lasting gift?'

shellsuit

I'd like to give something like a watch when my eldest hits 18 as it's something he can keep.

If I was giving him cash, I suppose we'd give him at least £200, but with a couple of little presents too, like aftershave etc..


Oh and No, £100 is not mean at all ~ just give him whatever you can afford!

jamespir

id would have been chuffed if my parents gave me 100 pounds for any birthday

PasturesNew

I got £10, just calculated how much that is today and it's £40-50, depending how you calculate it (RPI, earnings, etc).

£100's a lot. There'll always be people who give/get more... even if you were giving him £5k somebody in his peer group will be getting a new car... and I bet they feel hard done by as it doesn't have personal plates.....

suelizab

I was given a £3 clock for my 18th, 2 years later my brother was given a huge 18th birthday party with caterers and at the same time I was given £5 towards a £7 nurses Fob watch for my 21st . Its not the money but the thought that counts - or lack of it .

Lilyloo_2

Thanks for your posts-I think part of the trouble is that me and my hband are a bit old fashioned-we both left home and went out to work at 16, and nothing came easy, so I find it hard to just lavish great sums on the kids, even if we could afford it. I'm sure that my son's parents think that we are just tight.We've always bought them everything they've needed,eg: bikes,
clothes that help them 'blend in' but just not rashly expensive. I'm sure that we will be paying out a lot when the kids go to Uni too.

Lilyloo_2

Lol, pasturesnew-you are so right about the number plates! It's so true.
suelizab-my experience at 18 was very similar to yours-I really wanted a particular piece of jewellery-I'd chosen it partly for it's price as it was the very best inexpensive one I could find, but family still bought me a £2 cheaper, rather unpleasant one that made my neck green! They didn't do it to be nasty, but just because it was cheaper.

invisiblecabbage

When ds1 was 18 we bought him a Tall ships experience day (about £100). He is at an age when he would still lose a watch and jewellery not his thing! so an experience day he can 'keep' for the rest of his life.

I have repeated this same experience with the nieces and nephews when they reached 18.

Busy saving for DS1 21st when we would like to send him to Everest basecamp (he is really into his outdoors)

HTH

Red_Cat

Give whatever you think is appropriate and can afford. £100 is a good sum and if I had an son who's 18 birthday was this year I would probably give him that amount with some other gift (sub £50).