The giving up/cutting down alcohol support thread Part 8!

Lurkio

fayjmck wrote: »

I find it hard, which sounds a bit ironic, but my kids still have their dad's name, and for them - I'm happy - but it makes for a muddled household and I do feel sad that we don't share the same name so for school things etc I'm often known by my former married name.

However, with OH and I getting married - he's going to grab a bit of my name - we've nearly all (me kids and OH) gone for a melting pot of all three names chopped together - but I know their dad would be upset - so whilst my kids don't have my name, when we get married OH will have half my name half his - and the kids will just stay the same - we've talked about it and they say as long as I don't mind, they'd rather stay as they are.

they understood all that ^^^^^^ ???

Bright kids.... :rotfl:

Af'noon, Doc :wave:




eta : Hi paolo :wave:

Lurkio

fayjmck wrote: »

(()) miss P - you try the hardest of any step parent I know!

I would agree with that....... :cool:

SimIsOnTheUp

Alcohol worker came and went by 12.30.

Went very well. She's lovely

We started on the forms for applying for rehab funding.

Told her I'm in two minds about it, and apparently her boss is anti - rehab, and pro - 'keeping it in the community'.. so I might not even get the funding anyway.

Discussed my dysfunctional relationship, and my dysfunctional attitude to Women generally!

Chatted about codependency, and about the importance of sorting out my finances one and for all.

..about the possibility of taking antabuse.

I also told her about my back to work appointment yesterday and how loveably bonkers my 'advisor' is.

I'd suggested to her (the back to work advisor yesterday) that I was in two minds - 50 / 50 about rehab / about how I'd probably prefer going back into work.

The girl grimaced, and said "Hmm I don't know about the jobs. Why try and run, when you can't even walk?"

I was gobsmacked! We might as well all just give up now eh? I think not

After asking this girl yesterday what she'd meant, and telling her that I thought I was doing quite well going 4 weeks without a drink, she said "Well you've gone 4 weeks before haven't you? I'm a positive person Sim, and I know you can do it. I just don't want to see you go for all these job, get a job, end up under too much pressure.. have a slip, and end up drinking again..beating yourself up and being back in that cycle..baby steps and all that"

Hmm. She still annoyed me though!

She does come out with some strange things, considering she's meant to be encouraging people back into work..

My alcohol misuse worker was with me on this too.

Anyway, session today went well, and she's going to print some info off on 3 different rehab places which I'd had a look at before. We'll then finish the forms when I see her next in two weeks.

I also start CBT in 10 days too, which I'm looking forward to

Need to get cracking and apply for one of these jobs now for starters.

At least my flat is looking immaculate now!

Big hugs to anyone on here who needs them.

Sim xx

Miss_Piggy_2

fayjmck wrote: »

I've been thinking about this one alot - its hard, but I think that hit it on the head.

I find it hard, which sounds a bit ironic, but my kids still have their dad's name, and for them - I'm happy - but it makes for a muddled household and I do feel sad that we don't share the same name so for school things etc I'm often known by my former married name.

However, with OH and I getting married - he's going to grab a bit of my name - we've nearly all (me kids and OH) gone for a melting pot of all three names chopped together - but I know their dad would be upset - so whilst my kids don't have my name, when we get married OH will have half my name half his - and the kids will just stay the same - we've talked about it and they say as long as I don't mind, they'd rather stay as they are.

How can I mind, like Lurks said, they're kids - as much as they push the boundaries etc - they are only kids.

(()) miss P - you try the hardest of any step parent I know!

Lurkio wrote: »

I would agree with that....... :cool:

Bless you both.

Fay - I can probably understand kids wanting to keep their dads name. My brothers were the same when my Mum married my Dad. Although, wierdly, my brother says it might have been easier for him to change it. Guess , like you say, makes school stuff etc easier.

Miss P
xx

Trasijocha

You inspire me to keep going with th AF ness. I am this time 23 days AF and I want to give up totally but still have days and moments when I have overwhelming urges to have a drink. Do these ever go away completey ? I know I dont get these urges for cigarettes now (although it has been about 6 years). I keep thinking how will I cope with holidays and parties and Christmas etc. I gave up for 6 months last year but got to the point where I was feeling deprived so started drinking again thinking maybe I would just cut down instead but it didnt take long to slip into old habits again and was drinking every day again (and put back on the stone I had lost) and got to the point where I wanted to give up. But what about these urges especially when I`m around people who are drinking and 'enjoying themselves' .....Trasi

shaggydoo

Evening All :hello:

Hope you're all ok!? I wasn't AF last night but plan to be tonight and the rest of the weekend. I have discovered another reason to be AF - I've no money saved up for Christmas!!!!

Just off to catch up and update the chart.



Shaggy

shaggydoo

September:-

:staradmin = 1 day AF
= 7 days AF

:j = target achieved

Budgie TF

Cazza TF

DB 15

Diable 3/30

Fay 2/TF

Gien 1/TF

Happyshopper 1/20

HB TF

Jo 1/TF

Lurkio TF

Maman 2/10

Marru 2/30

Miss P 2/30

Mookiepook 1/29

NRA 28

Randomname 1/15

SOS 24

Shaggy 1/17

Shoppy 1/25

SSG 1/25

Yellow Monkey 2/TF



PLEASE PUT AFDs IN BOLD RED FONT

shaggydoo

cazzasmazza wrote: »

I've got a part-time job, YIPPPEEEEEE!

I am so chuffed, so so so unbelievably chuffed! :j

Great News

shaggydoo

Sea78 wrote: »

hi all!! :hello:

Long time no see I know BUT I am still sober -14 months now!!!! Just fantastic, although my finances and waistline aren't lol.

Much love to all

Sea xxxx

Fantastic!

Marru

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

Would like to get back into Volunteering at the homeless drop in near me again, but I just don't feel strong enough yet.

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

I couldn't look after just myself when I was off on my benders!

SimIsOnTheUp wrote: »

I'd suggested to her (the back to work advisor yesterday) that I was in two minds - 50 / 50 about rehab / about how I'd probably prefer going back into work.

The girl grimaced, and said "Hmm I don't know about the jobs. Why try and run, when you can't even walk?"

Sim - ok I don't drink anymore but I do get still periods of depression. After passing my two exams in June I now wanted to do three in December. My boss told me to take a week to think about it if I would be better off just doing two again because I am not 100% well. I am so p1ssed off because she is right. So I have now signed up only to do two. I am still not happy about it but perhaps after I have passed the two flying colours while still have had the energy to get other sides of my life sorted I just might be ok about it. Not the same situation as yours but thought it might help you.

Paolo - that is absolutely horrid!!! :eek: Well done for ploughing through it all :T And also well done for all the positive decisions you have been making.

Names - those who know my surname can understand why I didn't want DD to have it hence she has her dad's name. Mine is bit of a mouthfull. I was going to change mine when married but that never happened . DD is free to change her name when she is older.

Shaggy - day 3 for me please