The (not so old) Crocks Cafe -Part 2

daska

formaldehyde_perfume wrote: »

Thanks. The appointment went really well, he phoned them up and they started saying the same stuff as they did to me but then he told them the legal position and they started backtracking and basically they now know that he is on my side and I should be taken seriously. He also thought I should be put in band A which is really pleasing, the only down side is that I will have to wait 6 to 8 weeks before I can start looking at properties.

Also, a shop in town wants to sell my jewellery .. It will be such a low turn over that it won't affect my benefits and it gives me a bit of a purpose. Fab!

Doesn't this deserve a thread of it's own?! I hadn't really thought about it before but when I went looking there's loads of stuff about how old people are being discriminated against by sheltered housing being closed down and how they don't want to live next door to noisy young people - the noisiest place I've ever lived was next to an old biddy who refused to have a hearing aid LOL

Hope you find a place soon

sunnyone

daska wrote: »

Doesn't this deserve a thread of it's own?! I hadn't really thought about it before but when I went looking there's loads of stuff about how old people are being discriminated against by sheltered housing being closed down and how they don't want to live next door to noisy young people - the noisiest place I've ever lived was next to an old biddy who refused to have a hearing aid LOL

Hope you find a place soon

I refused to live in a OAP bungalow after my accident because it wouldnt have been fair on my daughter and her friends, never mind the oldies who were really nice, the council wanted me to move rather than do minimal alterations to my then home but my home was perfect in nearly every way up until I needed a wheelchair in the home but we had bought this place/sold the other before that.

I have been looking at whats available in social housing and it is rarely suitable for families, in years to come we might need the capital from this house to live on which is why I was having a look and the good news is we would get plenty of points because we bought this while my husband was fit and well but not hes very unwell and hes had a stroke which means this house is hard to manage but the bad news is wheelchair accessable three bedroomed bungalows are like hens teeth.

I agree with daska, this topic deserves a thread of its own because nearly all disabled people live in unsuitable housing and with the LHA changes coming it will make life even harder for disabled people to gain suitable housing.

Trialia

Oh, yes, definitely deserves a thread of its own. The only reason it took me two years on the housing association/council combined waiting list to find somewhere to live was because most of the places suitable for my physical needs were for over-55s only!

formaldehyde_perfume

I can understand if people have families or if the under 55 person likes parties and lots of people round but each case should be taken on its own merit and I think I would much prefer it because I like a quiet life, I'm in no way comparable to a 'youngster' who is normal, even when I was pretty fit and healthy.

In the last 3 bi weekly advertisements of available housing there have been at least one or two over 55's properties in each issue that would be suitable for me, yet none other than that.

I'm just getting ready to go to the housing association office as they requested on the phone that I provide proof so I need them to photocopy my originals of DLA, ESA etc - I don't know why they want it but it's no skin off my nose if it puts me in a higher band.

Also, ESA (support group) and DLA (high mobility mid care) are the only benefits I get. Other than council tax and housing benefit, can I get anything else when I move out? I think I read that there's an additional premium on either my DLA or ESA if I am eligible for carers allowance which nobody claims for me (which they don't) but I forget where I found it or what it is. Help?


UPDATE: - So, I took my application form in to the housing office and to cut a long story short they again told me that I wouldn't be considered for a property with an over 55 or over 60 age on it. I got incredibly upset and cried down the phone to a friend and then phoned my discrimination advisor and he was brilliant, he said he would handle everything. He said it may come down to challenging their policy using points of the law, but it is discrimination.

SingleSue

Going through an interesting time at the moment....youngest not coping too well at school, not sure if it is due to the new way he is entering the school, a reaction to his specialist outreach teacher leaving at the end of the month, hormones or what. It was his birthday on Friday and it had to be much more low key than it generally is (and it is pretty low key to start with as he hates the attention on him) after a major meltdown in school culminating in him throwing and then stamping on his inhalers (cue much panic from the school at an inhaler less severe asthmatic youngest). It took several staff over an hour to calm him down enough for him to respond by something other than screams and shouts.

And now middle son is going weird....he has always been a stickler for things due to his aspergers but now it is going really silly. Got all the boys new toothbrushes last week, middle son is refusing to use his and demanding I get another one...because the handle has a tiny bit of purple on it.

He won't sit on a seat someone else has sat on in the last day because of germs, he won't eat with a fork someone else has eaten with before (even though it has been throroughly washed), he has become very rigid in the order he will put clothes on (always been rigid here but it has got 10 times worse recently), will only wear pants that have a certain bit on them (very hard to find), socks of a certain colour and texture (impossible to find - the ones we have were flight socks ex husband got from work many years ago and are unavailable now), have battles getting him into the bath because someone else has used it and umpteem other little but very annoying things.

I think I know what is causing it with him, he is year 9 and there are lots of changes and pressures going on and I think it is his way of being able to control what is going on in his life...just blooming annoying to the rest of us!

For me - I am getting new crutches tomorrow, going from a single crutch to two crutches for when things are really bad, although not sure how my left shoulder is going to cope with that.

I have also been thinking just recently of plucking up the courage to apply for a blue badge after several recent aborted trips to places as once there, I couldn't then do anything and visiting the town centre is now a no no as the non disabled parking is too far away for me to manage to walk to town, around and back to the car (I can just about manage there but that is it, I then can't walk around or back to the car) and my old trick of sitting in the car outside the shop while the boys go into the shop is now not possible due to disabled only drive through and park in the main road through the town centre.

Then again, I might feel differently tomorrow and decide I don't need it after all....or I will just avoid the town centre.

formaldehyde_perfume

Oh Sue, I feel for you so much.

I think you should apply for a blue badge, it would help you a lot. I know you are reluctant and see it as giving in but it makes life a lot easier.

My personal view is that all 4 of you should be receiving DLA of some level, but I know that even doing the forms once is a huge battle and you probably don't have the mental strength to go through it as well as everything else in your life. I hope things calm down for you soon though.

Also, have you looked in to EOTAS? I don't know if it's available in your area and it would be yet another fight, but it could make such a difference to either or both of your youngest sons.

SingleSue

Thanks....what is EOTAS? That probably tells you I have never heard of it hehe.

Doing the forms is not such a huge deal, did so many of them when the boys were younger that I got used to it but for me and eldest, it is the admitting that our bodies are failing us...something we haven't quite got our heads round.

Anyway, felt a right idiot today...took my dad to visit our old office and just as I was sitting down, the chair rolled away from under me, dumping me on the floor. Have hurt my wrist (the already unstable right one, which also happens to be my crutch hand) and bashed my tail bone...so feeling pretty uncomfortable right now.

formaldehyde_perfume

Education Other Than At School - Generally it caters for varying needs from physical disability to mental illness or autism, it is sort of an in between of mainstream and 'special' severe impairment schools. My friends sister has a chronic bowel problem and goes there, she goes 3 days a week and has private tutoring. Her problems aren't obvious but changing schools really helped her.

I understand how you feel about your body falling apart and not really being able to face it, but perhaps you could think about applying for your children who have behaviour problems due to autistic related disorders (sorry, I can't remember which one has what!) and the one with bad asthma (he has a lot of low times so you have to be up in the night caring for him, taking peak flows, drug regime etc - at least low rate care in my opinion!) and from what I remember they both have special consideration at school so you can be backed up by them. It's something I urge you to think about, even if you decide it's not the right time.

... I fell over on the bus trying to sit down, when it was still, I just miscalculated the distance. I felt such a silly sod!

On another note, I had a massage today and I thought my shoulders were fine but the lady said they were incredibly knotted and needed more treatment (which I felt once she put her hands on me), but she also said that my lower back pain/knots are radiating round to the sciatic nerve so I'm going to try and manage my money so I can have regular sessions as I think the more my muscles are 'normal' the more I will be able to exercise and perpetuate a positive health cycle. I also signed up to the disabled swimming sessions at my local pool.

SingleSue

Youngest son (complex autism, severe asthma, hypermobility syndrome, multiple food allergies, bowel disorder, gross food intolerances) does receive DLA, HRC and LRM, on an award that lasts until he is 16 (awarded for 10 years). Middle son (aspergers, brain damage, bowel disorder, partial deafness, probable EDS) used to receive DLA but a positive report from a new school when he was year 6 and had just returned to mainstream education after being in a special unit put paid to that...I didn't have the mental strength at that time to appeal (was mid breakdown at the time).

Eldest (EDS, heart murmur, POTS) is of the age when he decides for himself as he is 18 this year but he is rebelling against his diagnosis and doing everything completely opposite to advice, refusing to see his physio etc and refuses to ackowledge he has a disability....even when his joints are constantly dislocating and he is in pain.

Hmm, think we know where he gets it from! :rotfl:

I'll have to look into the alternative education options for youngest if he continues to be unsettled but everyone is really keen for him to stay mainstream (with a high level package of support) as he is so bright.

needing-help

Hi everyone. I know I dont post much but I read and some of you are having such terrible times. Sending ((((HUGS)))) to you all and hope things get sorted for you.

I have been having a rough time over the last few weeks but I'm still here and still fighting. I had to do my DLA renewal wich I was dreading but the award came back within 5 weeks and its indefinite this time so its a huge load of my mind.

xxxx