MFW DannyG's MF Diary!

pammyj74

Oh Danny, bless ya lol.
Try not to make being mf too much of an obsession or it will rule your life and you are too young for that already!!

If she spends something unrealistically then maybe say well thats one less flower arrangement on the table, or one less balloon display lol. She'll see that if she spends here, she cant spend there if you see what I mean.

There are a few people on here that are in a couple where only one of them is interested in the mf challenge and finances, unfortunately you have drawn that short straw but at least one of you is level headed enough to be great with the finances.

Do you each have your own 'spending money' accounted for in the month. You do need something where its ok to spend on a little something.

Now go and make up with your fiancee!!!!

twinklie

I've been on my journey solo for the best part of 2 or 3 years (I can't remember). However, over the last 3 months or so I've noticed changes in my DH. He's started to stop buying so much "big stuff" for himself. Now if only I could get him to food shop smarter we'd be on a role. It is hard but that's why it's important to come on here and let off steam.

I found out the other day that DH buys cakes on a Friday for the girls at work....yet I didn't get anything for my birthday!! I won't complain though...despite not getting anything for my birthday last year either! Hmmmm....

Radish72

New job list for Danny

1. Make up with fiancee
2. Work out a budget you both can stick to
3. Post budget on fridge so you can both see it
4. Discuss together your long term goals, mortgage free, wedding, babies
5. Enjoy your life together

Its very easier to get caught up in all the excitment when you first start a dairy, but its a long slog and frustation sets in that achievements can't be met straight away. Plus you also have a partner that as yet hasn't come on board with you and may never do so in the way that you want

You need to set some mini goals along the way so you feel a sense of satisfaction when they are reached

But also you are both in this together, I did think about not going to Germany the other week with friends, as my first thought was it could be £500 off the mortgage but life is also about having fun with people that means the most to you

Its tough that you have had to take a pay cut, so discuss what this means with her so she understands that things could have been a lot worse than they are

Don't mean to preach :rotfl:

SmlSave

Hope you've had time to calm down Danny.

[Deleted User]

hey Danny
sorry you guys had a fight ... hope things are okay now!

I agree with the others life is also for living! my OH isnt massivley enthusiastic about all this, but content to let me get on with it at the same time if it starts interfering with our life as a couple he , I imagine would start getting quite annoyed , so I think its a question of balance..

when I first started this I was all enthusiastic and wanted it to be paid off like NOW! whereas the reality is, at the very least it could take 9 or 10 years to pay off my mortgage at what I can afford to OP , and during that time I need, and want, a life - this is for the long haul and it is also about having your life while you do it! (note to self , must remember that!:rotfl:)

setmefree2

Oh dear Danny - I'm sorry but I'd never want to be in a relationship were I had to ask permission to spend £8!

Sorry I think you're out of order and I'm siding with your other half....

Lookingtothefuture

'Anyways i'm not speaking to her, shes not speaking to me and I'm enjoying the peace and quiet '

Hiya Danny!

LOL! Oh I had to laugh at this. Thanks for posting it... a couple of days time you will see the funny side too I am sure! Its all part of the journey.

I understand your point, its not the £8 its the principle... however she wont see it like that... she will see it as £8 and she does work too ( i assume as it was a leaving present for a work collegue). Seriously though try and make up, its not worth the hassle of an argument, even if you are enjoying the peace and quiet! Just think if you dont talk who will do all of your batch cooking?

Maybe take Radish's idea of sorting out a budget you have both had input on, so that she is in agreement and doesn't feel dictated too, and post it on the fridge.

You have made me laugh though... re read your rant! :rotfl:

MFW_DannyG

Lol cheers for your comments guys! Believe me, usually if she wants to spend 8 quid she can do I have no problem with that as long as its not totally wasted on something she'll never use/eat etc. But this month my pay cut has taken into effect so i have sat her down and explained just how tight money is this month, hopefully it wont be every month & after this one we can have a bit more freedom. The trouble is if things don't go to plan on site for a couple of months, my outgoings are going to be more than my incomings, (thats without savings and standard mortgage OPs).
Hopefully this makes it a bit clearer what I was so angry about?! Reading back i see i didn't explain myself as clearly as I should have!
Pammy, I know i realise it makes it harder that she doesn't get the whole MFW thing, and thats not a bad idea about the 'one less flower arrangement' etc thing. We don't have spending money as such but if we are gunna buy something like clothes or a present etc we always ask each other (sometimes it makes us realise we don't need it and it stops us both wasting money). Obviously little buys like snacks etc we dont bother!
Twinklie, I felt better after writing it all down last night so you are right about it helping! Also, if my mrs found out I was buying cakes for the girls at work she wouldn't be very happy!
SML, yea I have thanks, a whole day without speaking to a single person is lonely but gives you plenty of thinking time!
TYO, I know life is for living and we do do plenty, like i've said before its this month, possibly next where we are gunna struggle quite a bit and probably will end up in our overdraft at some stage!
SMF2, I wouldn't want to be in that situation where I had to ask or OH had to ask to spend £8, My only other options other than not spending a penny more than we have to for one or two months(hopefully max) is take out money from my ISA (I will loose part of my allowance for the year & The interest bonus) Or out of my regular saver (will loose all the interest) or theres always asking the mortgage company for some of my overpayments back (which i doubt) Sorry if you think i'm out of order but with the situation as it is i've got to make tough choices, believe me I would love to buy certain things & I would love to get a bday prezzie off OH at the end of august but if its a choice between that or giving as much chance as possible to keep out of the overdraft i'll go without.
Raddish, thanks for your list again! no.2 is easy, for the next month (at least) we have about 40-50 quid a week which has to buy food, the rest of our money is taken up by bills! so no.3 I will write a big sign on the fridge that says 'we have f**k all money to spend on luxuries'. no.4 is tricky as I was sure i did this on several occasions over the last month, with everything going on at work. But for some reason I get the feeling she doesn't take any of it seriously?! Or maybe shes got one eye on 'celebrity four weddings' on the tv while i'm talking!
And if it was a long term friend who had been there forever I wouldn't have so much of a problem with it, but she doesn't even like this girl and shes only been there for a month!
I think more than anything else i'm getting frustrated with her not taking our finances seriously, when I met her she had over £1500 of credit and store card debt and was always going over her £200 overdraft. I sat her down went through everything, sorted out 0% credit cards to take the debt on, and after a year we got her out of it and then she built up her bank balance. Then she moved in etc we got a joint account, she always goes on about its great not having to worry about being in debt etc, yet now money gets tight and she doesn't seem interested in helping.
Anyways i'm not gunna mention it again because A i'll probs get a bag on about it again and B you lot are sick of me moaning about it

PS on a different note I saw somebody today with a T-shirt on that had 'What would Jesus Do?' Printed on it. I think Martin should get some made saying 'What would Martin Lewis Do?' I reckon he'd make a few quid to put towards paying off his mortgage :rotfl:

MFW_DannyG

LTTF hiya! don't worry about who will do the batch cooking she hasn't done any of that either - but thats another rant for another day:rotfl:.

Lookingtothefuture

MFW_DannyG wrote: »

LTTF hiya! don't worry about who will do the batch cooking she hasn't done any of that either - but thats another rant for another day:rotfl:.

Oh dear... I should learn to kepp my big mouth shut! eek!

Spent 2 whole hours yesterday cooking and pureeing for my little girl. Got the Annabel Karmel book and so have made lovely lentils... she loves them Phew! Saves a few pennies. We have a man who lives around the corner from us who sells the fruit and veg he grows himself or gets as a good deal from the markets who cant sell it on the day. I got a whole bag of carrots form him yesterday for just 10p! bargain. So I put the little one in the buggy nipped up to see him and grab some bargains then took her to the park and checked out the blackberry bushes! Theres gonna be a big crop this year! Have my tubs ready for the collections.... yum yum blackberry and apple crumble here we come!... shame I cant find a stray apple tree... oh well I'll keep looking!

So today I'll be making Carrot and Lentil soup and two banana cakes to freeze so thats not wasted as we go away tomorrow! :money: plus more ironing! busy busy day again for me!

Maybe if you did a bit of batch cooking first it might inspire your OH? it seemed to work with the rice krispie cakes PLUS once she realises how easy it makes life in the long run with a little one she might really get into it. Spag bol and Chilli are easy to start with, put the correct portions for you into freezer bags or tubs and it saves so much time at a later date. Also soup is easy peasy to make and if its not enough for you as a whole meal (its not for my OH) then its a good starter and uses up all veg not looking its best... plus then you dont need as large a serving of main meal :money:

Glad you guys made up anyways! :T