Has anyone's boyfriend ever fallen in love with other women?

onlyroz

I think that a relationship such as Poly is describing can *only* work if all parties are completely honest with each other and are completely happy with the situation. I had a boyfriend who told me that he would be sleeping with other women. I was young and gullible at the time and accepted the situation for far longer than I should have. I was with him for around two years - but I was *not* happy about him being with other women. I think I put up with it because I was convinced that he was fundamentally honest. However, in the end he lied to me about something rather important and I no longer have any respect for the man at all.

Emmzi

oh roz, that sucks. the "told" is very different from the "discussed and agreed" that needs to happen. I hope OP does not get railroaded the way you did! She's been a bit quiet, I hope she is ok.

Kay_Peel

I'm not convinced that your boyfriend can 'love' other women. He may be fond of them, he may view them with particular affection, or admire them from a distance and fantasise about them - but it's difficult to show love outside of a relationship.

What concerns me is that he has put you in the very same category as all these other women that he is fond of. He's saying that you're a dear friend that he sleeps with, but you're no more special than x, y and z. No wonder you're hurt and angry because that's a cruel thing for a so-called boyfriend to say.

He's used you and humiliated you.

How you respond to this put-down is going to be very important. He'll expect you to be so desperate to keep him that you will endure a relationship without passion, devotion and shared love. No woman in her right mind would be put with that and I'm sure you'll handle it in your best interests.

Thank him for his honesty and tell him that you'll continue to love him as a friend but that you no longer consider him to be your lover or your special OH.

And show him the door.

So sorry to hear about your terrible plight at the hands of this twit - best of luck to you.